Wow! This is great, you have a lot accomplished! In such a short time!
Good Morning Mr. Metro Man. Your mission should you choose to accept it is to catch the 6:10AM flight to Chicago. There you will meet our local agent Ubuandibeme. The meet will take place approximately 9:30 local time in the lobby of the Sofitel Hotel. The local shopping establishments open 30 minutes later. The objective is to reconnoiter three establishments and report back on your results. You will only have three hours to complete this mission as Agent Ubu will be needed to continue Operation 21st Birthday for the rest of the weekend. As always if you are captured or your credit cards are refused the Secretary will disavow all knowledge of your existence. This crystal flacon will self-destruct in 30 seconds.
Mr. Secretary please find the report from my latest mission.
I successfully found Agent Ubuandibeme at the appointed hour in the appointed place. The exchange of samples confirmed our identification protocols. Her extensive local knowledge immediately came to use as our first target Neiman-Marcus was not open and we quickly expanded the mission parameters to include the nearby Macy’s. It was rapidly determined that there was little of current interest to be found on those counters. The enemy SA’s seemed most interested in pushing the new D&G Collection. As soon as we flashed our superior knowledge they stood watching us warily from behind their glass-cased barricades. Agent Ubu suggested a tactical retreat and I agreed. At this point the original target was open for business. Our first bit of reconnaissance centered on the Tom Ford Private Blends, specifically the new White Musk Collection. It was our considered opinion that White Suede was the best of the bunch and Pure Musk does not entirely live up to its name. We then moved to one of the high value targets, the Maison Francis Kurkdjian collection. Seven new scents from M. Kurkdjian plus interesting fragrance add-ons like scented bubbles for blowing, incense papers, fragrant leather and silver bracelets, and laundry detergent! Clearly this Kurkdjian fellow is trying to expand the fragrance mission parameters beyond their normally accepted boundaries. I propose continued close surveillance. The seven fragrances are all interesting but the clear winner for both Agent Ubu and myself was Cologne Pour Le Soir. We found it to be an incense of a special composition. I found both the pour Homme and pour Femme versions of Lumiere Noire to be excellent but Agent Ubu was initially taken by the pour Femme until she initiated skin contact and it didn’t perform to her standards. We then moved around the edge of the case to find another high desire target Viktor & Rolf Eau Mega. It was deemed unworthy of further study after the first sniff. During this period a new SA approached with Acqua di Parma Profumo. I knew the danger this presented as it had smitten Agent Pomander during the Boston Meet-Up Mission. I warned Agent Ubu but she took the risk and was smitten, also. The crafty SA lured her with a smaller size and her resolve wavered. It was time to head to our second target Saks Fifth Avenue. I had been supplied with a Friends & Family 10% discount pass to ease our insertion into the target. We first approached the Jo Malone counter and Agent Ubu tried Black Vetyver Café, Vanilla & Anise, and Dark Amber & Ginger Lily. I gave her a pass to obtain a sample of Estee Lauder Jasmine White Moss but they had hidden the target so it couldn’t be found. It will be up to Agent Ubu to acquire this on her own, without back-up. We next approached the Bond No. 9 counter here we were met with condescension and indifference. We used our Agency honed skills of superior knowledge and ability to laugh at misplaced hauteur to leave this snooty SA gaping. We now encountered the same White Musk Collection we had surveilled at Neiman-Marcus. The ability to wield the 10% discount weapon encouraged us to acquire a bottle of White Suede. This came accompanied by samples of the other members of the Collection plus six other Private Blend samples. Time was running short but Agent Ubu had to go back and order Dark Amber & Ginger Lily; the 10% Discount Weapon was exerting a mighty influence, indeed. Back out in the sunshine we walked rapidly towards out last target while Agent Ubu arranged for extraction to where Operation 21st Birthday would be taking place. We entered the new Barney’s which had amusing displays for Paul Smith with Union Jacks and a floor covered in Twinings tea bags; adjacent to a Prada display with the Italian Tri-Color and raw spaghetti noodles on the floor. We entered and went downstairs to the final target. Our first stop was the Le Labo counter where the SA confirmed our previous intel that all of the city exclusives will be available for the month of November; 25 bottles of each per perfume per store. The SA was wearing Vanille 44. Agent Ubu acquired Ambrette 9. While her perfume was being prepared we moved down to sniff the new Serge Lutens Musks Koublai Khan. Agent Ubu had run out of space on her arms and sprayed it into her palm. This proved to be an error in judgment as her dislike for this scent was strong and emergency alcohol wipes were needed to scour the offending scent off. We then moved to the Frederic Malle corner and in conjunction with the SA the travel sprays of French Lover/Bois D’Orage were acquired. Our time was rapidly running out and we needed to caffeinate before Agent Ubu’s extraction. Our final exchange of intel went smoothly and I left Agent Ubu in the appointed parking garage trusting in her current team to successfully extract her. On a personal note I found Agent Ubu to be a delightful companion and would happily go on another mission with her in the future. Perhaps she could join the Boston Mission Team next summer. I will now return to my cover of mild-mannered scientist until I am needed again.
