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5 star fragrances you cannot abide

post #1 of 43
8/15/10 at 2:29am
Thread Starter 
You know that they're objectively great but you just can't wear them.
Well, if they remind of past traumas
( Your father whipped you with a belt while he wore Patou PH )
I suppose it's understandable.
But what other reasons are there?

I'll limit myself to two fragrances:

L'Air du Desert Marocain: I know it's great but I feel like a surrealist beehive. It would have been perfect for Salvador Dali. Superb construction and incredible longevity.

Grey Flannel: Unlike Brut, which is a cheapo from this era, GF was an elegant violet/citrus combo. I can't wear it, even in minute quantities. I feel like I should be wearing a dark dress shirt, a skinny black tie, and a wannabe Mafioso suit while selling used cars for a living. I even like the smell of this powerhouse!

Hell, I like the smell of both! But these ' objectively ' 5 star frags- are 3 stars for me at most.

And no, no one wearing GF sold me a lemon of a car, nor did anyone wearing LDDM tie me to a stake in the desert and poured honey over my head so red ants would make short work of me.

The sad truth is that I think that there are frags that we all admire, but which do nothing for us.

Ok, I've confessed.
Your turn.

Mario
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post #2 of 43
8/15/10 at 3:38am
All masterpieces imho, none I would wear:

1. Vintage Tabarome
2. Royal Scottish Lavender
3. Bois Du Portugal
4. Hermes Bel Ami
5. Aramis Tuscany
6. Cartier Santos
7. Aramis
8. Frapin 1270
9. Annick Goutal Sables
10. Blenheim Bouquet
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post #3 of 43
8/15/10 at 4:03am
CdG AVIGNON. Unless you're attending a Funeral in wintertime.
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post #4 of 43
8/15/10 at 4:08am
Quote:
Originally Posted by DULLAH View Post

All masterpieces imho, none I would wear:

1. Vintage Tabarome
2. Royal Scottish Lavender
3. Bois Du Portugal
4. Hermes Bel Ami
6. Cartier Santos
9. Annick Goutal Sables
10. Blenheim Bouquet

LOL... I just can't live without any of the above and I wear them down to the marrow.
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post #5 of 43
8/15/10 at 4:12am
Some very popular ones I'm afraid

1. Guerlain Vetiver - worn by a lecherous old uncle who always used to take an unhealthy interest in my sister. Not wild about it anyway. A classic I just can't handle.
2. Ambre Sultan - really tried with this but still cannot rid myself of the unshakeable feeling that I have the leftovers of the previous evenings takeaway wafting up at me.
3. Ungaro III - haven't quite been able to pinpoint what it is this smells like on me but it is downright unpleasant.
4. Rive Gauche - Regularly over-applied by an ex colleague who was an arrogant, chauvanistic moron. Girlfriend hates it, I'm apathetic. A non-starter.
5. Terre de Hermes - Basically just doesn't work for me and I have never really understood the popularity. Great for many, objectively average for me. Shame.
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post #6 of 43
8/15/10 at 4:39am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Killer_Vavoom View Post

LOL... I just can't live without any of the above and I wear them down to the marrow.

LOL Well at least we both agree they are Masterpieces.
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post #7 of 43
8/15/10 at 5:01am
Maybe Kouros , but just because i had bad souvenirs with it ( but i'm going to try again in a few days )
Angel ou all this mess.( A Men, B Men )...too much sugar , too much sugar in everything
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post #8 of 43
8/15/10 at 5:20am
Rive Gauche
GIT or Cool Water (make me gag)
Azzaro ph
Egoiste (loved by many, but I smell honey and mosquito repellent)
Avignon (I don't see any beauty whatsoever)
Aramis (for some reason it makes me think of drunk old men)
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post #9 of 43
8/15/10 at 5:47am
+ 1 Egoiste.
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post #10 of 43
8/15/10 at 6:05am
Oooh, what a SECOND on Terre d'Hermes.
I thought i didnt get it, i tried again, i gave it time, I applied varying amounts, still unbearable.

Guerlain Vetiver (and most other Vetivers for that matter).

Narciso Rodriguez for Him (and most other Violets).
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post #11 of 43
8/15/10 at 6:13am
I'm with Jon Rogers and timaru on Terre d'Hermes and Guerlain Vetiver. I just don't get them.

And Muscs Koublai Khan. The analogies are correct.
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post #12 of 43
8/15/10 at 6:35am
Yatagan, I love this stuff but if I wear it more than once every three months, depression sets in and I have no idea why.
Another that is a great but I can't stand on anyone Chanel No.5, I drove taxis for 6 years and every other woman that got in wearing it was just nasty and unkind; I still have the Pavlovian response, I smell it and want to run away!
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post #13 of 43
8/15/10 at 8:53am
Afaik Terre d'Hermes, Egoiste, Rive Gauge pH or Narcisso Rodriguez for Him rate no higher than 4 stars. But w/e, lets not split hairs.

