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what do you think of women wearing men's fragrance?

post #1 of 39
12/10/06 at 11:31am
Thread Starter 
Hi all,

I wanted to ask your opinion on this subject. If you were on a date with a woman and smelled a masculine fragrance on her, would it act as a turn-off? I am woman who loves to wear things like Dzing!, Vetiver Extraordinaire, and Jicky (not the most feminine frags around).

Should I go ahead and wear these or should I stick with more traditionally feminine fare on a date?
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post #2 of 39
12/10/06 at 11:40am
I don't really believe in gender-specific smells. Instead, I think of most of them just as marketing ploys. So, keep wearing what you like! Keep in mind that if somebody on a date with you would be turned off because you are wearing a certain scent that you love, you probably don't want to be with them anyway (it's a sign that it just isn't going to work out!!!)

I have several fragrances designed/marketed for women that I wear sometimes just because I love the scent. One of them is Marc Jacobs BLUSH, which is full of Jasmine (generally considered a very "feminine" scent), but I really am drawn to it anyway. I wouldn't wear it to a serious business meeting with conservative clients or coworkers, but I still own it and would wear it when going out. Guerlain also has some feminine marketed scents that I neverthess quite enjoy.

So, enjoy your Dzing, enjoy your Jicky. Hell, slap on some Bandit EDT or some Hermes Belami. If your date stays around past the first few minutes, then you know he/she is good to go! Skip the dessert course and just head over to the wedding chapel.
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post #3 of 39
12/10/06 at 11:52am
Hello bren,

I've always believed that staying true to yourself is very important when dating. After all, the whole point of dating is to find someone who you can embark on a serious relationship with (well, except for those who find flings appealing, but that's another topic). With time, they'll eventually realize what kind of person you are anyway, so don't 'surpress' your identity to please anyone.

If it works on you and is suitable for the occasion, just wear it. If your date doesn't appreciate this, and also sees it as a negative attribute, maybe it's better to find someone who does. If you're looking for an open-minded partner, maybe this will be a great test in itself.

Wear your frags with pride!
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post #4 of 39
12/10/06 at 12:00pm
I think it's great! Women has been doing it for decades. Greta Garbo, Marlene D. etc.
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post #5 of 39
12/10/06 at 12:06pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by bren

Hi all,

I wanted to ask your opinion on this subject. If you were on a date with a woman and smelled a masculine fragrance on her, would it act as a turn-off? I am woman who loves to wear things like Dzing!, Vetiver Extraordinaire, and Jicky (not the most feminine frags around).

Should I go ahead and wear these or should I stick with more traditionally feminine fare on a date?

I think you should wear what you like. I happen to like Rose Poivree by the Different Company, which I have layered with Lutens' Muscs Koublai Khan. Wore it to work and didn't get a single "you're a weird guy" look. Like others have said, I also like jasmine, which layers nicely with ambergris. Granted, there are certain fragrances that match a personality better than others do, but that has nothing to do with gender. I think I'm going to the mall and check out some Jicky...
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post #6 of 39
12/10/06 at 1:23pm
It wouldnt bother me one bit. Actually, it might be a bit of a turn on for a date to be wearing a mens scent. Also, i wear a bunch of different womens scents so hopefully a gal would like whatever womens scent i choose to wear on the date.
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post #7 of 39
12/10/06 at 1:24pm
Too general question. Dzing, VE are rather unisex, no problem with them.
If I would date a girl wearing men's Rive Gauche, perhaps I found it strange, the same applies to Equipage.
But love is blind - and perhaps its nose is stuffed and can't smell either
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post #8 of 39
12/10/06 at 1:28pm
Its not a problem really.

