Legit Compliments

Somebody on one of these threads wrote that they didn’t think verbal compliments meant that much (referring to girls’ interest level) and I kind of think the same thing. I am wondering how many of these compliments people write about are legit, as in "I really like this fragrance," and how many of them fall into the “make this person feel good category.”

I was just reading through the thread on how many sprays people use and it’s not uncommon for people to use upwards of 6 sprays. I know different frags have different strengths, but from what I was reading I get the sense that a lot of people are walking out the door with the olfactory volume on a bit high. When you draw that much attention to yourself of course people are going to say things because it’s in their face. If you’re a decent person, or at least not a total jerk, most people will say nice things, rather than tell you that you stink.

This reminds me of my friend Russ, who always gets compliments on his clothes. I brought up the topic of Russ’s admirers to some of my other friends and they were like, “yeah wouldn’t you want it if you spent $70 on a shirt every time you went out.” So when they compliment Russ its more to stroke his insecurities than taking a real liking to his clothes. I’m sure the same thing goes on when people wear a lot of fragrance and go around talking about fragrance to everyone. People are just going to tell them that they smell nice because it will make them feel good. This is kind of like when a girl changes her hairstyle. You always compliment the new look, even if she just hacked her hair into a mullet and looks like she just got off of the Quiet Riot tour bus.

Don’t give me the “I wear fragrance for myself and don’t care what others think” routine because if nobody cared about what others think compliments would not be such a big topic around here.

I wasn't trying to say that everyone here wears cologne for compliments and not for themselves. I was just trying to say that I didn't want to hear the whole spiel about how "I wear this for me and nobody else and fuck all others," I've heard all that before. I just wanted keep the conversation on the legitimacy of compliments. I'm making the argument that half the compliments people talk about are completely bogas. Yeah, I'm being a bit of a cynic, but I like to get real and talk about these things.

I think proximity has something to do with this too. If someone gives you a compliment, while giving you a hug, they probably genuinely think you smell nice. I say this because its socially appropriate, and pleasing, to have a nice scent within a close proximity of yourself, but if youre scent carries a great deal of distance youre getting into an area of vulgarity (some call this self confidence or putting themselves out there). People often compliment these folks because they seem to be fishing for it.

Nsamdi hit the nail on the head when he said, "I actually get really shy when someone says the words 'Is someone wearing cologne?'" I feel the same way too because it makes you feel whorish, but I think some people take these kinds of words and compliments at face value and it encourages them to spray even heavier. My overall point is that sometimes compliments are not a good thing. This is like when people get confused between others laughing with them when actually they are laughing at them.

I haven't been around on the boards for too long so I can't comment on whether or not compliments were talked about much last month or last year, but compliments have gotten plenty of air time in the few weeks of I've been around. Compliments may not be the main topic of the thread, but in several threads about fragrances you read people talking about how often a particular fragrance has garnered compliments. Im willing to bet that in the last month the words "compliment", "compliments" or "complimented" has show up at least two to three times more than the term Rive Gauche, which seems to be the hot fragrance on the board right now. If you analyzed words like Vetiver and Patchouli and broke them down into percentages they would look small as well, but I think most would agree that these notes are a big deal. Maybe you read different threads than I do, but I see compliments being talked about all the time.

Thanks for doing the dirty work for me Informer. And I thought "Informer" was a reference to that cheesy rap singer a few years back...

Sorry if I am coming off as "ungentlemanly" Rockford, but I was just backing up my original statement that you challenged. You're entitled to your opinion and I can disagree. Sorry if I’m playing a little too rough. I blame my childishness being raised in this culture. Dammit! It's too brutish and overly competitive.

Anyway, here I go again. I don't know how you figured I would lose the Rive Gauche vs. Compliment, Compliments or Complimented bet, but you could be right, but that’s besides the points. My initial claim was that compliments are a big topic around here and in the about the last 13 hours this post, titled "Legit Compliments," has had over 400 views. It's about the hottest topic on the board in the last day. Do we really want to sit here and play with semantics and percentages to figure out what constitutes a “big topic?” This was just a feeling I had when reading through multiple posts, I didn’t consider percentages when writing it, I won’t be so reckless next time.

Just to clarify my last comment, I'm an American (US). That's the culture I was referrring to. That was probably obvious from my statment.

Good luck luring those women with your Italian Shoes. The shoes may make them gush and tingle, but BELIEVE ME; they'll assume you're gay! Its an embedded stereotype in our culture, men into high fashion prefer other men. I'm sure women would think the same thing if they were keen to our exquisite fragrance taste, but the great thing about frags is very few are in the know.

"Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" was built on this premise.

I don't hold it against you DustB, I knew I was treading thin water with the gay stereotype comment. Anyway, this one probably has ran its course.