Are compliments overrated?

I like getting compliments. I think most people do. Of course this is not why I wear fragrances and it is certainly not why I am a member of Basenotes...but hey, it's icing on the cake, as they say.

Strange but true: Most of the fragrances I receive the most compliments on, are the ones I like the least.

...But compliments make me feel warm and fuzzy inside! However, I don't really care if I get one or not. As long as I smell good, I am happy

Call me a narcassist, but getting compliments is a big plus for me. Perhaps thats a reflection of inner insecurity or something, but it definitely feels good. I do it for a big part myself, as I like the smell myself.

Its like that for most enthusiasts will not have the same reception as non enthusiasts. For example, I drive a pretty rare well regarded Lexus Sports car and I love it, I love the way it looks, drives... the whole package - but ask my girlfriend what she would prefer to see me in, she would probably say a Jeep Grand Cherokee. Thats ok though, I still like my car.

In terms of perfumes, I have some pretty basic appreciations, and typically the really well regarded fragrances don't appeal me.

As far as compliments, I think allot of people (including myself in a sense) fall into the truth mentioned by this little Seinfeld Standup bit:

"Jerry's standup piece.

JERRY: I love it when people are complimented on something they're

wearing and they accept the compliment as if it was about them. "Nice tie." "Well,

thank you. Thank you very much." The compliment is for the tie, it's not for

you, but we take it. That's kind of the job of clothes; to get compliments for

us, because it's very hard to get compliments based on your human

qualities. Right? Let's face it, no matter how nice a person you are, nobody's gonna come

Say "Hey, nice person." It's much easier to be a bastard and just try and

match the colours up."

I hope this post didn't make me look like a self-indulgent and arrogant guy lol...

It seems to me that there is usually a balance between compliments and complaints on my fragrances. Last week, I wore some Harrods by Bond no. 9 (courtesy of Kerosene). The first comment was, "What are you wearing? Cologne usually gives me a headache, and I'm not getting a headache" I then asked her if she thought it smelled good, and she said she liked it. A little while later, another coworker is like, "Did you take a bath in that cologne?" Usually, I don't get any feedback at all. I try not to offend and avoid wearing stuff that I know makes others annoyed. A compliment makes me feel good, but I don't know if I'll necessarily buy the big bottle based on one or two compliments.

well, it depends on what you mean by compliments. there are fragrance that got me a lot of compliments, and there are some that got me a couple, but did make people go wow. I wear fragrances for myself, and those close to me if they enjoy them. I rarely get compliments from strangers and I don't care. I'm not going to make the assumptions there are people out there who wear fragrances, not for the smell itself, or for the idea of panty dropping or being fashionable or whatever, maybe they exist though.

As far as offending people, I found that most people offended by fragrances are usually offended by the idea of "space invading", plus various other assumptions they'd make over that (e.g. is that person thinking he's better than me because he has to cover up his smell, obsessed with fashion bullshits etc...). Yes over application is also the main thing that causes that, for me at least, if someone has a bad perfume, it's just like someone having a bad outfit, I think "oh that's terrible" and move on. Unless it's really over-applied or really bad, and very few fragrances managed to smell bad in light application, I start getting offended.

If I used number of compliments as the sole gauge of what I wore, I would wear nothing but an orange scented hair gel that everyone seemed to compliment me on! Too bad I found it kind of unpleasant and cloying...

Compliments have nothing to do with what I wear. Really. It's what I enjoy.

For me, personally, I couldn't care less if I get compliments or not. I do enjoy the occasional "you smell great" but I don't crave it nor am I bummed when I don't get any attention.

I'll have to be honest..part of the reason I love this hobby is for people to think.."he always smells good." So yes, I love compliments and want them. It isn't a sole reason. I like different scents and want to smell good for myself but I want it to smell good for others too.

I get my colognes for myself, if others like them great, if not that's fine too. My girlfriend likes the vast majority of what I wear, except most chypres.

As I hardly get any compliments , if I get one- sincere or not- I 'll take it for what it is ! I get probably 1 compliment every decade !

I work with all dudes. I wear a different fragrance to work everyday, Why? Because I love wearing different fragrances & smelling good. It's what I enjoy.

There are guys at my work that do tell me I smell good. I also hear the random "What is that smell?" or "Who's wearing cologne?"

Compliments are cool but, I don't look for them or need them.

+1. I'm at roughly the same pace, Mimi.

What he said.

*LOL* So glad I am not alone, Dennard !

I was going to write something here but Mike already articulated what I think about as well as it can be said.

-Slim

Yes compliments are completely overrated . . . and always appreciated!

It's not a good gauge in that if you get no compliments, it doesn't really mean anything. Ceretainly doesn't mean the scent is not good, or that people didn't like it.

They are absolutely of zero interest to me. Negative comments don't bother me much either. First, they're either complimenting or complaining about the scent, not me, and secondly, I wear them modestly and for myself. Now, of course if someone I am around often complains that something is horrible or gives them a headache or that I'm wearing too much, I'd reduce the dose or stop wearing it around them altogether. That's just common courtesy. But scent is like music to me. If you don't like my tastes in either, it is no skin off my back.

I wouldn't know since I have yet to get one in the last two years since i seriously started this hobby.

I'm with you....and Drago from Rocky 4 ""Я одержу победу для себя! Для себя!", "I fight to win, for me! For Me!"

Compliments piss me off. When I get one I'm like 'Don't be sniffin' my air beotch! Keep your nose to yourself!' I wear cologne cause I like it, it makes me feel good. I'm not here for others and to be sniffed at!

This is the same type attitude I see some women get about being dressed sexily or scantily... looks kind of silly don't it.

Pipsta, do you think it's impossible for someone to be wearing a scent solely for their own enjoyment?

I mean, of course I like a compliment as much as anyone else, but I'm just as fine not getting any, and I would never wear a scent that I didn't love just because it got compliments. I don't think it's analogous to dressing sexily because - as far as I can imagine - the only reason for doing so is to boost the ego from the attention one gets. There is nothing inherently pleasing about being dressed well/sexily/scantily except for the reactions and attention it garners. Well, I guess you could argue there is some inherent aesthetic enjoyment to be gained from it, but that would only really hold true if you were constantly looking at yourself in a mirror. I don't need to look in a mirror to smell my fragrance, and my enjoyment of a fragrance is unchanged due to the opinion or feedback of others.

I think you missed the complexity and irony in this bit of satire.

+1 for me too

Nah, I do understand that both will likely get noticed by others (scents less so, perhaps, but they often will), but the motivation behind each can be completely different, thus making it potentially an apples to oranges comparison, and thus my question. Oh well.

Wearing scents with the desire to impart a positive effect on others, and yes, possibly elicit a compliment does not make one a sell-out. It's kind of false choice. Getting a compliment sometimes means something, but usually what it means is the scent you're wearing really fits well with your overall style, chemistry personality and presentation. It doesn't matter if a scent is cheap, designer, niche or homemade-- if you don't get compliments, it could be that the scent, however good, just doesn't work with you. If you do get compliments, it's likely because you wear a certain scent very well.

This is exactly true for me too.

Bvlgari Aqva probably got me the most compliments but that didn't stop me from selling it. I didn't like it much at all.

I like compliments, but I completely agree that wearing fragrance for the explicit purpose of getting compliments is foolish. You are right, what women like is not nearly as quantifiable as the "what women like" threads would have you believe, and thank heavens for that, otherwise it would be a boring world. If you wear fragrance for yourself, the compliments will be a nice bonus.