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What's up with all those tip jars?

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
What's up with all those tip jars?
Tipping has spread to businesses where the customer does a lot of the work.


Christian Science Monitor
Am I alone in taking pointed notice of all the tip jars that have blossomed on business countertops? From delis to pizzerias, Chinese takeout joints to barbershops, the word has spread like wildfire: If you put out a tip jar, people will fill it.

Well, maybe they will, but I have yet to be shamed (if this is the right word) into casting my coin into the tip jar fountain. Perhaps it is the scientist in me, but I try to reason the situation out like this: I call in my order to the Chinese restaurant. I drive there to pick it up. I pay the menu price. Why on earth would I pay more than they are asking for their product? Doing so strikes me as positively un-American.

Tipping used to be confined to service-oriented occupations: waitresses, taxi drivers, doormen. Now it has spread to businesses where I seem to be doing most of the work.

Attempts at justification
Just recently I was in a general store where I roamed the aisles, collected my goods, brought them to the counter and even packed them myself. I paid the cashier $23.97 and then noticed a rather ostentatious pickle jar by the register. It was brimming with coins and paper money. On its face was written, in large red letters so as not to escape notice, "TIPS!" The addition of that exclamation point seemed to push the thing beyond a suggestion toward the realm of subtle demand.

Sometimes the tip jar bears an explanation or justification of the recipient's need for the extra cash, such as the annotation, "For college." And then there was this cryptic one I saw in a service station: "For unanticipated expenses." Hmm. Don't we all have these?

All this reminds me of a little incident with an Internet retailer. On the order form after I had added up the total for goods and shipping, was an additional charge of $1, for "immediate replacement of lost or damaged goods."


There was no way for me to decline or eliminate this fee, so I called them. The pleasant woman at the other end of the line explained that the fee was a bargain because it would ensure my satisfaction with my purchase.

"Ma'am," I calmly began, "if I am not satisfied with this purchase, I expect you to remedy the situation in any event."

She removed the $1 fee.

Nobody will notice
The moral of this tale is that these companies seem to assume that nobody -- except for me! -- will notice or care if an additional buck or two is appended to an order. Considering the large customer bases involved, this can add up to a lot of money. I think this is precisely what has spilled over into the ad hoc tipping jar phenomenon we're now experiencing. If the college student who works at the local taco stand puts out his or her jar and makes an extra $10, $20 or $30 a day, well, why not? It's not as if people have to cough up a tip.

At this point I'm willing to admit that maybe I'm being a curmudgeon about this -- or even worse, a cheapskate. But although I don't contribute to these ubiquitous, beckoning Mason jars, I think there is an insidious effect on the young.

Yelling may feel good, but when it comes to getting resolution to your consumer complaint, there are better ways to succeed.

On a visit to a bakery with my son, I had just paid for my bagels when Anton nudged me and pointed to the tip jar. "Dad," he said, "aren't you going to tip them?"

I looked at the milk-faced student behind the cash register, who beamed at me. "Thank you," I told him, "and have a nice day."

This didn't end the conversation. In the car on the way home, Anton asked me how I would feel if I had a tip jar and nobody put any money in.

A little classroom experiment
No one had ever asked me this before. As a teacher it had never occurred to me to put one of these jars on my desk. And so I decided to conduct an experiment. The next day, when I entered the classroom, I casually pulled a small jelly jar from my bag and placed it on my desk. On the front was a neat label, "Tips." I didn't do anything else to draw my students' attention to it and ignored the low mumble that the act incited.

At the end of the lecture, as the students filed out, I'll be darned if a few of them didn't throw their loose change into the jar. I gave it all back, of course, but their quiet gestures did lend me a small thrill, a sense that my teaching efforts were worth more than my salary alone.

Well, I still don't put money in tip jars, but I have put one of these jars in my son's room. Sometimes, when he does something positive or helpful without being told, I throw a couple of quarters in. He appreciates this and looks for opportunities to lend a hand wherever he can. I think that as long as we can keep this under control, I will not have created unreasonable expectations. But mum's the word.
post #2 of 17
I hate those jars too. I'm a waiter/bartender who works for tips and I think it makes a mockery of tipped professions. There's a difference between busting your ass for tips (because you're being paid less than minimum wage) and sitting there behind a counter with a cup that's basically like having your hand out.

