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  1. #1
    Basteri's Avatar
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    Default Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Holy smoke.... I was reading all your reviews and it was interesting.
    Is there any other fragrance with so many negative votes? (in proportion).
    I have to admit some of your comments are amusing, brilliant and creative.
    I need to try this one!

    Total votes : 34
    Negative: 22
    Neutral : 4
    Possitive: 8

    http://www.basenotes.net/ID26127053/reviews.html
    The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    That fragrance is nearly unwearable to a lot of people. But the company that makes it really makes a lot of edgy fragrances - though that one I find to be the one that takes the greatest chances.

    For me, I get nauseous when I tried it - but there are a LOT of threads on this one so you can read them and decide if you'd like to get a sample and find out how it wears.
    ===
    “… [I] recall thinking that the computer would never advance much further than this. Call me naïve, but I seemed to have underestimated the universal desire to sit in a hard plastic chair and stare at a screen until your eyes cross.” ~ David Sedaris

  3. #3

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Reminds me of a party where someone threw her barf over me. Though that might have been less bad than Secretions Magnefique.
    Last edited by Stereotomy; 19th February 2009 at 04:34 PM.
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  4. #4

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    My sample will be here TODAY! It completes my ELDO sample collection. While some ELDO's are edgy, many are just simple, high-quality fragrances. Turin's description of the house 'taking traditional accords and twisting them 90 degrees' is very apt. I just bought by first bottle - Noel Au Balcon, and I hope to pick up a few more. For high-quality niche, their prices are pretty good! ($65/50ml for most)

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    SM is vile but Jasmin et Cigarette and Delicious Closet Queen are divine!
    The Candy Perfume Boy:One boy's obsession with perfume and all things smelly.

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  6. #6
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    There was an article on Basenotes titled "Sniffing the good, the bad and the glandular with the fragrance critic of the New York Times" (see: http://www.basenotes.net/articles/20...dler-burr.html) with following quote:

    A quick whiff is all that’s needed for the next scent. A bathroom in coach on a crowded trans-Atlantic flight to Frankfurt comes to mind. The name is Secretions Magnifique – magnificent secretions. It is the smell of body fluids. Mucus, semen and blood to be precise. It is not meant to be worn or really even purchased. It is a cultural statement by art house Etat Libre d’Orange.
    Currently wearing: Augusto by Mazzolari

  7. #7

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    It smells like a sex crime.

  8. #8

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    this fragrance is the most disgusting fragrance i've ever smelled. i can't be within a 2 mile radius of it for fear of throwing up all over myself (which would probably smell better than the fragrance)

    what's next? someone wiping their butt and bottling it?
    Last edited by union1411; 19th February 2009 at 06:59 PM.

  9. #9

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    some of these reviews are straight up vulgar.


    theres no way it can ACTUALLY smell like bodily fluids. Nasty, yes. Semen? Get real
    Last edited by DerangedGoose; 19th February 2009 at 07:16 PM.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    For those that say it can't smell like what the people in the reviews are claiming, you guys should pony up for a sample. For me, however, I will gladly stay far far away.

  11. #11

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Again, my sample's on it's way. I've never been more curious to try a fragrance.

    Many ELDO's received strongly worded reviews. I only found one of them - Putain de Palaces - to be unpleasant. For example, people were saying Vraie Blond smelled like 'champagne vomit'. It's just an aldehydic peach/floral. That's it. Nothing gross. Not a big deal. If you smelled it blind without knowing what it was or reading any reviews you'd think of it as entirely tame. What seems to happen is one person makes a vulgar analogy, it frames everyone else's reference point, and then they continue the analogy by spinning it to suit their own sense of humor. Same thing happened with MKK reviews, which but for a few fleeting strong topnotes is a fairly tame fragrance.

    As a general matter it would be nice to avoid yet another thread of vulgarities, but I don't see that happening.

    Can't wait for my sample to see what all the fuss is about.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by bbBD View Post

    Can't wait for my sample
    i will pray for you

    keep a bucket handy nearby

  13. #13

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    When people smell like that (SM) they wash!

  14. #14
    Renato's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    When you do finally try it, make sure you try it on paper in the first instance.