Guerlain Vetiver ( I don' get it & the vetiver goes fecal on my skin )
Guerlain Heritage ( temperamental on my skin - elegant at times, smells like dirty butt at others)
Creed Vintage Tabarome ( awesome scent but I need to grow a Tom Selleck moustache before I can swing this )
Creed Green Irish Tweed ( either the one I got went bad or it just gives me a headache )
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post #14 of 43
8/15/10 at 9:20am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mario Justiniani View Post

...Your father whipped you with a belt while he wore Patou PH...

That is the reason I got into "scented BDSM", this means I use some of my w'drobe's scents in our group's session - just joking, sorry, I could not help it

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mario Justiniani View Post

Grey Flannel: Unlike Brut, which is a cheapo from this era, GF was an elegant violet/citrus combo. I can't wear it, even in minute quantities. I feel like I should be wearing a dark dress shirt, a skinny black tie, and a wannabe Mafioso suit while selling used cars for a living. I even like the smell of this powerhouse!

I agree with this feeling.

Jazz: the initial fecal note is too obvious. But the mid and base notes are worth the initial off-putting notes.

Plus, in general, the über strong ones and/or the über strong with marked floral notes - Le Mâle, A+Men and flankers, Dior Homme Intense, Insensé, Kouros, Kiehl's Musk, Bogart pH, Joop!, VC&A, etc.

I have to admit this is not due to the notes per se, it is rather a matter of sillage and longevity, two attributes I am fond of. I know I live in a city where strong scents are not considered offensive, but using too much pefume denotes either lack of virilty, unmanlyness, childishness or simple affectation. Plus, the fact that complimenting somene for what they are wearing is uncommon, unless we are talking about a pick-up line.
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post #15 of 43
8/15/10 at 10:59am
Penhaligons Hammam Bouquet
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post #16 of 43
8/15/10 at 11:04am
There's so many fragrances out there that are supposed to be amazing but i find to be mediocre...then again i've got the olfactory sweet tooth of a 5 year old kid raised on cake and chocolate bars so anything not vanilla or sweet i find mediocre. Of course there's exceptions (Fahrenheit)

I'm gunna get sh** for these but it's just my opinion..

E-ROFL-A errr... EROLFA I don't mind the smell, it's actually pleasant (minus the heart of darkness, that smells absolutely aweful to me) but i don't get the hype...it's just another aquatic cept with a jacked up price tag. Even the longevity on me was great (which counts for alot imo) but i simply did not like it

Kouros now this one i straight up don't get. It gave me the symptoms often found on medicine bottles just from its smell. On my skin it's just a cloying urinal cake smell, I understand the whole skin chemistry thing but holy Kouros did this thing reek bad. Why many consider it a 5-star i'll never know

Pure Malt "WHAAAT?! but you love A*Men!" damn right i love A*Men, i'd give it 6/5 stars if i could. Pure Malt is an entirely different beast to me though. It's got A*Men's vibe but on my skin it's missing the gourmand notes. I've seen gazillions of reviewers say "it's A*Men but better". If i had a bottle, i'd wear it alot, i honestly enjoy the smell, but something about it doesn't "fit" with me like A*Men. Maybe its the whiskey peat note that i find dominates everything else (even the patchouli!) that makes me go "eh...." but i just don't get why its like this Holy Grail of designer perfumes. Yeah its more wearable than A*Men to most people, i do see that side, but I was not absolutely blown away by it like A*Men.
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post #17 of 43
8/15/10 at 11:43am
Quote:
Originally Posted by dacha View Post

Another that is a great but I can't stand on anyone Chanel No.5, I drove taxis for 6 years and every other woman that got in wearing it was just nasty and unkind; I still have the Pavlovian response, I smell it and want to run away!

Too funny! I've always thought No. 5 had an aura of arrogance to it- here's supporting evidence.

Agree with LucasKane and JonB about Avignon
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post #18 of 43
8/15/10 at 11:43am
I'd have to say that DULLAH's list would be identical to mine.
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post #19 of 43
8/15/10 at 12:55pm
Givenchy Gentleman
Chanel - Egoiste
Estee Lauder - Beyond Paradise (women's and men's)
ELdO - Secretions Magnifique (not widely admired, but awarded five stars by Turin)
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post #20 of 43
8/15/10 at 2:19pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by JON RODGERS View Post

Some very popular ones I'm afraid

5. Terre de Hermes - Basically just doesn't work for me and I have never really understood the popularity. Great for many, objectively average for me. Shame.

