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  1. #1

    Thumbs down Dilemma: help me out guys!

    My lovely girl friend knows of my interest in decent frags and has bought me a frag as a gift ( God bless her!). When we meet she always wears one of the frags I've bought for her and its much appreciated. However, she has bought Armani Code for me and I hate it. It's terrible!
    So, what should I do? Be a man and grin and wear it to please her or not wear it or what?
    Do I have to confront the issue or can I just quietly retire it to the bin?

  2. #2
    Cartoonish Royalty Le Grand Duc's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Hahaha, you need to be a man,
    and spray yourself with that devilish
    liquid.
    She must love it after all..!

  3. #3

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Quote Originally Posted by dazhel View Post
    My lovely girl friend knows of my interest in decent frags and has bought me a frag as a gift ( God bless her!). When we meet she always wears one of the frags I've bought for her and its much appreciated. However, she has bought Armani Code for me and I hate it. It's terrible!
    So, what should I do? Be a man and grin and wear it to please her or not wear it or what?
    Do I have to confront the issue or can I just quietly retire it to the bin?
    - Wear something similar to Your pleasing, she won't know, keep quiet
    - Wear something totally different - for instance a 'female' frag - to make her know, and talk about

  4. #4

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Tricky. Good luck.

    Not sure how long you've known her so there's a lot of potentlial issues. But if you're a fume head, you have to get her used to the fact you like to switch around.

    I have a woman who only wants me to wear L'eau d'Issey. It took awhile, but now she realizes I like to wear a variety of things. Some she likes, some she loathes.

    There are worse things than her loving Code on you.

    She may not love it by the way...it could be that since you've bought her frags in the past, she was trying to return the favor. If she had no male frag knowledge, a store clerk may have steered into it as one of their "best sellers." I would almost bet on that.

    I have some knowledge of female scents now, but not that long ago, I would have placed myself in the hands of the SA if I were buying perfume for a girlfriend.
    Last edited by StylinLA; 7th March 2010 at 10:38 PM.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Wear it once or twice around her. Tell her how grateful you were for the present. Complain that for some reason it just doesn't work with your chemistry. then swap away most of the bottle and keep in on a shelf where she can see it every time she comes over.
    NEW SPLIT - Tom Ford Lavender Palm 50ml in Atomizer - DISCONTINUED!. .

    Most of the time I am very proud of the Basenotes community. Time after time I have witnessed the thoughtfulness, empathy & genuine friendship that members of this community extend to others - oldtimers & newcomers alike. There are other times, however, when egos get the upper hand and civility goes out the window. My philosophy is that I won't say anything here that I would not say if you were standing in front of me. Welcome to Basenotes, each and every one of us. ~ TwoRoads

  6. #6

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Thanks for the perspective guys, yes there are worse things, yes I need to be a man..... but it does stink!

  7. #7

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    If I have a GF, I'd let her know early in the relationship NEVER to buy me frags unless I've expressed very strong interest in it (though I wouldn't mind a woman buying me Chanel's 28 La Pausa ). Plus I have enough to last me 3 lifetimes already...
    Q: How do you make a feminine fragrance masculine?
    A: Add 'Pour Homme' to the bottle
    - Pierre Bourdon

  8. #8

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Little white lie approach No1.
    Tell her you're allergic to it/your mother is allergic to it/your friend asked to borrow it/ you had friends around and it disappeared/ you were mugged and it was stolen etc

    Little white lie approach No2.
    Tell her that you are saving it for that extremely special day. If a wedding day ever does come about, tell her you've mislaid it.

    Pragmatic approach.
    The stuff may really turn her on. Whenever she's really irrate with you for some reason, clench your teeth and spray it on liberally.

    Renato

  9. #9

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    It could be worse I had a girlfriend who wore this horrid fragrance from the body shop and it made me feel nauseous and I hated been near her when she wore it. I had to man up and tell her in a diplomatic way and she did not take it well , it was like in her mind that I was telling her I did not love her. I got the cold shoulder for a few weeks after telling her and no matter what I said or did I could do no right.lol

  10. #10

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    If your relationship is open, do wear it on occasion--for her. My husband is a non-perfume man, and he wears what I buy him, including letting me spray my Equipage on him. (He uses for himself the Opium PH and Truefitt & Hill 1805 I bought for him.

