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My First "Female" Scent....Inadvertently

post #1 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:29pm
Thread Starter 
I received a sample of Costamor Tabacca a couple weeks ago and loved it, so I bought a bottle. It arrived today.

I sprayed it on, and while it smelled exactly like the sample, it was slightly softer. It dawned on me that this *might* just be intended for women. Then I looked more closely at the bottle. Not entirely feminine, but not exactly macho, either. Maybe it was the butterfly that tipped me off. A quick check of a couple sites confirm this. Even Luckyscent shows it towards the "feminine" side on their little scale. I'd failed to notice this when I ordered it from them.

While I admire the guys around here who wear whatever they damn well please, I never foresaw wearing a "woman's" fragrance myself. I'm not sure whether this is a good thing or a bad thing. I'm not worried about the stigma (or whatever). I'm worried that I've just broken down a mental barrier, and the effect that it may have on my bank account.

*raids wife's perfume cabinet*

I should add that my wife can wear the spicier, gourmand type scents very well (Angel on her blows me away), but I don't think Tabacca would work on her.
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post #2 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:38pm
Like you said - a mental barrier. And it's not just the wearer - it's the sniffer. I've had people ask me, almost shocked, if certain "masculine" scents I was wearing were feminines. And vice versa.

You went with your nose on this one, and you made a good choice. Good job!
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post #3 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:38pm
Nice.

I hasten to add that you are right to worry about that mental levee breaking; now there are at least twice as many fragrances as before out there worth a sniff.

You've a lot of work ahead of you, my man.
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post #4 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:39pm
This is the best way to view scent: as genderless and pleasant. This is like food or wine.
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post #5 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:48pm
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Primrose View Post

This is the best way to view scent: as genderless and pleasant. This is like food or wine.


The are those French and some others who often refer to Bordeaux wines as masculine and Burgundy wines as feminine. I call them both delicious. Go figure..
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post #6 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Primrose View Post

This is the best way to view scent: as genderless and pleasant. This is like food or wine.

Steak

Salad

Rice

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post #7 of 33
7/29/10 at 6:49pm
Thread Starter 
Thanks gents. Tomorrow I'll wear my favorite--the uber-macho Aramis--to balance things out.

Oh, wait.....
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post #8 of 33
7/29/10 at 7:06pm
Just yesterday I was in the back room/breakroom at work and a female coworker was spraying herself down with a fragrance sample by Vera Wang probably Glam or Rock Princess(sorry I can't remember which one ) and it smelled nice to me but also rather masculine . (Highly unlikely for her she wants to get the new Chloe and has Lola -me 3-4% of my collection is masculine or sold as unisex)Thought I would mention in case A Homme wants some ideas as a recent release the mall may have samples for free too.
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post #9 of 33
7/29/10 at 7:08pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by PaulSC View Post

Steak

Salad

Rice


snicker Dibs on chocolate!
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post #10 of 33
7/29/10 at 7:54pm
I once wore Bond No 9's Nuits de NoHo and the ladies loved it. I found out later it was "for women"...then later found out some Basenoters think it works both ways.

I prefer women to smell like women, but I think more women can pull off wearing a masculine fragrance than vice versa. Certainly there are some "women's" fragrances that work on most men and some that work on only a few guys.
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post #11 of 33
7/29/10 at 10:26pm
I have always preferred Burgundy wines over Bordeaux
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post #12 of 33
7/29/10 at 10:52pm
In this age of men wearing super-sweet frags, I don't really think the traditional ideas about frags make any sense. Also, drydowns are often unisex, so it may just be a matter of waiting for it before you go out in public. And you can tell people you are wearing a "men's" frag if anyone asks. Just do a search for similar notes in the BN directory and say you are wearing one of the "masculine" ones. And then if there is further questioning, just say you have peculiar skin chemistry. LOL.
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post #13 of 33
7/29/10 at 10:54pm
Step one: mental barrier broken.
Step two: A. Femme.
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post #14 of 33
7/29/10 at 11:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by DustB View Post

Step one: mental barrier broken.
Step two: A. Femme.

Hilarious!
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post #15 of 33
7/29/10 at 11:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emlynevermore View Post

Nice.