    If you want to test it on your skin, make sure you have some scouring bathroom cleaner available. The soap in men's rooms is inadequate to get it off.
    Renato

  15. #15
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by DerangedGoose View Post
    ...
    theres no way it can ACTUALLY smell like bodily fluids. Nasty, yes. Semen? Get real
    No, it doesn't.

    I've said it before, and I'll say it again: mine smells better.

  16. #16

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    I like most of ELDO's fragrances - some are off the wall, and they are at the heart they are solid constructions, but the accords are a bit off or unusual.

    I like Elegy for the Traitor and Jasmine and Cigarettes (sorry about the translations, but I remember the English words for the French). Not crazy about Incense and Bubblegum, but it is interesting. But all of them are interesting, and can be wearable, but you have to be fairly confident.

    Except SM. My reaction to SM was nausea. And scrubbing. They really do use a note in there that turns my stomach, and once scrubbed the base note left on the skin is the thing that gets to me so it's really that bad. Luca Turin called it a "bilge note" and named the chemical used - which is noted for the smell of sewage-like things, so this isn't a case of suggestion. It really is there. And like many scents there will be people more and less sensitive to it. Not wanting to go out and mix real secretions and compare it to the scent, I won't vouch for "accuracy" but I will vouch for "Yuck."

    So ... really ... get a sample, and post your comments.
    ===
    “… [I] recall thinking that the computer would never advance much further than this. Call me naïve, but I seemed to have underestimated the universal desire to sit in a hard plastic chair and stare at a screen until your eyes cross.” ~ David Sedaris

  17. #17

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    SM is said (by the promos) to have all these sexy, bodily conotations. To me it smells like a bowl where you've whipped eggs and washed with hot water and no soap. What's sexy in that?
    In fact I have found a household cleaning product that possibly has a taken a cue from SM. It is one of those things you stick in the toilet bowl and it perfumes the water as you flush. It's a fancy one, by Allesi design group and looks like a geometrical surfer on a surf board, quite funky and fun. Well this toilet perfuming "thing" oozes with an ozonic note very close to SM.
    Put the badly washed egg and the ozonic note together. That's SM. Sexy?

  18. #18

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Sample did not arrive yesterday. Hopefully today.

    Can't wait

  19. #19

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by bbBD View Post

    Can't wait
    yes you can

  20. #20

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by union1411 View Post
    yes you can
    or you should....
    don't plan anything social for a good 3 hours after applying....
    Seriously, the rest of the line is very interesting, and even if SM is just a statement, not a scent, it is welcome

  21. #21
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by libertine View Post
    SM is vile but Jasmin et Cigarette and Delicious Closet Queen are divine!
    Jasmin et Cigarette is nice, but I detect heaps of jasmin but no cigarettes. Do you detect any cigarettes in it?
    Renato

  22. #22

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    To my nose Jasmine et Cigarette has a very distinctive tobacco note that melds with the jamine. It's similar to the 'sweet' note that melds with the incense in Encens et Bubblegum. Both are on my ELDO wish list, which is unfortunately about 8 bottles long.

  23. #23
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    To inject some sense of proportion into this exchange, I'd like to note that while Secretions Magnifiques smells lousy, it doesn't necessarily smell lousy in an exciting, provocative sort of way. (Etat Libre d'Orange can only wish.) It smells lousy in a dull, industrial chemical, windshield wiper fluid sort of way. At once repellent and boring. A landmark achievement in the art of perfumery!
    Last edited by Off-Scenter; 20th February 2009 at 08:36 PM.

  24. #24

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    SM doesn't smell like semen, but it certainly suggests the smell of semen. Clearly, this was the intention of its creators. (the cartoony ejaculating penis marketing artwork makes this embarrassingly obvious)

    ...but semen smells better then SM.

    To me, SM smells like protein--like raw egg whites. It's really hard to wash off, too.

    Why anyone would want to smell like this is beyond me.

    I appreciate the suggestion (sorry I don't remember who to credit for this, and I'm paraphrasing besides) that it wasn't really meant to be worn, but was really more of a bold socio-marketing statement/joke.

    Also Tania Sanchez: "it calls the bluff of every boring floral that claimed to smell of sex".

    That pretty much nails it.

