The scent-with-vanilla that I have my mind on today is niche, but I figure no harm in posting: Parfumerie Generale Cadjmere.
Not cloyingly sweet; not a teenager's scent. Lots of wood to cut down on the gourmand factor. None of that "plasticy" scent that's so often part of vanilla scents. You'll see coconut in the listed notes but at least on me, it's not actually recognizable as such.
Samples and bottles available from LuckyScent. I'm struggling at this very moment to keep myself from ordering a full bottle based on one wearing.
Edited to add: Forgot to comment on sillage and longevity. My 1ml sample was too small to evaluate either with confidence, but it did seem fairly "shy" on sillage.