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Lemon, juniper, a shed load of abandoned clams, refried rice pudding, calone, the glue from discarded hymnbooks, wet sheep, more calone, the sputtering pilot-lights of old bathroom geysers, an underage orifice eased with Pledge and sanctimony, a Galia melon passing its sell-by date at the speed of sound, white lilacs in formaldehyde; lighter fuel; baby koala sick; isinglass. Though not necessarily in that order. Luca Turin’s entry on this in his Guide, and his rating of 5 stars for it, is his all-time I'm-still-a-schoolboy-at-heart low. By the way, if your partner’s semen smells like this, you should get him to a specialist.
13th January, 2009