Not too long ago (ok, maybe a 100 years ago), florals used to dominate mens' wardrobes (and they werent the metrosexual type men).
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post #9 of 39
12/10/06 at 2:01pm
Seems I'm in the majority here in answering that it doesn't matter--which is great. Wear what you like!
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post #10 of 39
12/10/06 at 2:44pm
If a girl I was on a date with was wearing Brit Burberry for Men, I'd jump her bones, it smells that good to me. I think everyone should wear whatever they want.
- Rich
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post #11 of 39
12/10/06 at 3:37pm
bren, apparently, you got smndrummer so excited by the thought he hit the post button repeatedly!
looks like you are on the right track ...
wear what rings your bell, I say. My own favorite gender bending fragrance is Tabac Blond, even though it is marketed for women, it gets one in touch with her yang, shall we say
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post #12 of 39
12/10/06 at 4:16pm
I agree that I would not mind dating a woman who was wearing a male fragrance. (Though I think there would be some older ones that would be quite hard to get away with.)

But I think I should point out that if the question had been asked the other way round on the women's forum, there would not have been this kind of unanimity. And in the wider community I think there would not be much tolerance for men wearing women's fragrances generally.

People tend to hit the do-whatever-you-feel-is-right-for-you button too quickly. Sometimes I want to throw in "yes, but be prepared for others to give you a wide berth, if you offend against some tacit community code."
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post #13 of 39
12/10/06 at 4:28pm
I know that this topic has been covered a lot here at Basenotes: Men wearing fragrances marketed to women, and vice versa.

As a man who wears many fragrances marketed to women, I can tell you from my own experience that I don't have a problem with this at all.

To be specific and answer your particular question: I would like to smell a woman wearing a fragrance marketed to men, particularly if I liked the fragrance.

As Eluard said (correct me if I've gotten this wrong), there will always be those who have somewhat of an issue with this type of behavior.

I think all of the other feedback you've gotten here is right on target.

Wear what you like on the date. If your date appreciates it, fine. If not, you may want to make adjustments. I don't think that this (wearing whatever fragrance) should "make or break" the date, so you are probably safe in this department.

In closing I would like to add the following: Unless a woman recognizes the exact (marketed to woman's) fragrance that I am wearing, they usually feel as if I "smell good." If they do recognize it, this may bring up an issue such as, "isn't that such and such you are wearing?" If that happens, I take it from there and feel my way into it.

Best of luck.
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post #14 of 39
12/10/06 at 4:39pm
Ultimately the most attractive thing anyone, man or women, can be is to truly get in touch with their essence and reflect that in their dress/scent. If a masculine fragrance is what works for you, more power to you. I would certainly not think any less of a woman wearing a masculine fragrance.


Bill
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post #15 of 39
12/10/06 at 4:46pm
I MOSTLY wear men's frags and always receive compliments! I think that if your confident to wear something that may cause one to raise an eyebrow, your date will appreciate that. Confidence is sexy, ya know.
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post #16 of 39
12/10/06 at 5:17pm
If i'd smell a masculine scent on a woman in a date and it fits her well, I mean giving her a tremendous androginous sex appeal, it could be even a plus. If I like the woman, but not the scent, I could eventually decide to date her again and gifting her with a better scent. If I don't thing there will be a second date, for sure it'all about the person, not the scent.
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post #17 of 39
12/10/06 at 6:35pm
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Sexy. Just as long as I am not wearing the same one.
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post #18 of 39
12/10/06 at 6:36pm
  • Joy
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It's all very well to say that men should have no problem with wearing women's fragrances and any other man or woman who thinks it weird/a turn off has a problem, but I think the majority of people would perceive it in a negative light.

It's akin to wearing women's clothing. Sure, the material might be of the same cloth, and very similar in design, but society in general frowns upon men indulging in female

I'm in my mid-twenties, and I would fully expect the vast majority of girls to look upon me in negatively (at last, dissipating any attraction they would have had for me) if I were to wear makeup and a blouse and long skirt in any setting outside of a costume ball/prank. If i were to wear White Diamonds by ET or Curious by Britney Spears, I would not be surprised if it brought about a similar reaction, if not as strong. Not only would most people think it weird, but many people would question my sexuality, even if not openly.

The reason I'm going into this is that someone was saying that women who think like this probably aren't worth your time. You would be hardpressed to find a woman who would not think it odd of men to wear women's accessories.