    It's the same with jewellery. Sometimes I get a gift that is not exactly to my liking, but I wear it to please my husband and express by appreciation of his thoughtfulness.

    He likes it when I wear Victoria's Secret Orange Blossom, which is pleasant, but not one of my favourites.

    Love and life are tradeoffs...if a lover/spouse cannot take it that your taste is not identical to his/hers, then that person needs to grow up. Even the most loving couples are not joined at the hip...
    Last edited by Primrose; 8th March 2010 at 05:57 PM.
    "No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this." Desert Rose by Sting and Cheb Mami, Album 1999.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    I agree with Primrose. Just wear it every once in a while, so she'll know you didn't forget about her.

    If she pushes harder, then you can just throw the bottle away and say someone stole it from your locker at the gym!

  12. #12

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    My wife bought me Curve for Men (a large bottle) about 12 years ago (before she was my wife). She likes it quite a lot. This one doesn't do too much for me. Just to let her know that I appreciate her I wear it maybe twice a year. When I am wearing it, I make sure that it is quite visible in my daily fragrance holding area (bull pen) in our master bathroom. It's only out for one day before retiring to its box in its cool, dark, closet home, but she always notices it and comes in close to get a sniff. It makes her happy that I wear it.

    Even if you hate it, your girlfriend obviously does not. I'm sure she must really like it, so make her feel special by wearing it for her like maybe twice a year.

  13. #13

    Cool Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Quote Originally Posted by Renato View Post
    Little white lie approach No1.
    Tell her you're allergic to it/your mother is allergic to it/your friend asked to borrow it/ you had friends around and it disappeared/ you were mugged and it was stolen etc

    Little white lie approach No2.
    Tell her that you are saving it for that extremely special day. If a wedding day ever does come about, tell her you've mislaid it.

    Pragmatic approach.
    The stuff may really turn her on. Whenever she's really irrate with you for some reason, clench your teeth and spray it on liberally.

    Renato
    I must admit I've always liked the way Renato thinks.

    And I'm stealing StylinLA's " fume head " --It's too good to pass up.

    Well, I was taught to always take a compliment graciously even if it kills you.
    But a frag?
    Hm . . .

    Cheers,

    Mario
    My Wardrobe

    Reviews: http://www.basenotes.net/reviews/30

    Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.

    My Antaeus can beat up your Armani.

  14. #14

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Hunter View Post
    It could be worse I had a girlfriend who wore this horrid fragrance from the body shop and it made me feel nauseous and I hated been near her when she wore it. I had to man up and tell her in a diplomatic way and she did not take it well , it was like in her mind that I was telling her I did not love her. I got the cold shoulder for a few weeks after telling her and no matter what I said or did I could do no right.lol
    Wow, that is horrible. If she got so worked up over something so simple, imagine if you were still together. She should have at least understood that you put up with it for a while but couldn't take it anymore. The fact that she didn't take it well despite you feeling physically nauseous because of her choice is a red flag. It's a good thing she showed this side of her before things went farther.

    As for the topic creator, I would say you should just let her know nicely that you just don't like the fragrance but appreciate her thinking about you when she bought it. See how she takes it. If she understands, then she's a keeper for now. If she doesn't, red flag, mate!

  15. #15
    Frag Bomb Squadron XVII
    Diamondflame's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Tell her the smell of Code always remind you of an ex girlfriend who used to wear Code a lot.
    Trust me, she WILL get you a new fragrance...
    Last edited by Diamondflame; 8th March 2010 at 08:30 AM.

  16. #16

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    I like that one Diamondflame

    I'd also tell her not to buy you any more fragrance since you are very particular but if she insists she should view your wardrobe list. That way she won't buy any more vile stuff.
    But once you get locked into a serious perfume collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.

