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  1. #1

    Default What do you really think of female compliments?

    *Let me elaborate a bit. *There is a well put together guy at my gym that often ends up on the elliptical trainer next to mine. *I would guess him to be in his early to mid 40s...well-groomed...fit. *It occurred to me when I first encountered him that he was a nice looking guy who looked like he had his act together, but he's married and I definitely don't go there. * I have noticed the last couple of times he's been there that he smells amazing. *I mean it, guys....really good! *I always notice scent on men, but I've done so much testing myself that I'm a pretty tough customer. *So I was impressed that this guy made such a great choice and also that he was wearing something I was unfamiliar with. *It occurred to me tell him that he smelled really great and ask what he was wearing, but I chickened out. * It would be an honestly curious platonic comment...but somehow I worried that he would take it as a come-on or be embarrassed. *Oh hell...I don't know.

    *I want to know the truth, fellas. *I know you love to be complimented, but what honestly goes through your head when a woman is bold enough to tell you that you smell good? *Do you secretly think that she wants you or do you take it at face value? *Does it feel awkward? *Give me the straight scoop on this.

  2. #2

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    You'll probably get various replies on this one ... but I often have to try and match the situation with the compliment. *Because ... let's face it sharilstuff ... you women are IMPOSSIBLE to figure out! *I get compliments at work both from female employees and customers (I work in retail) and I rarely think it's a come-on. *Put it this way ... come-ons are usually followed up by a more "in depth" conversation, whether it's about the fragrance or something else. *But just a simple compliment followed by a "thanks" after you tell her ... no, I wouldn't think she "wants" me.

    Anyway ... go ahead and ask him! *I'm dying to hear what fragrance you were so intrigued by since I'm in my mid 40's ... (the well-groomed and fit part are up for debate though)

  3. #3

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Whenever I get a compliment from the other sex, my brain goes "wow" (double wow if it's an unsolicited compliment).

    It doesn't feel awkward to me at all...it's no different from "you look good" or "nice lunch you're having".
    It's really quite pleasant, except for the smell (...)
    -"Mama", My Chemical Romance

  4. #4
    DustB's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    A really good and fair question, Sharil.

    My answer is it could go either way. When it is asked of me by a woman it is rather easy to read her body language and facial expression, and her follow up interest to tell if she wants to keep the conversation going and thereby find out more about me. If she doesn't have that interest in me, and sadly most don't, she usually makes it clear that she's asking for a husband or boyfriend's best interest, or she takes in the information dispassionately, cutting off after the information and compliment are shared.

    In general strangers and not-close acquaintances don't ask though, for exactly the fear you mention. I think that's sad. A half dozen times I've asked a variety of women what scent they're wearing, while praising it, and most of them have been comfortable and happy. The younger ones, were more prone to being freaked out. After that it is easy to just move on, leaving the freaked-out simpleton alone.

    I guess I've gone a bit off your exact question, but I guess my answer is that as much as I'd like to interpret an interest in my fragrance as an interest in me as a person, I don't think they are the same and it is easy for me to keep them separate. If a woman who I really wanted to talk to at length asked about my fragrance I might try to make it clear that there was more to me than the story of that day's fragrance, and that I'd be willing to tell her more, and I might even yak in that direction a little too much, but I'd stop as soon as I'd realize the discomfort level was rising.

    Who knows what your gym guy is going to be like when you ask him, but he might not be inappropriate, might not be a letch, and might be able to handle the question with refreshing candor. Who knows, but one thing that is certain is that you won't have any problem sending the signals about exactly what your fragrance interest is.

    Good luck, and on behalf of all the members here, let me say I'd sure like to know what he's wearing because it is good enough to please an excellent nose among us. You, that is, of course.
    --Chris
    That girl, that bottle, that mattress and me.

  5. #5

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments


    depends on how they asked. you know... other cues and signals, etc. in general, i wouldn't automatically assume it's a come on, but i would think that there's probably a bit of attraction there. especially if she was alone. and no, i would not feel embarassed at all.


    Traveller, there is no path. You make the path as you walk. -- A. Machado

  6. #6

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    No definite answer to that question. The reaction to such an event will depend on the history and education of that person itself. So expect both possibilities.
    « L'odeur de rose, faible, grâce au vent léger d'été qui passe, se mêle aux parfums qu'elle a mis.»
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  7. #7

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Thanks for your honest feedback, guys. *Tell you what: if he wears the scent again, I'll take a little risk and ask him. *I realize I'm rather bold online, but I am pretty low-key in person when it comes to anything that could be seen as flirtatious. *At least when I'm sober...haha *But I'll tell myself that I'm taking one for the Basenotes team and be brave. *If it turns out to be Axe body spray or something super commonplace, I'm going to look like a jerk; but at least it will give everyone a good laugh! *LOL!

  8. #8

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    sharilstuff....I'll bet you'll be surprised when he says its right guard deo....I personally don't wear scent to the gym but some of the deo's smell rather good IMHO.... ;D

  9. #9

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    You better hope he doesn't say Sex Panther either ;D

    Well if he's married, probably not going to be a big deal...although he is wearing a frag or something to the gym which is just pointless in my book. I belive there was a whole thread on this subject and the consensus was no frags at the gym.