As for women, whether they wear men's clothing or clothes, I couldn't care less, unless she wore something overpoweringly masculine/dirty like Kouros.
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post #19 of 39
12/10/06 at 7:10pm
Since the topic has been raised...

Two of my own experiences (honest):

Here in NYC there are all types of cultures and folks representing them.

1.) One of my coworkers is a self-proclaimed "Hip Hop Gangsta Tough Guy." A cool dude, he often wears Perry Ellis 360 for Women, and brags, "Yo! The women keep asking me why I smell so F*****' good!"

2.) Another coworker of mine is a real feminine lady. She confided in me: "I wear Kouros right between my legs. It drives men crazy!"

Interesting.
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post #20 of 39
12/10/06 at 7:28pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by smitsky

Since the topic has been raised...

Two of my own experiences (honest):

Here in NYC there are all types of cultures and folks representing them.

1.) One of my coworkers is a self-proclaimed "Hip Hop Gangsta Tough Guy." A cool dude, he often wears Perry Ellis 360 for Women, and brags, "Yo! The women keep asking me why I smell so F*****' good!"

2.) Another coworker of mine is a real feminine lady. She confided in me: "I wear Kouros right between my legs. It drives men crazy!"

Interesting.

Ha! Great stories! Particularly the second. Yup, I think that might drive me crazy too.
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post #21 of 39
12/10/06 at 7:37pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eluard

Ha! Great stories! Particularly the second. Yup, I think that might drive me crazy too.

Hey, maybe it's just in NYC / The "Liberal East Coast" that such things are accepted as a matter of course? Maybe in Texas or the Deep South (for example) people would receive harsher treatment for such acts.
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post #22 of 39
12/10/06 at 8:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by smitsky

Since the topic has been raised...

Two of my own experiences (honest):

Here in NYC there are all types of cultures and folks representing them.

1.) One of my coworkers is a self-proclaimed "Hip Hop Gangsta Tough Guy." A cool dude, he often wears Perry Ellis 360 for Women, and brags, "Yo! The women keep asking me why I smell so F*****' good!"

2.) Another coworker of mine is a real feminine lady. She confided in me: "I wear Kouros right between my legs. It drives men crazy!"

Interesting.

Crazy as in bashing my head up against the wall, yeah.
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post #23 of 39
12/10/06 at 8:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by smitsky

Hey, maybe it's just in NYC / The "Liberal East Coast" that such things are accepted as a matter of course? Maybe in Texas or the Deep South (for example) people would receive harsher treatment for such acts.

Yes, there may be something in that.

But I just think it is WAAAY more acceptable anywhere in the West for women to use things that are traditionally male, than vice versa. It isn't all that brave to do that.

So how to explain the Gangsta Rapper? Well, he is kind of daring someone to call him out on it. And if no one does, his choice comes across as tough. Someone else may well get called called on it and then it may appear very unmasculine. But this guy can get away with it and good for him that he can. But I don't think your typical Photoshop jockey could be advised to wear Opium for women out on a first date and expect to get respect for his choice. He probably won't. Sad, but there it is.
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post #24 of 39
12/10/06 at 8:07pm
Seems fine to me. Actually to do that takes a certain adventurousness which I find quite appealing.

I might, however, start to fear for the safety of my wardrobe...
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post #25 of 39
12/10/06 at 8:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eluard

Yes, there may be something in that.

But I just think it is WAAAY more acceptable anywhere in the West for women to use things that are traditionally male, than vice versa. It isn't all that brave to do that.

So how to explain the Gangsta Rapper? Well, he is kind of daring someone to call him out on it. And if no one does, his choice comes across as tough. Someone else may well get called called on it and then it may appear very unmasculine. But this guy can get away with it and good for him that he can. But I don't think your typical Photoshop jockey could be advised to wear Opium for women out on a first date and expect to get respect for his choice. He probably won't. Sad, but there it is.

I am in agreement. Well thought-out answer, I might add.
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post #26 of 39
12/11/06 at 4:55am
  • Ged
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There's one point everyone has missed...

