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  1. #1

    Default Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    Apparently, KISS has a perfume. Or, to be more precise, TWO perfumes. And I know this because my boyfriend thought it would be high-larious to buy the dudes' version for me. Here's the blurb, from a website:

    "KISS Him begins with top notes of bergamot, white pepper, anise and black cumin over mid notes of lavender, cypress, dark rum and fir balsam. The scent closes on masculine base notes of sandalwood, tonka, moss and honeyed amber crystals."

    Get that? MASCULINE base-notes. I hope you like that word, because it is ALL OVER the packaging. Kiss wants you to know that you are NOT A SISSY for wearing their perfume, because honeyed amber crystals are VERY MASCULINE. Yes, KISS wear lipstick and eyeliner, and yes, the name of the fragrance is "Kiss Him," which is ever-so-slightly homoerotic, but you don't need to worry about that, because when you wear the stuff, people are going to take one whiff of those manly tonka beans and know that YOU ARE NOT A GIRL.

    So, how does it smell? Kind of like my dad. And he smelled like Brut, Kools, and old leather jacket. It's very trashy, very 80s, but sort of comforting.

    The girl's fragrance supposedly smells of "top notes of apple-tini, wet fig leaves, racy bull accord and red peppercorns followed by middle notes of red poppy, black orchid, sueded frangipani petals and calla lily. Base notes of amber crystals, musky bare skin accord, patent leather and mahogany give the scent a sensual finish."

    Bare skin, patent leather, and racy bull accord. Apparently KISS like their lady friends to smell like mad cow. AND it comes in "Lovin' Body Lotion," which will make your skin creamy smooth when you're flashing the stage during "Detroit Rock City." Hot.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    Sounds disgusting. Besides that, Gene Simmons is an abhorrent person if you've ever heard him open his big yapper.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    Quote Originally Posted by djuna
    Bare skin, patent leather, and racy bull accord. Apparently KISS like their lady friends to smell like mad cow. AND it comes in "Lovin' Body Lotion," which will make your skin creamy smooth when you're flashing the stage during "Detroit Rock City." Hot.
    That whole post is hilarious -- kudos for the BF's sense of humor!

  4. #4

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    Quote Originally Posted by djuna
    Apparently, KISS has a perfume. Or, to be more precise, TWO perfumes. ...
    Goodness! Apparently you're not a KISS fan. I am and I'll be buying both those frags regardless of what they smell like. I can't believe KISS didn't do this a long time ago. Gene Simmons is a marketing whore who puts the KISS logo on anything and everything he possibly can. Spencer's probably owes half its business to the sale of KISS products.

    Notice the Him version has Gene's face makeup design and the Her version has Paul Stanley's face makeup design? I've always wondered about Pauls "orientation".

  5. #5
    Overcome By Fumes
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    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    I'm holding out for the civet-based followup, Kiss My A$$.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    :toppie:
    Quote Originally Posted by docluv45
    I'm holding out for the civet-based followup, Kiss My A$$.

  7. #7

    Default I Want To Rock And Roll All Night, And Deodorize Every Day

    MadScientist - I have nothing against KISS, really... my stepdad was a drummer in a metal band, and my Uncle Boozer (he legally changed his name after flunking out of rehab) was a biker who loved the stuff, so I grew up with KISS, Pantera, Metallica, Sabbath, etc. It's nostalgic stuff for me. (I may be the only person in the world who hears "Cherry Pie" on the radio and thinks "aww, so heartwarming.")

    I would argue, though, that a KISS lunchbox won't make you physically ill, whereas KISS Him (with its charming aroma of spilled rum, burning rubber, honey and crotch rot) will do exactly that. (Did I mention that KISS Him also comes in deodorant form? It may be the only deodorant in history that actually makes you smell WORSE.) I'd save my money for the t-shirts if I were you.

  8. #8

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    Gross. That is all.

  9. #9

    Talking Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    docluv45, that is truly funny. Now I know why I check in here everyday. The perfumes great, but the humor's even better.

  10. #10

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    I just got a chance to try this one, and what's interesting is that the perfumer did what I have yet to do, but have wanted to, which is something like adding a little Kouros to a lot of vanilla extract. I have a feeling I still wouldn't like it (but if anyone wants to send me a sample, I'll be happy to give it a shot). The reason is that I don't like the honey and civet. With KISS Him, however, there's only strong lavender that makes it smell a bit "old," but the cumin is also strong, as is the sweet stuff. Sometimes it almost smells like a minty toothpaste. It's not bad, and I suspect that many who have tried it and hated it sprayed several times per wearing, rather than once or twice. I'm not sure if I need to keep the 100 ml bottle, mainly because I don't like lavender, but if you know your notes, you should have some idea about whether this is for you or not.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    I'll pass.....No thanks.....
    GHary

  12. #12

    Default Re: Who wants to smell like Gene Simmons?

    I saw this at a Wal-Mart...
    "No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this." Desert Rose by Sting and Cheb Mami, Album 1999.

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