I sometimes put money in these jars, because I don't like to rock the boat-- but honestly the employers need to put a crackdown on these "jars". The thing that really annoys me the most about these jars is when you put a dollar in, they rarely even thank you anyway. Ingrates!
post #3 of 17
I recall a woman who worked the bar area of an upscale restaurant/bar chain, her location was in north Atlanta, just off I-75.

The restaurant always had people waiting for tables at peak hours and prices were commensurate with the upscale look/food/service you could expect there.

This particular woman, probably in her late 30's, was working a 20-odd seat bar one Friday noontime I stopped in to eat, serving drinks and taking food orders for those who chose to eat lunch there at the bar which had about a dozen people standing with drink in hand. They stood behind those sitting and drinking as all the stools were filled. She moved with effortless grace and surgeon-like precision, taking orders, making and refilling drinks and all the while providing alcoholic drinks for the entire restaurant through table servers who constantly appeared in one area. She never stopped moving and her every movement it seemed accomplished something productive.

Having had retail luncheon counter service experience myself many years ago, I was just amazed at her skill and her speed at keeping things going with, apparently, no one waiting long for their particular order. I watched her 'float' rapidly to the food pickup area to bring back several lunches at a time, appearing as though she was on some rapid magic carpet, never seeming to be rushed. She was most pleasant and witty in the multi-conversations she kept up with customers and staff as her hands and feet made magic. In my 45 minutes of lunch she probably made $75 in cash as best as I could count (a few $10s and I saw nothing less than a $5 tip in cash from individuals at the bar, and I would assume she made a similar amounts on credit cards (about half the customers paid that way) and for all the busy hours she worked.

I didn't return to that restaurant for almost a year after that visit. She was no longer employed there and I asked one of the two new bartenders now working the bar about her.

He remembered her (he had been a waiter during her stay) and told me she had 'retired', as she had saved enough and invested wisely enough to do that before her 40th birthday!

We both agreed that she probably made in the neighborhood of $100-150/hour at peak and whatever the establishment paid her hourly as well. I would suppose she had a deal with them for far more hourly than an 'ordinary' bartender would be paid as she kept the (profitable for the establishment) drinks flowing during her shifts.

No tip jar necessary for her.
post #4 of 17
Greg,
That's a great point. Generally I tip at 20% or more when eating out. I've worked in restaurants, and being a constant restaurant patron, it's pretty blatantly obvious how hard people are working. Being frugal, I sometimes enjoy using discount coupons, but even when I do, I tip for the full amount. To me, when I go out for a meal, someone who is serving me is doing me a favor and merits respect.

The other day I stumbled upon an interesting site, "Customer's Suck", where there are fascinating tales of what it's like to be berated by customers. Customers truly think they're always right. (except, of course, our eminently fair and kind population at BN!) Here's a beauty:
http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=291

But I agree, pimping for tips by everybody has gotten out of control. Every take-out place and ice cream stand is doing it. I think it's nonsense, and just ignore the jars with no guilt whatsoever, although once in awhile I'll make an exception for exceptional service. I'm not sure why this is tip jar proliferation is occurring. I suppose it's a way to get free money. Some will disagree, but if they should be tipped, well, the person at the grocery store should make tips, too - they work hard, and are nice. And I maybe a nice tip jar at the gas station. Hey, everybody else is doing it!

But that internet merchant story goes way beyond that - clearly some marketing genius discovered a New Revenue Stream. I'm glad you told them to get stuffed.
post #5 of 17
I was threatened by waitresses in the last place I worked not to report my full amount of tips, because it would make it obvious they are lying and don't intend to pay taxes on them. Those tip jars disappear from store countertops when authorities or inspectors are around for the same reason, they do not report their income from them.

Another thing that bothers me is people leaving money jars around in stores because they have health or other problems and never bought insurance. We can't afford insurance, either, but we do without other things in order to pay for it.