Most guys would be over the moon just to be on a date, let alone get close enough to smell you (unless of course you are the woman who likes to spray Kouros in certain places...)
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post #27 of 39
12/11/06 at 5:04am
Women wearing mens fragrance? Depends on the fragrance and on the woman. Real woody, masculine fragrances or masculine fougere fragrances on a lady are a totall turn off to me. Most of today's modern mens fragrances, both fresh, fresh/orientals , are unisex enough for a women to wear though.
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post #28 of 39
12/11/06 at 7:18am
Quote:
Originally Posted by CologneJunkie

I MOSTLY wear men's frags and always receive compliments! I think that if your confident to wear something that may cause one to raise an eyebrow, your date will appreciate that. Confidence is sexy, ya know.

bang on the money.

My girlfriend's favorites are Dzing, Cuiron, Ezra Fitch (its a nostalgia thing), Dunhill 2003, Serge Lutens Datura Noir, Burberry London and D&G Light Blue. Of those, the only out and out feminie one is D&G Light Blue (Which is actually sold as unisex in Japan).

Basically, wear what you like.
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post #29 of 39
12/11/06 at 10:23am
Quote:
Originally Posted by bren

Hi all,

I wanted to ask your opinion on this subject. If you were on a date with a woman and smelled a masculine fragrance on her, would it act as a turn-off? I am woman who loves to wear things like Dzing!, Vetiver Extraordinaire, and Jicky (not the most feminine frags around).
Should I go ahead and wear these or should I stick with more traditionally feminine fare on a date?

If I wore these 30 years ago I would not have gotten picked to play basketball. And I'm 6'6". One team would be one man short. Times have changed a lot. Now the best players get picked, men, women, transexuals, it doesn't matter anymore. At least in the more civilised metro areas. If you have the moves and can find the basket, you're playing. I'd wear any of the ones you mentioned and be proud to accompany you as you wear yours.
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post #30 of 39
12/11/06 at 10:46am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eluard

But I don't think your typical Photoshop jockey could be advised to wear Opium for women out on a first date and expect to get respect for his choice. He probably won't. Sad, but there it is.

Why Photoshop jockey? Show me one advertisement in one national magazine that wasn't worked on in Photoshop. The best Photoshop artist we had on days was a gal. As long as she wasn't wearing something repugnant I don't think anyone in the shop cared what scent she was wearing. The exact same goes for the Photoshop expert on nights. We only did national advertising for billion dollar international ad agencys. When I was a Photoshop jockey, I performed scentless.

What she wears on a date really doesn't matter much if her IQ is in the room temperature range. I won't be dating her again.
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post #31 of 39
12/11/06 at 11:13am
I wear whatever fragrances appeal to my own nose. Sure, there are certain scents I wouldn't wear in the close quarters of my work environment; but as far as what sex a particular sent is marketed to -- I could care less.
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post #32 of 39
12/11/06 at 11:41am
I don't think that asking the question to fragrance buffs here at Basenotes is helpful. Wearing the opposite sex's fragrances are very acceptable here as part of the fragrance hobby, but I seriously doubt if these views are shared by the general public from which you would be dating. I never asked about women wearing men's fragrances, but everyone from the general public that I told about male Basenoters wearing women's fragrances thinks that the guys who do so are gay.

This wouldn't stop me from dating a lady. However, when I pass a woman on the street that's wearing a man's fragrance that I can recognize, I am turned off especially if it's one that I own!

I think that my views are well known here that I would never wear a woman's fragrance since it may be recognized by others who would wonder why I am wearing a woman's fragrance.
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post #33 of 39
12/11/06 at 11:53am
Well, Mike, to each his own, I guess.
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post #34 of 39
12/11/06 at 11:57am
Honestly alot of men's fragrances today would have been called women's fragrances a few years ago.

