Code of Conduct
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 45
  1. #1

    Default Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Hi all, I'm new to fragrances and just want to ask something to see if I'm the only one who has experienced this. Anyway, I was doing some shopping with friends so I decided to go buy a new fragrance, paco rabanne 1 million.

    So after I bought it they were asking what it was and how much it cost. So after i tell them they were shocked i would spend up to 50 euro on a fragrance. I almost felt they thought it was a stupid hobby, collecting fragrances.

    They were saying they would rather wear Lynx/Axe and that i was wasting my money. I didn't really pay any attention to the comments but has anyone else here recieved the same comments from friends and the like. Sorry if this is long and boring but i'm just curious. Thanks

  2. #2
    Pollux's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    http://goo.gl/1zgdDl
    Posts
    3,867

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Mark, welcome to Base Notes!

    That kind of reaction is quite normal, so my suggestion would be not to talk about your hobby or just do it in the right place, that meaning, among people appreciating it.

    Regarding their preferences, sooner or later they ask you what are you wearing. There are chances they will realize the difference between, say, Axe Musk and YSL's Rive Gauche, and this will be due to your hobby.
    Last edited by Pollux; 3rd January 2010 at 08:00 PM. Reason: Addition

  3. #3

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I sometimes get remarks that fragrance is a waste of money ... I would say going out and spending £100 on drink in an evening was a waste of money . Its all swings and roundabouts

  4. #4

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I get that reaction from my father among other people! Anyway the way I find most appropriate to deal with it is to stir away from tha pricetag issue and if I am asked directly I tell the truth. If they look me the wrong way I give them a talk about how it is impolite to ask the price of things if they are not interested in buying and how I don't ask about and judge the way they spend their money. After all it is money that I have worked hard for and money that I am not depriving anyone from! After a couple of times I gave that talk poeple seem to have gotten the message. And I believe this is a very polite way to tell people to mind their own business...
    If on the other hand you still want to get their approval, you can just tell them that you can sell the stuff that you got tired of on ebay or to fellow BNers who are just as stupid and self-absorbed as yourself
    Last edited by cpk; 3rd January 2010 at 04:04 PM.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I get that ALL the time Mark. For my friends and family, fragrances is just one of my "dysfunctional" hobbies

    Don't let it bother you much.


    PVC and Leather. A Chain and a feather




  6. #6

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Hi Mark,
    Allow me to second Pollux's welcome! You have come to the right place. And I would second my fellow Basenoter's other comments: Voting for something with your pocketbook is a considerable statement. What we spend our money on does indeed set people apart. You wrote that "they would rather wear Lynx/Axe and that i was wasting my money." I like the idea that if you don't wear Lynx/Axe and invest more of your money than they do on different (and/or better) scents, you are actually raising the bar, changing the rules. And your mates may well see that as a challenge. Can they rise to it?
    cheers! tim

  7. #7
    jakekny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Philadelphia PA
    Posts
    110

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    As someone who lives below the national poverty level, people do wonder about my hobby. Granted I haven't bought anything in months - Piguet's Bandit $20 100ml - yet I get so much pleasure each day, I consider the value over the actual cost. Bottles last ages and it's something I get to enjoy day in and day out.

  8. #8
    Cow Tipper Extraordinaire

    kbe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    The Big Blue Marble
    Posts
    20,910
    Blog Entries
    1

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Welcome to Basenotes Mark!

    Nice choice of frag. You are exposing your friends to a new experience and a classy one at that. Be gentle..
    These things cannot be long hidden: the Sun, the Moon, the Truth--Buddha
    Currently wearing: Cumming by Alan Cumming

  9. #9

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I too get the same response.My answer is that its a hobby I enjoy and I leave it at that.

  10. #10
    StylinLA's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA
    Posts
    4,353

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Most people in here get the same kind of guff at some level.

    Welcome aboard. Wear nice scents and let them roll with Axe.
    Last edited by StylinLA; 3rd January 2010 at 09:30 PM.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I agree with jakekny. Think about how much pleasure it gives you. It's a harmless hobby that brings a simple joy. People collect all kinds of things. When one collects and uses fragrances, you can enjoy this hobby wherever you go. You can't say that about most collectibles.

    Other people may or may not "get it." What matters is what it means to YOU.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Wow thanks for the welcome, I'm glad I'm not the only one who has experienced this. I think I will take all of your advice and just explore my new hobby in private. Thanks

  13. #13

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I guess a lot of people seem to have an inbuilt head for what they think deserves to have money spent on it and what doesn't.
    Tragically a lot of this type of thinking is linked to social acceptance or peer pressure which mostly seems to deem a fragrance hobby as weird.