The worst is this annoying habit of young waitresses new to the job referring to me as "honey" or "sweetie," when they are half my age and never saw me before. It is really disrespectful and overly familiar and has gotten so bad around here, I can be called something like that five or six times by different workers in a restaurant before I ever walk out the door. So phony! So is paying an inordinate amount of attention to my husband to get a bigger tip. It doesn't work out very well for them because I carry the money. hehehe
post #6 of 17
And to further elaborate on how annoying this tip jar phenom is...

At the hotel where I work, we are not allowed to keep our tip jar visible to the guests when we are tending bar-- the bartenders' tip jar must be kept out of sight, under the cash register. It's stupid because sometimes really dense people come in and get something from us and look around for a tip jar and don't see one-- and mistakenly assume we don't take tips.

Yet, at the gift shop-- guess what's popped up in the last two weeks? A TIP jar RIGHT ON THE COUNTER!?! It infuriates me that the management is so intent on trying to make the bartenders HIDE their tip jars-- as if having a visible tip jar is somehow "gauche", while allowing the register jockeys* at the gift shop set a big, cozy mug with the word TIPS on it under the guests' noses.

No offense to register jockeys
post #7 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by beachroses View Post

The worst is this annoying habit of young waitresses new to the job referring to me as "honey" or "sweetie," when they are half my age and never saw me before. It is really disrespectful and overly familiar and has gotten so bad around here, I can be called something like that five or six times by different workers in a restaurant before I ever walk out the door. So phony! So is paying an inordinate amount of attention to my husband to get a bigger tip. It doesn't work out very well for them because I carry the money. hehehe

Right! I don't hear as much "honey" or "sweetie" around here, but I know what you mean. I don't even like "guys" being used as a moniker for absolutely everyone, but that's a function of my age, and I'm swimming against the tide.

Since we're on the subject, another favorite: "Hi! I'm Jennifer, and I'll be your server tonight". I don't need to know your name, and I'm glad you said "tonight", because I was pretty sure that you were going to come to my house and wait on me next Thursday. I just want professional, discreet service.

The other one I like is when they sit down with you when taking your order. I don't get annoyed, just amused, but I can see where many would not like the "instant familiarity". As far as I'm concerned, if they sit down, that gives me a license to bust their chops, which I usually do mercilessly if they evince any sense of humor at all. You can easily imagine some marketing geniuses thinking, "ooo, now we're going to build rapport with the customer by using our names, and if we say 'tonight', ooo, it increases intimacy".

Disclosure: I have participated in the tip jar phenomenon myself, when playing classical/flamenco guitar in restaurants. So maybe I shouldn't be so quick to condemn it. It's a grey area, for sure.
post #8 of 17
I was a bartender and server for around 5 years and made good money at it. It was a blast too. It's one profession where sexual harassment (playful tongue-in-cheek usually) among the employees was almost expected, and I for one had fun with it.

Anyway, I can't recall ever seeing a tip jar at a place where tips are expected (like a bar) except BEHIND or UNDER the counter where the bartenders could accumulate them to divide up later. Tipping your bartender or waitress is usually the norm in the US and most patrons know to leave it on the table or bar or give it directly to their server.

I am now a software developer and DB analyst and sit in an office all day. A few years ago, I noticed a tip jar at my local Dunkin Donuts. It made me smile on the outside and laugh my ass off on the inside. What exactly was I supposed to be tipping for? A smile? And if I didn't tip, next time you would not smile at me? Why do you need a tip for doing the job you're being paid to do? So anyway, when I got back to work, I went to the breakroom and stole an empty 5 gallon water jug (the ones that get delivered by the water delivery guy), brought it back to my office, and put it just inside my office door and attached a large paper label "TIPS." I positioned it so it would be noticed by anyone walking out of my office and also by anybody passing by in the hallway. I did it as a joke of course. I got a lot of hysterical laughs, some sympathy tips (my coworkers felt sorry that it was "so" empty), loose change, candy, and a few pieces of folded-up paper with various insightful "tips" (suggestions) written on them I left it there for about a month til pretty much everyone had seen it and I just got bored with it.