Givency Pi is nice on a man, but it's better on women. 212 Men is much better on women. M7 smells great on a woman, and M7 Fresh is probably better suited to women than men, though I do love it. There's tons and tons of others too.
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post #35 of 39
12/11/06 at 2:37pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by fredricktoo

Why Photoshop jockey? Show me one advertisement in one national magazine that wasn't worked on in Photoshop. The best Photoshop artist we had on days was a gal. As long as she wasn't wearing something repugnant I don't think anyone in the shop cared what scent she was wearing. The exact same goes for the Photoshop expert on nights. We only did national advertising for billion dollar international ad agencys. When I was a Photoshop jockey, I performed scentless.

What she wears on a date really doesn't matter much if her IQ is in the room temperature range. I won't be dating her again.

I chose 'photoshop jockey' as just one of those average, ubiquitous, white-collar jobs that is all.

My point was simply that the average guy can't get away with wearing women's scents. If he were to do it on a first date he likely wouldn't get a second. The advice to "just do whatever you feel like" is bad advice if someone cares about the reactions they will get. If they DON'T care about the reactions, then fine.

And there are lots of male scents that a woman could wear; doing so is not an especially brave act in our culture. Particularly as men's fragrances over the last few years have converged on women's scents anyway. Of course women can wear those fragrances without difficulty.

I guess my point was that this is an issue with a lot of asymmettry hidden inside it.
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post #36 of 39
12/11/06 at 3:02pm
If you are open-minded and progressive enough to enjoy wearing such fragrances, simply wearing them would be a nice easy way to screen out the clods and duffers who would somehow hold it against you for being so adventurous. If they are put off by your good taste, then this may be a good sign that there would be trouble down the line anyway. If the dates led to a long-term relationship, would you be willing to put away your masculine-marketed fragrances for good? If so, drop me a line when you need to get rid of that Vetiver Extraordinaire.

One other point is this: Both Dzing! and Jicky are generally considered unisex around here, and can scarcely be considered so masculine to raise any eybrows. Vetiver Extraordinaire is arguably one of the best vetiver based fragrances on the market and it would be a shame for only half the world's population to be "permitted" to wear it. It's not as if you were wearing Brut or Axe(or whichever commonly marketed cheap "masculine" fragrance one might name). I guarantee you that it is less than one in a million that anyone would recognize which of these fragrances you wear just from a whiff thereof, so fear that someone would recognize it as a masculine-marketed fragrance and count it against you is quite ludicrous.
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post #37 of 39
12/11/06 at 3:18pm
Well-

I LOVE it when a date is interested in my collection, and I go crazy if she wants to wear anything I have. I have several 'female' frags in my collection, and yet those are never the ones that the girls want to smell or wear.

Funny anecdote- I had a close lady friend over one night just to hang out. As we explored some of my newer scents, she told me to pick one out for her to wear that night. We went though about 6 or 7 bottles (Gaultier2: "too masculine," she said) before finding one that she really liked. The bottle was, of course, the Great White King: Kouros.

I think that 'masculine' scents are really just 'powerful' scents, or maybe 'animalistic' would be a better description. Anything that I like, I would like to smell on a woman. The only masculine scents that I think wouldn't be appealing on a woman are scents that I wouldn't wear on myself, either.

That might also explain the 'double standard' of feminine/masculine frags- I won't wear women's Chanels or Guerlains, but I would be excited to have my date wear the masculine counterparts (moreso, to be honest, than if they wore the women's lines). I like smelling of leather, wood, frankincense, and tobacco. There's absolutely no reason why my SO shouldn't smell like those things, too.


I like what I like for a reason.


-ben
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post #38 of 39
12/11/06 at 3:19pm
IMHO, women have a far easier time borrowing from the men's world than vice versa. The Mrs. has borrowed my shirts, shoes, and jeans from time to time, and I would not be surprised or upset or turned off in the least if she wore one of my scents.

Go for it - you'll be happier that way.
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post #39 of 39
12/12/06 at 8:20am
Quote:
Originally Posted by bren

If you were on a date with a woman and smelled a masculine fragrance on her, would it act as a turn-off?
Should I go ahead and wear these or should I stick with more traditionally feminine fare on a date?

For me, it would never be a turn off, i even think that would make the lady even more interesting.
You should go ahead with these, if you like them and wear them it's ok because it's a matter of personal choice.
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