    Wait till you start trying 'feminine' scents, you'll find you may like some of them and then what?
    Stop buying the scent because you mates might slag you off?

    Welcome to the boards Mark, your fragrance adventure begins here...
    Last edited by Aerandir4; 3rd January 2010 at 05:51 PM.
    "What actions are most excellent? To gladden the heart of human beings, to feed the hungry, to help the afflicted, to lighten the sorrow of the sorrowful, and to remove the sufferings of the injured" Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)

  14. #14

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Don't worry about it. I know plenty people who find it strange to purchase Scents, watches, cars, clothes, booze, ETC. Different strokes I guess

  15. #15

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I must assure you that most of my friends act like this too, as soon as they find out about the amounts spent on my frags
    Currently wearing: Lancetti Uomo by Lancetti

  16. #16

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Welcome aboard!

    I know your issue all to well. What I usually reply with is that a bottle doesn't last just a month or two, but lasts over a year. Fragrances are a long term investment, not a one time thing. I know some of my friends who spend 70$ on shoes and family members who will spend that on alcohol. The point I made is that a 100ml bottle (70$ retail), will last me at least a year. Since I have a small collection and only wear a fragrance if I'm leaving the house, it will last more like 2 years. I'm also not a heavy sprayer. Once I tell them how long they last and why I enjoy them, they'll usually stop talking or change the subject because they know I could say the same thing about their hobbies.

  17. #17
    jdnba's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    New Orleans
    Posts
    1,931

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    some people like wine...others are foodies or stamp collectors or coin collectors, etc..so just remind everyone that its not hurting them, it makes you happy, and hell, even makes you smell better!!
    Current Top 5:

    Tabac, Cardinal, Brookes Brothers, Musc Kublai Khan, Andron

  18. #18
    timaru's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Berlin
    Posts
    2,482
    Blog Entries
    5

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Yeah, at first.
    The friends closer to me were exposed to the frags I wear, got interested and albeit none of them craves a huge collection as I do they as of now do own one or two very decent frags that came around 50€ as well. So no, i dont get much weird looks anymore, if people come to understand why it fascinates me so much.
    My cousin is totally converted by the way, meanwhile he own nearly as many as I do, although no samples...

  19. #19

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Welcome, Mark. I will echo what has already been said. Perfumes are like wines in both price and appreciation. Some people will be happy with what sells to the masses and their tastes. Some will only be happy with the more exotic and refined. And some will spend an untold amount on what makes them happy.

    For a person to spend thousands of dollars, pounds, euros or what-have-you on a wine--people gasp and say that person is a true connoisseur with cash to spare. When someone spends in the three figures on perfume, people gasp and say he is crazy.

    Perfume appreciation still has a long way to go for acceptance in the public eye.
    "No elegance is possible without it...perfume is a part of you." Gabrielle "Coco" Chanel
    Currently wearing: Rose Ambre by Fragonard

  20. #20
    hednic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    McLean, NYC, & Búzios
    Posts
    107,786

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I get that all the time from friends. I pay no attention to them and it doesn't bother me.

  21. #21
    N_Tesla's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Center of the Universe; California.
    Posts
    4,599
    Blog Entries
    2

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Welcome, Mark. The collecting and wearing of fragrance at the level experienced here on Base Notes for the general public is considered eccentric behavior. My suggestion is that you share your fragrance experiences here where there are individuals of similar interest. Anytime you are different from the general population you will be considered a bit odd. As for me, I would rather be eccentric and odd any day as opposed to following the behavior dictates of the herd mentality.
    Last edited by N_Tesla; 3rd January 2010 at 09:08 PM.

  22. #22
    Dependent knit at nite's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    CA, Central Coast
    Posts
    4,950

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    YEP- Of course, these are the same women who routinely buy $300 shoes and $500-$700 designer bags, something I could never do. Everyone is different, don't let your friends sway you from what gives you pleasure.
    Currently wearing: Blu Notte by Bulgari

  23. #23
    Zgb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Zagreb, Croatia
    Posts
    3,634

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Welcome Mark. I never talk to my friends about it, parents patronize me a lot for it. Always screaming about how many of them I have and what is it to me.

    I just love collecting, that's it. Something I keep to myself, not spreading it like it's religion. Hobby is a hobby, thing you enjoy and just and only for you. People and friends sniffing you and asking you what it is, is just a little bonus.
    Last edited by Zgb; 3rd January 2010 at 09:46 PM. Reason: lapsus calami

  24. #24

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    It's a hobby like collecting wine.. but after you open a bottle of wine you have to consume it fairly quickly; with scents you can store them for quite a while if you do it correctly, and consume them slowly over time. I find it to be a much better investment personally than wine.

