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View Poll Results: Is it appropriate to Wear a cologne to a Funeral

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  • Yes

    40 78.43%
  • No, Not at all, Just wash up and wear a suit

    11 21.57%
Results 1 to 35 of 35
  1. #1

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    Default Scent for a sad time...

    We have talked about scents for so many happy occasions but what about the more dark dismal occasions... I don't know how else to put it but... What is appropriate to wear for funerals... I probably wouldn't wear one or if i did it would be subtle and soft spoken frag...

    Although in my family we are to look at death as not a sad time but a time to be happy for the one who is moving on...

    I do think that it may be appropriate to wear a cologne at a funeral but i would not know what to wear

  2. #2
    MikeNY's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I try not to wear fragrance during turbulent times. I would not want to create any associations or sense memories. It could bring up those feelings again whenever you put the fragrance on again.

    Your post makes me think of "Black March" from CB/I Hate Perfume. The designer was inspired to create the scent after attending a burial in a Long Island cemetery. It suggests green frozen grass, dirt, and a hint of flowers emerging from the winter thaw. It's amazing but also amazingly melancholy.

  3. #3
    funraiser18's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I was going to ask the same question yesterday, as I had a funeral to attend. I am of the belief that there is a scent for every occasion, so I wore Black Aoud - but I went easy.

  4. #4

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I agree that it could create a sense memory... but it depends on the death... if it is a tragic death of any sort like an accident then i wouldnt wear one...

    But the sense memory could be a good thing... if my mom died i would be wearing a cologne that she liked and it would remind me of her all the time when i wear it... so it could be good thing...

    It depends on how you look at it

  5. #5

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    i have a 1 oz of drakkar noir and the only occasion i can see myself wear it is at a funeral...

  6. #6

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Depends on who died. Someone I don't know and don't care about, I'd rock whatever, just another day. If it was someone I was close with, I don't think I'd be in a mood for any scent.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    You don't go to a funeral to draw attention to yourself, so no, I don't think it's appropriate at all.

  8. #8
    Hob Dobson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Top on such a list would be something the departed enjoyed smelling on you, regardless of what others might think. However, nothing that you know the deceased wore himself or herself, if it can be avoided.

    Otherwise, probably something traditional, somber, quiet.

    Knize Forest - maybe one of the more somber fougeres I've tried
    CdG Kyoto, Hinoki - minimal projection, quietly beautiful


    If the symbolism works for you, BPAL does have an entire Ars Moriendi line. Deep In Earth and Midnight, among others, include notes associated with death or grieving.

    Then again, I might just wear Knize Ten or some other scent I find personally comforting.

  9. #9

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by MassMenace View Post
    You don't go to a funeral to draw attention to yourself, so no, I don't think it's appropriate at all.
    Yea of coarse... but something subtle would be ok... or something the departed liked... like i said if my mom died i would wear one that she liked and use it to remember her

  10. #10

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    What a great way of saying, "I'm here thinking about me."
    Vintage Guerlain, Maître Parfumeur et Gantier, and other rare off-site sales.
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  11. #11

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by strifeknot View Post
    What a great way of saying, "I'm here thinking about me."
    figured this would be said...

  12. #12
    KMF's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I wouldn't wear a scent for the simple reason of having that scent associated with a sad / tragic event in my life... That being said, I don't think it's inappropriate to wear a fragrance to a funeral. Just make sure it's discreet and applied lightly...

  13. #13

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Agreed, discreet and lightly

  14. #14

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by MassMenace View Post
    You don't go to a funeral to draw attention to yourself, so no, I don't think it's appropriate at all.
    Quote Originally Posted by strifeknot View Post
    What a great way of saying, "I'm here thinking about me."
    You guys obviously didn't see the Wedding Crashers.

    "Grief is natures most powerful aphrodisiac".
    Last edited by nsamadi; 19th January 2010 at 03:12 AM.

  15. #15

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Bvlgari Pour Homme Soir

    Dark, somber, and discreet....
    Last edited by Pappy; 19th January 2010 at 03:51 AM.

  16. #16
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Wearing a scent is like wearing clothing, one wears in good taste what is respectful as an accessory to the total outfit.

  17. #17

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by nsamadi View Post
    You guys obviously didn't see the Wedding Crashers.

    "Grief is natures most powerful aphrodisiac".
    It's funny you say that, because I was thinking of that exact scene when I was typing! :-D

  18. #18
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by N_Tesla View Post
    Wearing a scent is like wearing clothing, one wears in good taste what is respectful as an accessory to the total outfit.
    Precisely

  19. #19

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    In my mind, in my culture, a death is both a time of sadness and grieving but also a moving on. It isn't all about sadness not should it be. We remember all the things we loved and will continue to treasure in the one who has left us.
    I wore the cologne that most reminded me of my father at his funeral and, in time, if my mother goes before I do I will take out my bottle of Mitsouko, spray it onto my chest and white shirt (we Chinese mostly wear white at funerals) and both cry and smile inside my heart at all the things she taught me and instiled in me and all the love she gave me.
    She discovered Mitsouko because I gave it to her.
    She fell in love with it.
    I can see no other way to say goodbye.
    Last edited by zenman7; 19th January 2010 at 05:03 AM.