  17. #17

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Here's what you do. You tell her you were shocked when she gave you the bottle because your previous girlfriend had you wear Code and now all it does is remind you of your ex.

  18. #18

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Wear it a couple of times, and then take her fragrance shopping as a fun, romantic date. You each buy something new, then go home and enjoy it on each other. Fun, and it solves the problem, too. Eventually, you can rotate Code out of your collection, and she won't really notice, especially if you're wearing one of the ones you picked out together.

    Figured this one out a long time ago. Wife and I love shopping fragrance together. It's a fun Saturday afternoon date.

  19. #19

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    If it's not too late for that:
    Wear something you love and she may not have smelled before.
    Pretend it's Code!
    Keep both bottles in a safe place.
    'Il mondo dei profumi č un universo senza limiti: una fraganza puo rievocare sensazioni, luoghi, persone o ancora condurre in uno spazio di nuove dimensioni emozionali' L. V.

  20. #20
    PawelL
    Guest

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Hi Dazhel,

    If I were in your shoes, I'd confront the problem by very politely explaining to your girlfriend that the scent is not really up your alley, so as to avoid more such 'wonderful' presents in the future. I'm not a specialist in women, but from my limited experience ladies treasure an honest approach to any issue, a delicate issue in particular. I'd say something along the lines of 'Please don't spend money on my frags, darling, as I'm a bit of a perfume freak, you know, and I think it's better if I buy my own cologne'.
    Frankly, I don't believe you'd feel comfortable pretending you're in Heaven wearing something you hate. You might feel loyal to your relationship, so to speak - but would you feel honest to your girlfriend? Lying won't get you anywhere, I believe. Just a thought.

    Take care,
    Pawel
    Last edited by PawelL; 8th March 2010 at 05:05 PM.

  21. #21
    PawelL
    Guest

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lian View Post
    I like that one Diamondflame

    I'd also tell her not to buy you any more fragrance since you are very particular but if she insists she should view your wardrobe list. That way she won't buy any more vile stuff.
    I second the reflection.

    ;-)

  22. #22

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Where it once in a while, and especially on occasions that are special to her. (By now you should be able to read her mind, or you are doomed.)

  23. #23

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondflame View Post
    Tell her the smell of Code always remind you of an ex girlfriend who used to wear Code a lot.
    Trust me, she WILL get you a new fragrance...
    Diamondflame, now that's a *creative* white lie...and bound to work. I had some CK Eternity (I love the florals) but when DH told me his old grilfriend wore it, I promptly gave it to a relative.

    Quote Originally Posted by RoteRosen View Post
    Hi Dazhel,

    If I were in your shoes, I'd confront the problem by very politely explaining to your girlfriend that the scent is not really up your alley, so as to avoid more such 'wonderful' presents in the future. I'm not a specialist in women, but from my limited experience ladies treasure an honest approach to any issue, a delicate issue in particular. I'd say something along the lines of 'Please don't spend money on my frags, darling, as I'm a bit of a perfume freak, you know, and I think it's better if I buy my own cologne'.
    Frankly, I don't believe you'd feel comfortable pretending you're in Heaven wearing something you hate. You might feel loyal to your relationship, so to speak - but would you feel honest to your girlfriend? Lying won't get you anywhere, I believe. Just a thought.

    Take care,
    Pawel
    Easy, Pawel, on this. Honesty is not what some women want. For instance, how does one answer, "Honey, does this dress make my butt look too big?" LOL!

    In a mature, solid relationship, one can handle brutal honesty, for sure. Otherwise, tread lightly.
    Last edited by Primrose; 8th March 2010 at 06:13 PM.
    "No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this." Desert Rose by Sting and Cheb Mami, Album 1999.

  24. #24
    PawelL
    Guest

    Default Re: Dilemma: help me out guys!

    'In a mature, solid relationship, one can handle brutal honesty, for sure. Otherwise, tread lightly.[/QUOTE]'

    Obviously. I must have overlooked something - and I wrongly assumed Dazhel's has been a solid relationship.

    Take care,
    P
    Last edited by PawelL; 8th March 2010 at 07:00 PM.

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