  10. #10

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    I love getting complimented, especially by women of course... ;D

    But I rarely see them as a come-on. Only when they keep talking and start giving the suggestion that they're interested will I see it differently. So just ask, and once he says whatever cologne he's wearing, say 'alright, thanks. It smells really good.'

    And that's it. Whatever you do after that is up to you, but that's all you need.

  11. #11

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    No harm in giving a compliment. I enjoy getting complemented on my fragrance! I constantly got complemented on my SMW and GIT this summer and it was refreshing! It lifted me up and made my day to know someone thought I smelled pleasant. I did not take it the wrong way although I can see some people doing so. Try to handle it with a little sensitivity and you should be fine. It is my opinion that most guys would be ok with it while most women would view a guy coming on to her is he said she smelled nice. Go figure.

  12. #12

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    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    My guess is that it depends on the context. If your gym is a "meat market" gym, then there is a chance that it might be perceived to be a come-on line. If it is a dive like the one I used to use, then it might not.

    You can always provide an escape valve and compliment him on the fragrance and then ask what it is so you can get it for your husband.

    Personally I like compliments, but they are pretty rare for me.
    K
    In rotation: YSL PH HC, Bogart Citytower, Fahrenheit, Paco Rabanne PH, Escada Magnetism for Men, Halston 1-12
    Currently wearing: No. 19 by Chanel

  13. #13

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    It's of the "dive" variety, sir. *I could never hang at a meat market gym. *I've tried and it's way too weird. * I like the option of rolling in looking a little frumpy and not really caring, *though I have noticed lately that it makes for better people watching if I spruce up a bit. *Lots of mirrors and there is usually some guy who is WAY too young for me and thinks he's out of view checking me out. *This is good fun for me until it registers for him that I'm 30-something, and then they will often sort of "dismiss" me with their eyes. They never smell good, though...LOL! Maybe I should direct them to the meat market gym just a short distance from there...the hunting is probably alot better.

  14. #14

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    A compliment from one human to another is a good thing. It sure beats the alternative. ;D
    "Ca sent les pieds!"

  15. #15
    teflondog's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    If the guy wears fragrance to the gym, I bet he wears fragrance everywhere else too. I'm sure he's already received many unsolicited compliments so he should be used to it by now. I say go for it.

    Whenever I receive a compliment on my scent by a woman, I always assume that she's asking so that she could buy the scent for her boyfriend/husband. I never take it as a come-on unless she flirts. If it's a straightforward question followed by a courteous "thank you", you should have no worries about sending the wrong signals.

  16. #16

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Haha. *A new member who comes out of the woodwork to insult me. *Unlikely, I'd say. *I am 37 years old and it's a valid question for me and apparently several others who cared to respond kindly. *If you don't think so, why bother to respond at all? *An agenda of being insulting, obviously. *How mature are you that you can't just ignore a thread that you so obviously feel is beneath you? *Give me a break.


    Oh - also of note is the line at the top of Gent's profile which reads "view profile of fuckr" Nice touch. That username wasn't quite subtle enough, eh? What a class act!

  17. #17
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    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Wow, cologne while working out, fresh sweat + a good fragrance = deadly combo.

    In my own experiences and in most cases, females compliment me because they know me, very rarely i get compliments from a stranger. But it did happen. I recall one girl asked me what i was wearing so she could buy her boyfriend a bottle. I didn't know if it was the truth or not, but i still felt flattered. And to tell ya the truth i didn't think she wanted me or liked me or anything like that, i didn't take it that way, i was just flattered because i knew that i must have had a good taste in colognes and somewhat boosted my confidence in general, that was pretty much it. I guess it also depends how you approach a guy, if you approach him casually then i think he wouldn't think so much. I know some females approach guys in a flirty manner in these situations, that's when troubles really start to set in.

  18. #18

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Quote Originally Posted by fuckr
    Oh, Sharil, REALLY! What a question! How old are you? 10, 11...?
    Consider the source. Click on Gent's profile, read previous posts.

  19. #19

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments



    Quote Originally Posted by Gent
    Oh, Sharil, REALLY! What a question! How old are you? 10, 11...?
    pay no attention to this brat, sharilstuff.

    SELF EDIT: now with 90% less hostility.



    Traveller, there is no path. You make the path as you walk. -- A. Machado

  20. #20

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    I'd personally probably be slightly weirded out (but I don't particularly like random people talking to me) but at the same time take it for what it is: a compliment. Probably should wait for the opportune time, however, as asking while he's "in the zone" might not be the best
    The pursuit of philosophy is the hope that there is more to life than we realize. By philosophy, however, we come to realize that in fact there is less to life than previously imagined.

  21. #21

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    I like being complimented on - it's very flattering! I don't see it as a come on either (at least I don't perceive it as one) but I suppose it can a come on if someone wanted it to be.

    The thing is, people around my age (20ish) don't normally give compliments because of their fear that it will seem like a come-on, especially girls. I don't mind complimenting a girl on her fragrance, you can really see the effect that it has on them - especially if they aren't wearing a fragrance (could be shampoo, body wash, etc.).