Well, you're not alone. I can't call it a masterpiece I can't wear, but rather a very popular and critically acclaimed frag whose appeal I don't understand. If I've given it several tries (and I have) it's because I tended to forget what the hell it smelled like.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DULLAH View Post

LOL Well at least we both agree they are Masterpieces.

+3

BTW, when it came out in the 60's Aramis was considered 'refined' among the college crowd. Not a difficult feat since those of us who dropped out or were expelled were tripping on patchouli or musk.
A decade or so later and the open shirt gold chained crowd re-discovered it as an upscale Brut.

( If these folks are still wearing it, I really get Jon B's "two old drunks" reference )

OK skip a decade and with the advent of aqua/unisex frags, Aramis -like most leather chypres becomes macho to the public. Poor, refined, Aramis. You succeeded too well.
A masterpiece indeed but easily recognizable from 100 feet away.-- I can't wear this either!

And while I really like Vintage Tab and Penhaligon's BB I bow before Diamondflame's verdict

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diamondflame View Post


Creed Vintage Tabarome ( awesome scent but I need to grow a Tom Selleck moustache before I can swing this )



(Naw, I just need the Savile Row suit; or in a pinch a raw silk pseudo-military style sports shirt )
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post #21 of 43
8/15/10 at 2:26pm
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Fahrenheit. So many ppl love the juice, I can't stand it.

Platinum Egoiste - on my skin this becomes something acrid, unbearable, caustic - evil and vile!
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post #22 of 43
8/15/10 at 2:49pm
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Kouros
Habit Rouge
Vetiver (Guerlain)
BdP
Vintage Tab
Givenchy Vetyver
Aramis
Aramis 900
Devin
MI
Azzaro PH
Polo Green
Himalaya
Cool Water
L'dDM
Rose 31
Black Aoud
Ambre Sultan


I could probably go on...
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post #23 of 43
8/15/10 at 6:34pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by knit_at_nite View Post

Too funny! I've always thought No. 5 had an aura of arrogance to it- here's supporting evidence.

Agree with LucasKane and JonB about Avignon

For me No.5 is one of those perfumes that drive poeple away from perfume, not because it isn't a great scent but in my very humble opinion it's marketed as something that it isn't. It really doesn't invite you in, nor is it seductive, nor is it sexy, try Bal a Versailles or Musc Ravageur for that. For me No.5 should be an office scent, very lightly applied. Cold, proffessional and take no prisoners.
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post #24 of 43
8/15/10 at 7:50pm
Czech and Speake No. 88
Guerlain Vetiver, although I'm keeping it around for further sampling down the road
Van Cleef and Arpels Pour Homme--interesting stuff, but can't imagine wearing it
Amouage Lyric Man
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post #25 of 43
8/15/10 at 9:06pm
Ambre Sultan
Guerlain Vetiver -- maybe the vintage was much better.
Bois du Portugal
Green Irish Tweed
Cool Water
Patchouli 24
Amouage Gold Man
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post #26 of 43
8/15/10 at 9:19pm
Jicky
Mouchoire de monsieur

The civet ruins it for me.
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post #27 of 43
8/15/10 at 9:21pm
Beyond Paradise Men
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post #28 of 43
8/16/10 at 4:20am
I have been away for months, but fall is coming, and my interest in fragrances is returning.

Very good question Mario. This topic is directly connected to kantian distinction of judgement of beauty and judgement of taste. In this context first one means basically subject understanding objective - or atleast inter-subjective - value in a fragrance. Latter is purely subjective, you like something but are not ready to make a judgement that it's beautiful objectively speaking.

So, some of you guys got the question wrong; it's not about you not liking a scent that is generally appreciated, but about you not liking a fragrance in which you see aesthetic value. In these post-modern days most people don't believe such distinction even exists, since it's all about opinions, and there is nothing more to it. Personally I feel it's extremely important tool, when discussing fragrances.

I'll have to think about my list for a while.
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post #29 of 43
8/16/10 at 5:11am
Jacomo
Balahe
Jovan Musk

These hate my name.
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post #30 of 43
8/16/10 at 7:26am
Dior Homme - Too dense, too wet, too sweet, too present. This fragrance needs to go on Lipitor before its arteries clog.
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post #31 of 43
8/16/10 at 7:37am
Frederic Malle's Gernaium pour Monsieur, Carnal Flower, and anything by Czech & Speake. I get that GpM is well constructed, but the mint note in it is just way too chewing gum/mouth wash-ey. Carnal Flower - there is such thing as too much tuberose, I'm afraid. And as for the C&S frags, the infamous sh*t note overrides the otherwise brilliant compositions. A shame, really.
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post #32 of 43
8/16/10 at 7:52am
all fragrances in my signature
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post #33 of 43
8/16/10 at 7:10pm
OMG. Y'all are gonna lose your union cards over this one. Such shocking confessions. My hair is standing on end.