  20. #20
    Hollandaze's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Narciso Rodriguez for Men has this "gray cloud" feel to it. That's the most depressing fragrance I've worn. The masochist within me leaves me pretty intrigued to wear it again this week (it's been raining lately).

  21. #21
    mr. reasonable's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I travelled to the Gold Coast in Australia late 2008 for my mother's funeral. I bought TdH at Duty Free on the way out on a whim and wore it for the few days I was there - it seemed to mirror the landscape, the light, the red earth and for some reason even the little church tucked away amongst the trees. Every time I wear it I think of her, it is a bright and positive reminder of those few days spent celebrating the life of a wonderful woman with cousins and friends I had not seen for a long time. Perhaps this is unusual - I don't know . . .

  22. #22
    Balavassassin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I'd definitely appreciate one smelling appropriate for a posthumous event. Though, do use a frag that is vastly appreciated through a broad bunch! Some frags can even make people smile! Just choose the right one, even ring up and ask if it is appropriate...never hurts Remember to make sure they appreciate!


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  23. #23

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I would definitely wear perfume, just something that sills very moderately.


    PVC and Leather. A Chain and a feather




  24. #24
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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I guess that a fragrance is basically made to be worn on any occasion, yet this time I voted for no- in my personal opinion, I guess it's sometimes better to go fragrance-free on certain occasions, but this is just a very subjective personal outlook of mine.

  25. #25

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    If the memory of the person recalls a specific scent then I think you should go ahead and remember him/her in your way.
    Last edited by cpk; 19th January 2010 at 10:16 AM.

  26. #26

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by nsamadi View Post
    You guys obviously didn't see the Wedding Crashers.

    "Grief is natures most powerful aphrodisiac".
    Nsamadi you will never stop amazing me !
    Together with the posts you quoted it's the whole thing in a nutshell.
    My (serious) answer would be - no rule! One argument can be as good as the other, depending on circumstances. I basically wear nothing, but I have also found out that Antaeus gave me enough strength to stretch out a supporting hand to others.
    Last edited by narcus; 19th January 2010 at 10:50 AM.
    'Il mondo dei profumi è un universo senza limiti: una fraganza puo rievocare sensazioni, luoghi, persone o ancora condurre in uno spazio di nuove dimensioni emozionali' L. V.

  27. #27

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Have attended two funerals in the last seven days,both ex work colleagues,and decided it wasn't appropriate to wear a scent.
    I think that decision might also have been influenced by my short time as a Basenotes member in realising just how subjective the wearing of scent can be and also how inexperienced my nose is at this stage to trust not offending someone.
    That said,at the most recent funeral in the warmth of the closely packed church congregation,I did notice the faint lingering scent of Creed Erolfa on my jacket which seemed ok.

  28. #28

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I wore Aramis classic to my dad's funeral last year, mainly because it was his favourite frag. It's one of my faves too so i still wear it and, far from associating it with a sad occasion, it will always make me remember all the great times we had when he was alive. But it does depend on the relationship with the person - if it's a family member or friend then I would wear something that I think/knew that they liked to keep those good memories, but if it was a work colleague, acquaintance or distant relative then I would probably choose not to spritz on anything.

  29. #29

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I would wear something light (Gendarme) or perhaps something that reminds me of that person....applied lightly of course.

  30. #30

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Depends apon the person if I wear a scent and if I do its applied lightly.

  31. #31

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    "Boy I'm real sad that Johnny died but man did that one guy smell good" I don't see the point in wearing a fragrance to a funeral, I agree that it would come off as selfish and uncaring.

  32. #32

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    I think it's fine to wear a cologne to a funeral, but I think you have to be careful about which one you wear. It should be tasteful and appropriate for the occasion. I've found Polo Double Black to be a good choice.

  33. #33

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    Quote Originally Posted by Captcrunch View Post
    "Boy I'm real sad that Johnny died but man did that one guy smell good" I don't see the point in wearing a fragrance to a funeral, I agree that it would come off as selfish and uncaring.
    It's so wrong but... i lolled a little...

    I do wonder then... should you use scented soap and shampoo? most soap and shampoo is scented and you will give off a scent... so wearing a single spray of cuba red wouldn't be bad to go to a funeral... It's just how much you look at it.

    If you just go single spray of vetiver, cuba red, eau sauvage or whatever and just not think about it... it is not selfish and uncaring... If you go and spend hours deciding how to smell maybe soo...

    Jus my 2 cents

  34. #34

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    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    A nice Tuberose/Incense/Wood scent would be nice.
    I'm a colognosaurus. Rawr!

  35. #35

    Default Re: Scent for a sad time...

    a spray of Passage D'Enfer, would be more than enough.

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