;D Excellent post!
so no one thinks I'm either clever or funny please note that these facts bear a striking resemblance to ones seen on www.chucknorrisfacts.com.
Since every other thread on the board regards Creed scents these days, I've uncovered the following factoids for your pleasure. *I don't think many of us will be surprised with any of this.....
· Olivier Creed doesn't design fragrances. *The notes assemble themselves out of respect. *
· If you ask Olivier Creed what time it is, he always says,"Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?", he millesime sprays you in the face.
· When Olivier Creed sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Olivier Creed has not had to pay taxes, ever.
· CNN was originally created as the Olivier Creed Network to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking fragrances in real-time.
· Olivier Creed once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress and designing a new Millesime.
· Olivier Creed doesn't churn butter. He millesime sprays the cows and the butter comes straight out.
· Olivier Creed will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Spring Flower.
· Someone once videotaped Olivier Creed getting pissed off. It was called Olivier Creed: Texas Chain Saw Massacre.
· Olivier Creed originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a millesime spraying. When asked about this "glitch"Creed replied, "That's no glitch."
· Olivier Creed once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
· Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Creedtatorship.
· Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Olivier Creed once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate and how to make all natural fragrances.
· Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Olivier Creed.
· Olivier Creed discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Olivier Creed is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Olivier Creed millesime sprayed him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
· Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Olivier gave them a millesime spray to the face.
· There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Olivier Creed has breathed on.
· Olivier Creed once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest Olivier Creed won by 5.
· Olivier Creed was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Olivier's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious millesime related injuries.
· A Olivier Creed-delivered Millesime spraying is the preferred method of execution in 16 states and Bangladesh.
· When Olivier Creed falls in water, Olivier Creed doesn't get wet. Water gets Olivier Creed.
· Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1 OCMS (Olivier Creed Millesime spray)
· If Olivier Creed ever has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.
· Superman once smelled a Millesime. He then cried himself to sleep.
· Olivier Creed doesn't shave; he millesime sprays himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Olivier Creed is Olivier Creed.
· Human cloning is outlawed because if Olivier Creed were cloned, then it would be possible for a Olivier Creed Millesime Spray to meet another Olivier Creed Millesime Spray . Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
· Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a "hole"; Saddam was millesime sprayed in the head by Olivier Creed in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.
Last edited by Paul G; 27th August 2006 at 04:54 PM.
"Millesime related injuries"? F'ing hysterical!!!!!!!!
Founder- Cosa Nosetra
Way to just change chuck norris jokes, and just switch chuck norris with oliver creed. Next time at least think of an originial joke, or at least don't take credit for it.
ammmmm.......I'm pretty sure that almost everyone here would know where these came from seeing the original list was posted on the Basenotes OT Board last week. *Damn, and to think my Basenotes legacy will be forever tainted by the foul stench of plaigarism. *Thanks for pointing that out, Oprah, it's too bad because now my hope for a bookdeal is done. * In the interest of full disclosure I would like to also note that my avatar was neither made by me nor contain my image, the line under the avatar is copyrighted to the Jurassic 5 and the Signature line is from SNL.Originally Posted by mrliberfarb
This was frickin' hilarious! I often wonder if the man has an ego?
D'oh! pretty funny.
Plagiarism be damned, if it gets a laugh, go speed racer!
I did recognize the Chuck Norris connection, who cares.
In fact, what makes the post funny is the connection with Chuck Norris! If someone hasn't visited the CN Facts page, will miss most of the jokes.
Don't be ashamed, Paul, plagiarism rules! ;D
"It is the mark of a brave man to admit defeat, cut his loss and move on." - David Ogilvy
Are you not entertained??? Is this not why you are here??
Lol i like telling people that are pissing me off that they may die a roundhouse kick related death...
ammmmm.......I'm pretty sure that almost everyone here would know where these came from seeing the original list was posted on the Basenotes OT Board last week. *Damn, and to think my Basenotes legacy will be forever tainted by the foul stench of plaigarism.....*[/quote]Originally Posted by Paul G.
Quite to the contrary, you've taken a solid first step to challenging Joe Biden for his Senate seat in 2008. Plenty of time to plan your relocation to Delaware!
BTW, it was classically funny!
Aagain, I think this is funny but I am suprised that people aren't smashing this by saying it belongs in a blog! It was funny and I enjoyed it!
Wha? He is a mod. He can post what he pleases. Please stop trying to censor what people say, just because you don't like WHAT they say.Originally Posted by ikkitosennomusha
How in the WORLD have you come to the position that it belongs in a blog?
amm again not really, i do have to follow the rules myself. grant's really the only ominpotent one in these parts and he is a vengeful king I can assure youWha? *He is a mod. *He can post what he pleases. *
amm, i'm not quite sure what this is about, so let's not start a flame war in here and if your have issues take it private. keep in mind i've been sleeping in my moderatin' jack boots the last few days and have an itchy trigger finger.Please stop trying to censor what people say, just because you don't like WHAT they say.
How in the WORLD have you come to the position that it belongs in a blog
Wha? *He is a mod. *He can post what he pleases. *Please stop trying to censor what people say, just because you don't like WHAT they say.Originally Posted by AtinayBoy
How in the WORLD have you come to the position that it belongs in a blog?[/quote]
....and there he goes again! You have a knack for wanting to start trouble. I think its best to ban you! First, it was a joke, second, its a joke that Paul will understand, and third, its not your buisness to twist the meaning and get all serious. You do realize that Paul means what he says about getting an itchy triger finnger. Can you not take a hint?