Oh, and I'm not that wild about Guerlain Vetiver either.
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post #34 of 43
8/16/10 at 8:29pm
1. Vintage Tabarome
2. Chanel No. 5
3. Bois Du Portugal
4. Hermes Bel Ami
5. Aramis Tuscany
6. Cartier Santos
7. Aramis
8. Frapin 1270
9. Annick Goutal Sables
10.Terre d'Hermes

Well, that's a start.
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post #35 of 43
8/16/10 at 8:36pm
Guerlain Vetiver. Keep trying to love it but I don't.

LDDM. In many ways I love this scent. Find it masterfully executed. Have sample worn it. Can't get into it on me. I just can't paint as many visual pictures as Mario about it.
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post #36 of 43
8/16/10 at 10:33pm
I would agree with many of the suggestions given thus far:

Terre d' Hermes - it's nice enough, but the hype doesn't resonate with me. If expectations were lower I might have bought it
Musc Kublai Khan - thought it was pretty vile
Kouros - another that I thought was plain nasty compared to many of the positive reviews I saw

I would also agree with OP original suggestions:

Grey Flannel - blind bought and wanted to like it but just found it kind of unpleasant and terribly outdated
LDDM - more so that I couldn't justify the money on it. I liked it, but didn't love it, and at those prices, can pass without hesitation

Two that I was disappoited in were Guerlain Moucheiur Monsieur and Mitsuko - not that they weren't great scents but that they were so shockingly a non-fit for me when I originally expected they might work

Lastly, just today I received a sample of Amouage Dia.....can tell the quality and it is certain luxurious, but not something I can even see reapplying yet alone buying.
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post #37 of 43
8/17/10 at 12:59am
Venezia Uomo
A*Man
Drakkar Noir
Must De Cartier
Opium
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post #38 of 43
8/18/10 at 9:28pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny_Ludlow View Post

I have been away for months, but fall is coming, and my interest in fragrances is returning.

Very good question Mario. This topic is directly connected to kantian distinction of judgement of beauty and judgement of taste. In this context first one means basically subject understanding objective - or atleast inter-subjective - value in a fragrance. Latter is purely subjective, you like something but are not ready to make a judgement that it's beautiful objectively speaking.

So, some of you guys got the question wrong; it's not about you not liking a scent that is generally appreciated, but about you not liking a fragrance in which you see aesthetic value. In these post-modern days most people don't believe such distinction even exists, since it's all about opinions, and there is nothing more to it. Personally I feel it's extremely important tool, when discussing fragrances.

I'll have to think about my list for a while.

Yep. You got it.
So I cannot add M7 to the list no matter how popular, as I find it as ludicrous as Xeryus Rouge
And cannot add BdP nor Aramis 900 though so many of you love the former and Scentemental praises the latter to the sky-- they simply make me shrug.

On the other hand,
Azzaro PH
Tuscany/Etruscan
Eau des 4 Voleurs
Eua Sauvage
Balenciaga PH

All deserve higher stars from me.
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post #39 of 43
8/18/10 at 10:52pm
The first one that comes to mind is Musc Ravageur - I just can't handle civet.

Which also rules out Habit Rouge.

I think Dior's Eau Noire is a 5-star scent, but it just drives me nuts when I try to wear it. The combination of sweet, spicy, and weird just messes with my brain.
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post #40 of 43
8/20/10 at 11:06pm
Terre d'Hermes
Aramis Havana
Le Male
Chrome Azzaro
Bois d' Portugal
A*Men
Reflection, Amouage (absolutely nightmarish)
Green Irish Tweed: I still haven't made my mind up about it...so I bought a bottle.

Objectively in this case, I interpret as meaning -- what many others think are great -- that just don't work on my skin, conjures up bad memories, etc. I'm sure there are many more if I think about it.
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post #41 of 43
8/20/10 at 11:49pm
Dior Homme
Terre d'Hermes
Le Male
A*Men

Still deciding what I think about Mouchoir de Monsieur...
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post #42 of 43
8/21/10 at 12:10am
L'Heure Bleue
Apres L'Ondee
Ambre Sultan
Songes
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post #43 of 43
8/21/10 at 6:21am
Dior homme
Dior Eau Savage
YSL Kouros
and L'Istant de Guerlain ph
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