    Maybe I don't see these compliments as a come on because the only compliments I receive are usually from women that are twice my age ;D

  22. #22

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    When you see this guy next time, ask him what fragrance his wearing because you want to pick up a bottle for your bf,husband,gf,wife,boss,lover on the side,cable guy,brother,sister, etc... * for christmas

    that way he knows your not trying to pick him up.
    Currently wearing: New-York by Nicolaï

  23. #23

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    While I don't wear fragrance for the sole purpose of impressing the opposite sex (otherwise I'd just buy a lifetime supply of AdG), it is nice when the opposite sex finds my fragrance appealing. Then again, a compliment from a guy is also appreciated...maybe not in quite the same way...haha...but still... As far as receiving compliments from females, well, how I perceive them depends largely on who's giving them and the overall context of the situation. Being as I'm single, if I get an unsolicited comment from a female, relatively close to my age, and attractive, then I'm going to be praying that she likes more about me than just my cologne. ;D But, I'm not going to immediately assume she wants to jump my bones because of it.

    As far as "gym guy" goes, I say just go for it!
    Currently wearing: Sunshine Man by Amouage

  24. #24

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    JEEZ ! So what is it already!!?? : lol

  25. #25

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Quote Originally Posted by Veronica
    [quote author=fuckr link=1133898002/0#13 date=1133907791]Oh, Sharil, REALLY! What a question! How old are you? 10, 11...?
    Consider the source. Click on Gent's profile, read previous posts.[/quote]

    Ahh. Now I understand.

    Sharil - Seems to me that all of us love to hear a compliment on our fragrance choice, especially when it is important to us or when we have put thought into it. So tell him he smells good. But, of course there are a million ways to tell someone he smells nice - the art is in choosing one that lets him know that you're not a stalker or interested. But don't let these concerns hold you back from giving a compliment. We are all a little insecure at heart and love to be complimented.

    I have to say, your post made me laugh because I posted a light-hearted but genuinly ranting response a while back to someone who asked what fragrance to wear to the gym. It's one place I hate smelling fragrances on people. So maybe that guy in your gym is the guy I ranted at - in which case my encouraging you to compliment him is some form of kharmic retribution...if you follow me...

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  26. #26

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    I follow you completely on that, Slim. Generally, I would agree with you about spritzing with wild abandon before heading to the gym. This guy is not in that category though...it's just enough to be pleasant and I really don't smell it until he starts heating up. Believe me, if he just completely gased me out of the joint with his cologne cloud of doom, I'd definitely have a different take on it such as, "What in the hell are YOU trying to cover, dude?"

    I will sometimes go to the gym after I've been testing during the day. That's pretty horrible, isn't it? An olfactory patchwork quilt for you sniffing pleasure, folks. I test pretty timidly, though...it's not too bad.

  27. #27

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    I love it!!!!!!That's why I wore fragrance in the first place. Check out my thread on No substitute for Mania Man and check out all the fragrances that I have used since 1985.

    I got the most compliment when I use Mania Man, unanimously, everybody loves it, girls, boys, teens, adults,girlfriends, friends. My bottle is almost empty, asked everyone that I know if I should get another brand? The answer? Another bottle of Mania Man. I love it when girls told me that they can still smell Mania Man on their clothings after being with me when they got home! One time, the mother of one of my girlfriend was putting away a shirt that she wore all day with me, the mother commented, who's scent is this? It's abi's perfume!Then her mother said, "really nice smell!" Thanks Mr. Armani!!!!!!!!!
    Top faves: Aramis Devin,Balenciage PH,Zino Davidoff,Trussardi Uomo,BlackXS,Sybaris,Furyo,HoHangClub,Santos Sport,KriziaSpazio,CarverVetiverDry,GIT,AmberSulta n,TeaForTwo,Dzing.
    My drobe: www.basenotes.net/wardrobe/47

  28. #28

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    Quote Originally Posted by teflondog
    If the guy wears fragrance to the gym, I bet he wears fragrance everywhere else too.
    Hey,you never know..... maybe he's a member of our little corner of the Web...

    Just ask him.
    "I hold it that a little rebellion now and then is a good thing, and as necessary in the political world as storms in the physical...It is a medicine necessary for the sound health of government." - Thomas Jefferson

  29. #29

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    No, I don't feel comfortable at all with a woman asking--I feel great that a woman notices! I don't have a problem complimenting a woman either. I think it's just that you have an "attraction" to him that makes it feel so awkward to ask him. Go ahead, compliment him, but keep it generic beginning with "Hope you don't mind me asking, but...", and everything should be ok.
    *********************



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  30. #30

    Default Re: What do you really think of female compliments

    ciao,
    I think that one woman make to you a compliment on your fragrance it is a implicit compliment on your allure;beacuse when they want make a compliment on your person they are looking for somethig nice that maybe for expemple your watch, your shirt ,your shoes, your fragrance of course, etc..at last for my experience many time when a woman tell me : " you smell so good" she declares itself availability.
    sorry for my very bad english




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