Actually I meant that if there was a vindictive response that the the thread would be locked. Anything further and this will be the case.Originally Posted by ikkitosennomusha
Wha? *He is a mod. *He can post what he pleases. *Please stop trying to censor what people say, just because you don't like WHAT they say.Originally Posted by ikkitosennomusha
How in the WORLD have you come to the position that it belongs in a blog?[/quote]
....and there he goes again! You have a knack for wanting to start trouble. I think its best to ban you! First, it was a joke, second, its a joke that Paul will understand, and third, its not your buisness to twist the meaning and get all serious. You do realize that Paul means what he says about getting an itchy triger finnger. Can you not take a hint?[/quote]
Ikko: Look, you say something in here that is inflammatory, how do you expect people to respond? "Wanting to start trouble"? Dude, if starting trouble is speaking out against censorship and so on, I guess I am guilty. However, you have REPEATEDLY chosen to insult me.
You, sir, are a bully. You are TRYING to get me ban, although I have a stellar reputation in here, besides clearly with you and your buddy Octo.
If you want to post "jokes" for people in public, don't get pantytwisted if someone misunderstands, which in this case, I didn't.
Don't try to bully and threaten me into thinking you have some power with the mods, sir.
If you don't like what I say, deal with it. But if you CHOOSE to insult and threaten members in public because your feelings are hurt or you disagree with an opinion, be assured you will be called out on it.
And when you are, be a man and deal with it, and don't cry for someone to be censored because of your insecurity.
Let's see what you have to say now.
Yes, well, don't blame me. I am not the one looking to antagonize someone around every corner.Originally Posted by Paul G.
"The true gentleman is subtly poised between an inner tact and an outer defense." - Thomajan
BOTH OF YOU NEED TO GROW UP. And a 4th one is locked in two days. Sad. DROP IT.
just to refresh both of your memories, not like either care, but here:
#8: Be respectful
Flaming or personal attacks are not allowed or tolerated. Be respectful of others.
Treat people how you wish to be treated.
If someone doesn't have the same views as you, it does not make them a moron.
Members should avoid the use OF CAPS LOCK, using 'leet' speak or using 'u' for you etc.
Do not PM members of the community demanding that they send you a fragrance from their wardrobe.
#10: Stop when you are told
If you are advised to stop a discussion by an administrator or moderator then do so. Threads will be locked should discussion continue after you have been advised otherwise. If you wish to carry on your debate after you have been advised to drop it, please use private email.
Under no circumstances attempt to restart a locked thread.
another little known fact: brevity is the soul of wit
hahahahahahahaha nice. as a fan or chuck norris jokes, i think oliver creed jokes will be the next big hit. well, on basenotes at least.
Right about that, you are. You wont find many Creed reviews or discussion anywhere else on the net. makeupalley.com, nowsmellthis, bois de jasmin, etc etc...no one really discusses Creed much. Basenotes is pretty much the only site where you can find extensive Creed reviews.Originally Posted by Redcomet
THANK YOU, Pall G, for paying homage to one of my favorite houses! Maybe this is JUST the boost they need right now.
And who is YOUR favorite?...............yawn...........
Just imagine Olivier or his son reading this when googling along and finding this. Definitely I would change my name ....
Last edited by dr.creed; 26th August 2006 at 11:56 PM.
Originally Posted by ikkitosennomusha
I enjoyed it muchly as well. And think it belongs here as much as any place else in electro-perfume-land, which at times seems mighty short on humor and wit that does not overmention bodily effluvia and function or else is all bunny wabbits and rainbows and white gloves.
We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give - W. Churchill
- Olivier Creed knows the last digit of pi.
- Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Olivier Creed to millesime spray you...Forty seven times.
- The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was an exhibition game vs. Olivier Creed and his son. Olivier Creed won with a millesime-spray to the face in overtime.
- Olivier Creed is not Politically Correct. He is just Correct. Always.
- They were going to release a Olivier Creed edition of Clue, but the answer always turns out to be "Olivier Creed. In The Library. With a Millesime Spray."
- Olivier Creed has never been accused of murder for the simple fact that his millesime sprays are recognized world-wide as "acts of God."
- Olivier Creed does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Olivier Creed.
- Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Olivier Creed touches turns up at a better price on Ebay..
- Olivier Creed once millesime-sprayed a ten dollar bill into 200 nickels.
- Life is not, in fact, like a box of chocolates. It is more like a box of Olivier Creed, millesime spraying you in the face. And if you receive a box of Olivier Creed, you ALWAYS know what you are going to get.
- There are now five cup sizes at Starbucks: Short, Tall, Grande, Venti, and Olivier Creed.
- Before sliced bread, people used to say "Thats the greatest thing since Olivier Creed". But Creed was displeased by this. So he millesime sprayed a loaf of bread into slices.
- Olivier Creed actually built the stairway to heaven.
- The wind of Olivier Creed's Millesime Spray can be felt from 160 million miles away
- Olivier Creed doesn't have blood. He is filled with millesimes
Last edited by Paul G; 27th August 2006 at 03:00 AM.
[*] One day, Olivier Creed millesime sprayed on his wife. Nine months later, Erwin Creed, heir to the millesime throne, was born.Originally Posted by Paul G
I honestly didn't know it was from the chuck norris jokes. I really thought you were an absolute genius for a second. im slightly dissapointed. but not really! only oliver creed has that kind of genius.Originally Posted by Paul G