  25. #25

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    If you get comments like this from Axe users again, say this. A can of Axe costs €3.50 and lasts 3 weeks (the way you have to douse yourself in it to get a smell that lasts). Thats about €60 a year. You buy 4 50ml bottles of fragrance, 2 for summer, 2 for winter. Even with serious overspraying, each bottle will last 4 seasons. Therefore as long as each bottle costs you less that €60, you will spend less than the guy buying Axe, and smell a hell of a lot better than him!

    I have just taught my nephew this truth - he's now buying stuff like 50ml of Paco XS for the price of 3 cans of Axe (or Lynx as its called here).

    Andy
    Last edited by andym72; 3rd January 2010 at 10:31 PM.

  26. #26

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    People rarely know somebody else with this hobby so they seem to find it strange, considering the majority of people have like one bottle of fragrance and stick to it for a while or dont use fragrances at all.

    If you like this hobby keep it up!

  27. #27

    narcus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Königl. Preussen
    Posts
    4,581

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    This is why costs and discussions about my fragrant passion do not bother me at all:
    • Going to the movies costs about $20 here, and that is the cheapest you can feed your soul with. Wait a year to enjoy it on TV, or buy the DVD from second hand.
    • Tickets to music events are never below the value of a pricey perfume. Sports events ...I wouldn't want to know, even!
    • I only wear no name jeans and no name underwear (well, mostly, and pls. don't tell anybody :-)), Nike etc. sportswear?? - That's taboo, except bought at liquidation prices.

    I know what I want from life within the limits life has set for me. And I only have money for perfumes by first waiving other chances to waste it on.
    Last edited by narcus; 5th January 2010 at 11:47 AM.
    'Il mondo dei profumi è un universo senza limiti: una fraganza puo rievocare sensazioni, luoghi, persone o ancora condurre in uno spazio di nuove dimensioni emozionali' L. V.

  28. #28

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    I think a lot of you are missing the main point here.

    The main problem that people (parents/relatives/friends) have with seeing a guy collecting fragrances, is that it's supposedly a female thing, and it's not about the fact that he has a hobby of spending money on some collection.
    If Mark was spending the same amount of money on, for example - stamps, then there will be no issue. Or, if Mark was actually Maria, then there will be no issue. I'm sure that 95% of females here (girls, back me up) has never heard someone tell them that buying more than a few fragrances is a waste of money (the way that people tell us - guys).

    This is the reality, we have to deal with it. I know it's not always easy to have the attitude of "it's my hobby, I don't care what anybody else thinks!" , because deep inside, we as people, tend to look for approval. But hey, it's your own struggle with yourself...nobody can help you.
    The most uplifting thing I can tell you is that you are a member of huge community here, and you're obviously not alone in this hobby.

    Be strong and do what YOU enjoy.

    Good-luck!
    Last edited by Celsius32; 4th January 2010 at 02:32 PM.

  29. #29

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Hi, Mark, and welcome.

    Yes, I spend a lot of money buying the fragrances. Yes, even the people who love me the most do not have much comprehension for my hobby. Yes, a lot of my friends think that my hobby is the waste of money and time. Yes, my behavior concerning the scents does not have any connection with the wisdom. But, when I come home after a long, tedious day at work, and when I apply a bit of L’Air du Désert Marocain or Chergui, I am becoming the happiest person in the whole world.
    Last edited by peevish_yolk; 4th January 2010 at 03:19 PM.
    “As if everyone, all over the world, had his daily visually artistic task; the task of being an image for others.” Peter Handke

  30. #30

    Default Re: Anyone else get this kind of a reaction from friends???

    Thanks for all the replies and positive attitude. Really appreciate it!!

Similar Threads

  1. I turned one of my best friends on to Reaction :)
    By CologneJunkie in forum Male Fragrance Discussion
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 28th December 2008, 11:35 AM
  2. What kind of guy are you anyway?
    By renperd in forum Male Fragrance Discussion
    Replies: 31
    Last Post: 5th February 2008, 05:26 PM
  3. What Kind of Incense?
    By madvillain in forum Male Fragrance Discussion
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 22nd December 2005, 01:57 PM
  4. What Kind of Incense?
    By in forum Male Fragrance Discussion
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 1st January 1970, 01:00 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  



Loving perfume on the Internet since 2000