I think I'm going to make some little folded paper "tips" of my own for when I come across these hand-out jars. I will copy a 1 or 5 dollar bill on one side and on the other will print "Here's a 'tip' for ya. This is an insult to those of us that actually do work for tips."
post #9 of 17
Well, having been a server, I know and understand their plight. $2.13 an hour? Yeah, $2.13 and you know what? I averaged $20/hour on the hot weekends because I busted my ass. After two months there, I stayed the highest percentage earning server for the tenure of my stay. Tips at Chipotle, or the donut shop? Not so much. You've got a job standing behind a counter making $7-8/hour. I've done it before, and I freaking hated it, but I didn't expect a tip whenever I counted out your change correctly.

Why do servers tell you their name? I don't know, because maybe when you forget to ask for ranch, you don't have to send them to get one thing at a time. If I'm walking away just yell "RICH!", and I'll be happy to get you whatever you need. "Hey you!" is surprisingly ineffective in a restaurant, and I don't want to make 6 separate trips because you're stupid or just spaced out. If I do have to do that for you, you'd never know that I was frustrated though... I'd just spit in your fries. Not really. But seriously, I would....


Not really.
- Rich
post #10 of 17
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by _R$_ View Post

If I do have to do that for you, you'd never know that I was frustrated though... I'd just spit in your fries. Not really. But seriously, I would....


Not really.
- Rich



mmmmm... poutine!
post #11 of 17
How bout Starbucks!

If I'm already paying $4.65 for a coffee, and you have the nerve to put a big annoying tip jar right next to the register, don't hold your breath for tips. This isn't freakin' Mexico.
post #12 of 17
I have a question about tips:

For picking up chinese food or getting ice cream at the window, and they give you a receipt with a tip space, do you tip or not? I don't , figure I did the work by going to the place to get it, and they didn't wait on me like at a table, etc. Yes?
post #13 of 17
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattybumpkin View Post

I have a question about tips:

For picking up chinese food or getting ice cream at the window, and they give you a receipt with a tip space, do you tip or not? I don't , figure I did the work by going to the place to get it, and they didn't wait on me like at a table, etc. Yes?


That's an excellent question. Should you tip when you pick up a carry out order?

When I pick up a pizza at Little Ceasars, or a carry out order from Outback Steakhouse, or California Pizza Kitchen, if you pay with a credit card they always have that "tip" space on the receipt. Even at Carribou coffee.

I know Panera Bread doesnt solicit tips on their receipts.
post #14 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by _R$_ View Post

Why do servers tell you their name? I don't know, because maybe when you forget to ask for ranch, you don't have to send them to get one thing at a time. If I'm walking away just yell "RICH!", and I'll be happy to get you whatever you need. "Hey you!" is surprisingly ineffective in a restaurant, and I don't want to make 6 separate trips because you're stupid or just spaced out. If I do have to do that for you, you'd never know that I was frustrated though... I'd just spit in your fries. Not really. But seriously, I would....


Not really.
- Rich

Exactly. Also, if a female server tells you her name, it's good to try to remember it so you're not in the awkward situation of staring at her chest trying to read her name tag while she's moving in the dim light.

A few weeks ago I found myself in the middle of a nasty situation with some guests at the bar. I was tending bar by myself and a wedding reception had just let out and a bunch of drunk revelers descended upon my bar. One of my coworkers' adult daughters was one of the people at the bar-- with this being the case, I went out of my way to be extra nice to the people in the party and more tolerant than usual of drunken party fouls.

Well, everybody was yelling and getting stupid-- they were kind of white trash. Finally, things went awry. Some guy in a red tank top shouted out a drink order at me and finished by calling me "homie" in a derisive manner-- which got a burst of laughter from his friends. I simply replied "My name is Ted," to which the guy got really pissed off and made some comment about not being expected to know my name.

I told him if he wanted my attention, he could have just called me "sir" or "hey bartender" and it would have been fine. But things got out of hand. He started yelling at me (it turns out this hoosier was the groom), and several women in his party were yelling at me and trying to hold him back-- while I was trying to defuse the situatuon.

Then an angry female friend thrust a $20 bill at me and then said "Here, THIS is so next time you don't insult my wedding party again." At that point I took the $20 bill and threw it back in her face and told her that she wasn't going to talk to me like that.