I hasten to add that you are right to worry about that mental levee breaking; now there are at least twice as many fragrances as before out there worth a sniff.

You've a lot of work ahead of you, my man.

So very true...so very true
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post #16 of 33
7/30/10 at 7:38am
It's still a no-go zone for me, as I would have to lie when people ask me what I'm wearing. It would be to embarassing to tell them I'm wearing something for females.

For non-Basenoters that would be the same as wearing a G-string.

But I have to admit, I enjoy the quite feminine White Aoud from Montale.
And I would love to try Black Orchid.
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post #17 of 33
7/30/10 at 11:26am
Quote:
Originally Posted by JBL View Post

It's still a no-go zone for me, as I would have to lie when people ask me what I'm wearing. It would be to embarassing to tell them I'm wearing something for females.

For non-Basenoters that would be the same as wearing a G-string.

But I have to admit, I enjoy the quite feminine White Aoud from Montale.
And I would love to try Black Orchid.

Black Orchid is actually pretty good and mixes great with White Patchouli. I recently sprayed some Black Orchid on top of Oud Wood and it worked very well.
My first femme frag was shalimar. I am still trying to like it. I am not much into the powdery dry down, but I must admit I am starting to like Le male, Joop, Amen, etc
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post #18 of 33
7/30/10 at 11:41am
I was testing...eh hm, Hidden Fantasy last night and I asked my wife what she thought of it. She sniffed my wrist and said, "Yeah, that's a nice one. What is it?" Took me a few moments to answer. Not because it's a female marketed fragrance but because it's a Britney Spears one!!! AHHH!!

The thing is, you never know how something is going to smell on YOU, so spritz away, my friend!
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post #19 of 33
7/30/10 at 11:43am
Quote:
Originally Posted by JBL View Post



And I would love to try Black Orchid.

I think Black Orchid is right on the neutral line.
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post #20 of 33
7/30/10 at 2:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kerosene View Post

I think Black Orchid is right on the neutral line.

I have worn it twice and both times I have gotten compliments from the Ladies around me, so I'll say is a good frag. Should give it a try and while you are there might want to try Black Aoud by Montale. It has a rose scent in it, but I think a man can easily wear this.
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post #21 of 33
7/30/10 at 4:49pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by DustB View Post

Step one: mental barrier broken.
Step two: A. Femme.

LOL.....well played.
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post #22 of 33
7/30/10 at 5:37pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scentdawg View Post

I have worn it twice and both times I have gotten compliments from the Ladies around me, so I'll say is a good frag. Should give it a try and while you are there might want to try Black Aoud by Montale. It has a rose scent in it, but I think a man can easily wear this.

Black Aoud might be a manly rose indeed.
Although I'm personally still not convinced for the full 100%, which probably means I should draw conclusions.
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post #23 of 33
7/30/10 at 8:22pm
I'd call that a lucky break, A.Homme. But you're right, certain female-marketed scents just do not go with some women. Likewise certain fragrance with strongly masculine profiles do not match some men. And I think it is this sort of 'intuition' about a fragrance's wearability factor that makes one fragrance-savvy. So congrats!
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post #24 of 33
7/30/10 at 8:31pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by JBL View Post

It's still a no-go zone for me, as I would have to lie when people ask me what I'm wearing. It would be to embarassing to tell them I'm wearing something for females.

For non-Basenoters that would be the same as wearing a G-string.

My first "female" scent also came about inadvertently. I was looking for a distinguished, slightly animalic oriental scent and it just happened that Shalimar EdP was loads better than any of the other stuff I tried.

Besides, what's in a name, really? They are all silly to some extent, independent of the sex to which they are marketed. Unless it's called "Menstruation pour Femme" or something, I think a simple "it's better than the men's version" will nip any further inquiries in the bud.
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post #25 of 33
7/30/10 at 8:58pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Diamondflame View Post

I'd call that a lucky break, A.Homme. But you're right, certain female-marketed scents just do not go with some women. Likewise certain fragrance with strongly masculine profiles do not match some men. And I think it is this sort of 'intuition' about a fragrance's wearability factor that makes one fragrance-savvy. So congrats!