End of Report.
More writing on fragrance by me to be found at http://www.cafleurebon.com/
Wow! This is great, you have a lot accomplished! In such a short time!
Great narrative. Living vicariously through you.
LOL, great report Agent Metro Man!
A fun read! Well done!
I'll be back to read this tomorrow when the antihistimine will have worn off (hopefully) and I can look at it without blurry vision, lol! Looking forward to it!
Wonderful story-telling. Sounds like it was a whirlwind & worthwhile walkabout in the windy city! Even though Eau Mega doesn't seem to be knocking anyone's socks off, I still want to try it for myself.
Last edited by tang; 18th October 2009 at 03:46 AM.
Sniff and let sniff.
Isn't the Profumo fabulous ubu?
I was laughing at the part about the Bond No. 9 SA's. One does need 'Agency honed skills' to deal with them, don't we?
Last edited by mikeperez23; 18th October 2009 at 03:11 AM.
Thanks for the report SMM ! It was a great read !
Petty small minded people have no place in my life.
Mission successful! No car chase?
This had me in absolute stitches, especially the line:
"we needed to caffeinate before Agent Ubu’s extraction"
....which sounds slightly rude for some reason! Apart from all the sniffing opps, I envy SMM's close encounter with Agent Ubu's rectilinear hair embellishments, of which I still retain photographic evidence!
"So many scents, so little skin"...
How brilliant! I wish I could have been there too. I always did think that Agent Ubu looked young, but wow 21! No wonder she had to wait for extraction
Detailed and useful report, agent SMM. Clearly the free world is in good hands. The Secretary commends you both for your initiative -- strictly off-the-record, of course.
"The force that through the green fuse drives the flower // drives my green age..." Dylan Thomas
That was a great report, SMM! Thanks for sharing.
Saturday's mission was one of intrigue and enjoyment! Talk of taking on a potential Boston mission has my ears perked up...a few extra special agents would be needed for THAT one...so, Tang & Quarry ~ start honing your SA schmoozing and sample manipulation skills because East Coast is going to be a tough assignment, one requiring more intensive pre-mission preparations.
SMM, you're writing is fantastic! For those of you who haven't yet had the pleasure of meeting MetroMan in the flesh, let me tell you he is ENERGETIC! This magnetic characteristic took me by suprise....I presumed since he is soooooo smart, ultra-organized, and a complete gentleman
he might have a bit of a low key personality. I couldn't have been more wrong! He is expressive, lively and passionate. A great listener/observer too. Oh yeah, his nose? Top notch! If he says a fragrance is great - trust him, it is!!! The new (highly exclusive) line of Kurkdijian personal scents and fragrant 'play things' are unbelievably fantastic! The Cologne Pour Le Soir is the most gorgeous incence composition ever! As SMM so aptly pointed out during our mission, it possesses a sort of kinship with Bois d'Armenie (Guerlain) - only better! YES BETTER! The bubbles are crazy fun, and the papers for scented smoldering are intoxicating. Seriously, make this fragrance line your own mission - seek it out, it's SO worth smelling. (and don't forget your wallet)
In our never ending discussion of perfumes/perfumery, we also concur ~ you pretty much can't go wrong with any of the Chanel Exclusive line, Tom Ford's Private Blends, or Frederic Malle range of fragrance. All three have turned out the highest quality selections.