Then there was all kinds of shouting going on. Some other girl was in my face telling me that "he (the groom) was raised in the streets, that's just how he talks" etc. You know how it gets when drunk people can't let go of something-- Finally I told my managers to watch the bar and I went out back on the loading dock and fired some old stale hard rolls at the dumpster as hard as I could until I felt better.

Later, the guy came back in and apologized for his behavior-- I accepted his apology and gave him and his bride some drinks on the house and congratulated them-- he also gave me $20 and I took it.

So I guess the lesson is if you don't know someone's name, try to be respectful-- It's annoying to have waitresses call you "sweetie" all the time, but it's also tiresome being referred to as "Chief" or "Buddy" or "Homie" or whatever.
post #15 of 17
Been workin' the bar long?

You can expect photocopies of that night to happen over and over and over and over and over for as long as you work there. That's what happens at bars. Bartender is not a good position for a considerate person that takes what people say seriously. You almost have to be drunk to bartend and not want to kill yourself and everyone around you.

Drunks are far too insane for me to ever cater to again. I've bartended and drove a "drunk bus" - type taxi...3 bucks a head to and from the bar. I've hosed and vaccuumed vomit from the seats, I've mopped it up...I'm not doing that anymore, regardless of how fun the job was.

you can pretty much assume that a drunk doesn't and isn't going to comprehend any sort of reasonable conversation or instructions... they have no ability to cooperate...they basically become evil, vomiting, rowdy children.

Have fun! Glad you turned a lemon into lemonaid in this situation! Sometimes, when the drunk guy calms down and realizes how stupid he was (and is), he'll have a rare confessional of his dumb behavior, and when he sees how calm you've been and how well you've handled things, they REALLY appreciate it. And sometimes they'll tip the hell out of you when this happens.

Red tank top for his groom's party huh?
post #16 of 17
Starbucks is highway robbery. I went to that place and expect me to pay 5Euros(8$ or so) on a slice of cake. I mean wtf, I can buy a whole cake at that price. lol

Getting back to the point. I've been a waitress from 14 and 10 months to 16 and 4 months and besides the first day when I did a mess and ruined a couple's date by keeping asking them questions and messing up the order, forcing them to ask for a new waitress(I mean wtf can you expect from the first day of work of a 14 years old lol), I did a pretty good job and I was making way more out of tips than the wage I had. Probably because of the innocent "I'm staving" look on my face. For that I respect waiters and always tip them if they are bringing the order well and stuff(I over-tip actually). I mean besides serving people I had the annoying 12 hours night shifts too sometimes in which you clean the place, so I know it's a hard thing to do... being a waiter. Anyway, I find it rude to ask for tips in a job where you don't do much, but sit there and move the objects through that laser reading shit. I mean, yes, here you have to bribe people, but this didn't happen so far. lol. I'd laugh in that person's face if they'd do a tip jar. I usually leave the change to the person there, but if they'd have a jar, I'd ask for all my money back because it's offensive to me.
post #17 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scentronic View Post

Been workin' the bar long?

You can expect photocopies of that night to happen over and over and over and over and over for as long as you work there. That's what happens at bars. Bartender is not a good position for a considerate person that takes what people say seriously. You almost have to be drunk to bartend and not want to kill yourself and everyone around you.

Yeah, last night I had a similar run in. Some Canadian guy came in while we were balls to the wall busy-- I mean we were SLAMMED and actually requested free samples of like eight of our microbrews. I was actually nice and gave him the samples (We don't normally DO samples), and when I turned to help somebody else I heard him complain that the glasses weren't cold enough (we were going through glasses so fast they didn't have time to chill). Then he bought three Oktoberfests and stiffed me on the tip.

Then later, he started an argument with the other bartender about our policy of requiring a credit card or room number to start a tab. He started cursing at us. We tried to have him thrown out, but he wanted to argue. He was a jerk. Eventually, the GM relented and let him stay, because it would have been too much of a hassle to throw him out. He sat there and gloated because he threw such a fit that he even got his meal comped.

.

Well, today I got to work and found out that Karma bit him on the ass. Apparently he was downtown today and he got robbed. Ha ha ha. Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

Yes, I often do want to kill drunk people-- but I always keep prescription sedatives handy! (for myself of course).
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