Thanks.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emlynevermore View Post

My first "female" scent also came about inadvertently. I was looking for a distinguished, slightly animalic oriental scent and it just happened that Shalimar EdP was loads better than any of the other stuff I tried.

Besides, what's in a name, really? They are all silly to some extent, independent of the sex to which they are marketed. Unless it's called "Menstruation pour Femme" or something, I think a simple "it's better than the men's version" will nip any further inquiries in the bud.

And this is what's obvious to me now: It's mainly marketing. While the perfumer may have one sex or the other in mind when designing a frag, it's the marketeers that make the final decision, whether it goes in the men's section, or the women's. Unlike (most) shoes and the like, where it's pretty obvious.
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post #26 of 33
7/30/10 at 9:36pm
For me, it's mostly about notes, as well as quality of construction (including "blending") and ingredients. LT talked of the major gender distinction being top notes, though I'd add that "women's" frags tend to be "softer," even when the drydowns are nearly identical, note-wise. An excellent example is JHL, which is basically a slightly harsher version of a "old time" woman's frag.
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post #27 of 33
7/31/10 at 4:27am
Quote:
Originally Posted by JBL View Post

It's still a no-go zone for me, as I would have to lie when people ask me what I'm wearing. It would be to embarassing to tell them I'm wearing something for females.

For non-Basenoters that would be the same as wearing a G-string.

But I have to admit, I enjoy the quite feminine White Aoud from Montale.
And I would love to try Black Orchid.

I usually wear Black Orchid with a G-string, and sometimes a feather boa also. Then I feel it all goes together quite nicely.
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post #28 of 33
7/31/10 at 6:12am
Quote:
Originally Posted by petruccijc View Post

I usually wear Black Orchid with a G-string, and sometimes a feather boa also. Then I feel it all goes together quite nicely.

Joe, getting a little personal here, huh. Just kidding, I am still LMAO from your comment. I can just picture it.lol
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post #29 of 33
7/31/10 at 6:33am
I have tried to cross that barrier with trying to wear scents made for women buying into the "scents are genderless and wear what you like" but just could not make that leap. For me certain scents like florals are feminine and I just cannot wear them. I know some men can wear Chanel no 5 for example but I just cannot make that leap. I still define fragrances by my perception in what is feminine and what is masculine and I as a man just cannot wear girly scents. But that's just me.
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post #30 of 33
7/31/10 at 6:52am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack Hunter View Post

I have tried to cross that barrier with trying to wear scents made for women buying into the "scents are genderless and wear what you like" but just could not make that leap. For me certain scents like florals are feminine and I just cannot wear them. I know some men can wear Chanel no 5 for example but I just cannot make that leap. I still define fragrances by my perception in what is feminine and what is masculine and I as a man just cannot wear girly scents. But that's just me.

I agree with you on the florals, with the excemption of Rose, as in Black Aoud. To me, that is one of the best frags out there. Also, Black Orchid and White Patchouli are pretty darn good also. However, there many frags that are unisex and could smell great in both genders. Don't sell your self short just because how something has been labeled. It's like a kid not liking a food without even ever tasting it. But first, you have to come to terms with your self. I know many guys here in the south that would not wear a pink shirt just because "it's feminine". There was once this guy about 6'4", 240lbs who worked in construction who got a pink cast on his leg. When I asked him "Are you sure?" He said. My daughter wanted me to get a pink cast, I dare anybody say anything to me about it. I just laughed.
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post #31 of 33
7/31/10 at 7:45am
Don't forget jasmine! Jasmine is pretty unisex to me.

Love the pink cast story.
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post #32 of 33
7/31/10 at 1:46pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by petruccijc View Post

I usually wear Black Orchid with a G-string, and sometimes a feather boa also. Then I feel it all goes together quite nicely.

LOL!

Can we see?
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post #33 of 33
7/31/10 at 10:57pm
Gender in fragrance is almost entirely about marketing. A few squirts of No. 19 does not a tranny make. Although I find the new Old Spice body wash ads, in which the model chastises men to "not smell like a lady" hilarious!
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