    I'm glad I had the opportunity to smell it, but I don't want it anywhere near me ever again. Having said that, I'd glad someone's out there doing iconoclastic stuff like this.

    I rate it 5 stars for being interesting and ballsy...and zero stars for the actual scent aesthetic.
    Last edited by andylama; 20th February 2009 at 07:35 PM.

  25. #25

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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    OK FOLKS... my sample arrived. Part of me was hoping that this was all a lot of fluff and it wasn't that bad, as I've found with my ELDO reviews as well as MKK.

    WELL.... it is FOUL. Foul-foul. SUPER-foul.... profoundly unpleasant. I hope this was released as a joke or as some sort of artistic statement because if not, someone should be fired. I'd love to see ELDO's balance sheet on this one "well, we sold three bottles worldwide this year - one to TPC, one to someone who has every other ELDO fragrance, and the other to a pervert who liked the ejaculating penis graphic." I have a question - where do all the unsold bottles go and what do they do with them?

    I don't know what it smells like - I don't think it's semen - because this is much more foul, but to play "what's the first smell that comes to mind" came, the answer is "bile". It actually triggers my gag reflex.

    However, you'll all be pleased to know that I have found a use for Secretions Magnifique - take a vial and go to someone you don't like, perhaps a boss or annoying co-worker, and spill the vial onto some sort of fabric i.e. their chair or perhaps their cubicle wall. I see endless uses for SM in gag scenarios. I would find anyone who willingly uses this as an SOTD as deeply troubled.

  26. #26
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Welcome to the club bbBD! Perhaps we should commission an "I Survived Secretions Magnifiques" T-shirt.

  27. #27

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    SM is the only fragrance i have absolutely no desire whatsoever to sample....ever! I almost get nauseous just imagining what it smells like.

  28. #28
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by bbBD View Post
    OK FOLKS... my sample arrived. Part of me was hoping that this was all a lot of fluff and it wasn't that bad, as I've found with my ELDO reviews as well as MKK.

    WELL.... it is FOUL. Foul-foul. SUPER-foul.... profoundly unpleasant. I hope this was released as a joke or as some sort of artistic statement because if not, someone should be fired. I'd love to see ELDO's balance sheet on this one "well, we sold three bottles worldwide this year - one to TPC, one to someone who has every other ELDO fragrance, and the other to a pervert who liked the ejaculating penis graphic." I have a question - where do all the unsold bottles go and what do they do with them?

    I don't know what it smells like - I don't think it's semen - because this is much more foul, but to play "what's the first smell that comes to mind" came, the answer is "bile". It actually triggers my gag reflex.

    However, you'll all be pleased to know that I have found a use for Secretions Magnifique - take a vial and go to someone you don't like, perhaps a boss or annoying co-worker, and spill the vial onto some sort of fabric i.e. their chair or perhaps their cubicle wall. I see endless uses for SM in gag scenarios. I would find anyone who willingly uses this as an SOTD as deeply troubled.
    I think that's a very restrained and lenient description you've given - bile isn't anywhere near as bad as this stuff is.
    Renato
    Last edited by Renato; 21st February 2009 at 04:20 AM.

  29. #29

    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    It's probably due to the concentration of the juice. I remember a few months ago I visited elder relatives. Their dog had the runs, and it got all over his rear end. They tried to wipe it off with wet paper towels but the room smelled like really rotten fish, along with the fecal smell. The smell was awful, of course, but I'll bet SM is worse because of the concentration of the offending molecules.

  30. #30
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    Default Re: Sécrétions Magnifiques

    Quote Originally Posted by bbBD View Post

    I don't know what it smells like - I don't think it's semen - because this is much more foul, but to play "what's the first smell that comes to mind" came, the answer is "bile". It actually triggers my gag reflex.

    However, you'll all be pleased to know that I have found a use for Secretions Magnifique - take a vial and go to someone you don't like, perhaps a boss or annoying co-worker, and spill the vial onto some sort of fabric i.e. their chair or perhaps their cubicle wall. I see endless uses for SM in gag scenarios. I would find anyone who willingly uses this as an SOTD as deeply troubled.
    I'm glad you made it out Okay Good on you for trying this fragrance. I think the idea of using this against someone is hilarious and oh so tempting.

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