Can't let this thread end without making mention of the new L'Artisan Havana Vanille. (Lucky duck that I am, SMM gifted me the last of his pre-release sample ) IMO, it is clearly superior to Guerlains Spirituese Double Vanille & Tom Ford's Tobacco Vanille. Bertrand Douchafour has pulled out all the stops, paid attentions to every detail and subtle nuance of notes, to create this magnificent golden elixir! One spritz, and I was completely FB commited!
Wish I had more than a few hours to spend...and a few more DOLLARS to spend as well! But hey, there's always Boston........
Love you basenoters!
Last edited by ubuandibeme; 18th October 2009 at 03:18 PM.
Sounds like a FUN day! And you both made some outstanding purchases. (Crafty SAs indeed!)
I've trademarked the color bleu
What a fun read! And AWESOME intelligence, too! Both agents SMM and UBU should be up for commendations after this! [Note to my superiors at the Cowtown office of BIA: Boston is sending their operatives across the country and we have to get special permission to set up surveillance on Macy's???!!! Wait until Director Grant hears about THIS! ]
Had to laugh at the failed tactics of the Bond operatives up in Windy City. The ones around here are much smoother and far more dangerous!
Thanks, SMM and UBU - you made my morning!
Fantastic reports, SMM and Ubu! I agree about the White Suede and Profumo, both are wonderful. Congrats on your new treats and enjoy!
"I felt something so intense, I could only express it in a perfume." - Jacques Guerlain
Ubuandibeme and SMM:
Totally enjoyed reading your debriefs. I just love hearing about BNer's meet-ups!
Ubuandibeme - your account of Havana Vanille has me drooling (oh my, that's not a very flattering vision ) and scheming a trip to a perfumery to sample it. Hmmm, sounds like a perfect plan for a rainy New England Day.
I hope the Windy City Perfumista will blow into Boston and "terrorize" the Beantown SA's with us soon!
Last edited by pomander; 18th October 2009 at 04:49 PM.
"You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying about the future."
"Three essentials for a good life: Someone to love, somewhere to go, and something to look forward to."
Love it! Thank you for such a visual post! I felt as if I was right there with you.
Nice description of a great day, but now I'm locked and loaded on some lemmings: Havana Vanille and Cologne pour le Soir.
For sale: JL Scherrer parfum (reduced price) and more!
"One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other." ~ Jane Austen
“Pleasure is the flower that passes; remembrance, the lasting perfume” ~ Jean de Boufflers
Sounds like an absolutely smashing time. Such fun to be had in the windy-city and you both had lots of it.
Quand on boit l'eau, il faut penser à sa source
Ubu, from your description of the effervescent Mr. SMM, I fear I would lose every last shred of reserve. It's probably best you didn't have to put up with two adolescent-like maniacs feeding off each other's arcane Whedonisms--however much I regret missing out on the MI experience.
If I can arrive at the next set of coordinates (longitude 71°, lattitude 42°), I'll wear my Man From U.N.C.L.E. badge.
Last edited by Quarry; 23rd October 2009 at 12:44 AM.
Quarry ~ I'm hoping to get you and Tang onto the Boston mission, summer 2010! We could be "Charlies Angels" (accept I don't care to wear Charlie! ) How about "Chanels Angels"?!?!?!?
Great reads SMM and Ubi! What a day!
"Are you a god?"
"Are you a wizard?"
"Are you a man?"
"Then what are you?"
"I am awake.."