Today's SOTE has been Thiery Mugler A*Men Pure Coffee
WARNING: RANT INCOMING
My basic gripe with Pure Coffee is the same I have for every single chocolate frag I've tried: It doesn't smell like actual chocolate. The "chocolate" note that everyone seems to use, from perfumes to chocolate-scented candles to chocolate-flavored lip balm to whatever, always smells to me like an oddly synthetic mix of patchouli, cardboard, and actual chocolate. I've even smelled all-natural essential-oil scents and flavorings derived from actual cocoa beans, and it smells like the weird fake "chocolate" too.
So this leads me to believe that the smell of rich chocolate is somehow too nuanced to be recreated. Something about the roasting of the beans and the conching and the tempering and everything else makes the smell of actual chocolate so complex that the smell and taste of it simply can't be recreated without actual chocolate.
I think the thing that chaps my hide is that no one seems to care. Burr gave Pure Coffee four stars! People insist that Tootsie Rolls and Oreo cookies taste like real chocolate. And people smell the crime against humanity that is Montale's Chocolate Greedy and say "Mmm - chocolate!" and are perfectly happy, while I'm trapped in my little padded cell screaming "That's not what chocolate smells like!!!"
Maybe I'm the weird one here (ok, definitely
I'm the weird one here), but I just wish perfumers would go out and buy a chocolate bar - even cheap stuff like Hersheys or Cadbury that's more wax than chocolate - and put it in a little pan on the stove. Turn on the heat and melt it. That intoxicating, life-affirming aroma that's filling your kitchen? THAT'S what chocolate smells like...
So, if it's true that the beautiful true aroma of chocolate is simply un-recreatable, there can simply never be a chocolate scent that I'll ever like.
Sort of depressing.
Anyway, back to A*Men Pure Coffee.
It started briefly with a combination of coffee and patchouli before quickly fading to a faux-chocolate/lavender combination that suffers from the problems stated in my above rant.
Not really bad, but it comes off on me as more of a lavender/patchouli lightly flavored with coffee and chocolate than the unabashed gourmand I was expecting.
I prefer Bond's New Haarlem to this, honestly, though I'm still not 100% convinced that NH is coffee-grail material.
The search continues...