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  1. #1

    Default We All Smell Terrible

    A forum game of sorts - if there was a better place to post this, I'm sorry.

    None of us enjoy being accused of bad taste, but what with the subjective nature of the art, we're all bound to run across some criticism of scents we enjoy - so let's hear it! Post a quotation from a memorably underwhelmed, backhanded, vicious, or outright tinfoil-hatted review (from anywhere) of something that you wear happily.

    For me: "thanks to this scent I consumed half a bottle of pain reliever" (Yves Rocher Iris Noir)

    "Thunderstorms don't smell like this; petroleum products do." (Demeter Thunderstorm)

  2. #2
    Cartoonish Royalty Le Grand Duc's Avatar
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    'You smell like rotten pickles!'

    One of my girlfriends standart sayings,
    when I wear my beloved Fahrenheit
    around her ... which I only do when I run
    into her randomly - obviously!

  3. #3

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Wow, I don't think Iris Noir is very strong at all. However, some days I notice I'm more sensitive to certain notes, so perhaps that's why the person said that.

  4. #4

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    My cubicle mate for Givenchy Blue Label:
    "Please don't spray this anymore I beg."

  5. #5
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Spousal disapproval: "You smell like urinal cakes" in reaction to Serge Lutens Miel de Bois.

    Also: On smelling me in Serge Lutens Gris Clair, the same loving spouse: "You smell like Comet cleanser."

    For this I paid $140? Twice?

    My reaction to the second remark: "Sweetie, you need to have your nose examined!"
    Last edited by JaimeB; 10th March 2010 at 07:58 AM.
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    JaimeB

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    Qui nihil potest sperare, desperet nihil.
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  6. #6
    Basteri's Avatar
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Dirt by Demeter.
    I was in the car with my GF and she told me that the car smells horrible like if I left wet towels in the car for a week...she even said that she was having an allergic reaction. I told her it was me that I was wearing DIRT and she told me that I am insane.
    The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.

  7. #7

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Nazareno Gabrielli pour homme only has one review:

    "Absolutely HORRIBLE, smells like some cheap supermarket buscuits + honey... way too sweet and not in a good way... makes you want to puke after a while."

    Yet I enjoy it! I have to admit, though, that the main component of my enjoyment of this scent is nostalgia.

  8. #8

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Quote Originally Posted by Basteri View Post
    Dirt by Demeter.
    I was in the car with my GF and she told me that the car smells horrible like if I left wet towels in the car for a week...she even said that she was having an allergic reaction. I told her it was me that I was wearing DIRT and she told me that I am insane.
    Have you tried the booger, earwax and vomit flavored Jelly Belly candies? http://www.candywarehouse.com/harrypotterbox.html


  9. #9

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    My initial reaction to Guerlain Vetiver: "It smells like the elephant house at the Baltimore Zoo."


  10. #10

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    From a coworker in the elevator line, while I was wearing L'Eau Bleue D'Issey pour Homme: "I hope it is a woman that is wearing that perfume". The discussion continued inside the elevator, when he was asking each woman if she was "the one", and one replied: "It's not me, that's definetely a man's scent". I just wanted to die right there.

    From friends of mine, two weeks ago, wearing the same L'Eau Bleue D'Issey pour Homme: "Wow, are you arriving from the sauna???","what is that???", "let me smell you to find out which one is that", etc.

    If you do not want to be noticed, don't wear LEBDpH...

  11. #11

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    "You smell like an old prostitute" - my wife a few years ago one morning after I'd just sprayed myself with Canoe.

  12. #12
    Pollux's Avatar
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Just a "puaj, you smell like and old woman" from my 14 year old daughter. It was Habit Rouge (sigh).
    Last edited by Pollux; 10th March 2010 at 05:52 PM.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Sorry to be crude, but I got told by a coworker that I "smell like a Cambodian prostitute" the first day I wore Creed BdP to work. Unfortunately, he knows very well what one smells like, so I was quite alarmed. The second time I wore it, I got told I "smelled like a dirty, old Russian millionaire with no taste" . Charming! Apologies to any dirty, old Russian millionaires reading this. Or Cambodian prostitutes.
    We're all in the same game; just different levels. Dealing with the same hell; just different devils.

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  14. #14

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    First time I wore it my wife got a horrible look on her face and said, "You smell like F*ing gasoline!" It was Guerlain Vetiver.

  15. #15

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Quote Originally Posted by morrison74 View Post
    Sorry to be crude, but I got told by a coworker that I "smell like a Cambodian prostitute" the first day I wore Creed BdP to work. Unfortunately, he knows very well what one smells like, so I was quite alarmed.
    Thank you, that made me laugh real hard.

  16. #16

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    "I don't know what's that fragrance, but I'm suffocating. You should please lower the windows".

    My friend, while we were on a drive. I had just sprayed one man show twice on the neck 20 minutes prior to that. :sigh:
    Last edited by HammerFist; 10th March 2010 at 06:19 PM.

  17. #17

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Quote Originally Posted by morrison74 View Post
    Sorry to be crude, but I got told by a coworker that I "smell like a Cambodian prostitute" the first day I wore Creed BdP to work. Unfortunately, he knows very well what one smells like, so I was quite alarmed. The second time I wore it, I got told I "smelled like a dirty, old Russian millionaire with no taste" . Charming! Apologies to any dirty, old Russian millionaires reading this. Or Cambodian prostitutes.
    Hilarious!!! I wanna smell like an old, dirty, Russian millionaire! I've been trying to find something to fit this description for years. lol

    I was told by my girlfriend that I smelt "very sharp and rancid" while wearing Kouros. Interestingly enough, an older women purred, "oooh...you smell goood" when she smelt me wearing the same thing. Go figure....
    Last edited by OlfactoryExperience; 10th March 2010 at 06:26 PM.

  18. #18

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Every Sonoma Scent Studio bar the roses: "Why do you keep putting on stuff that smells like cat butt?"

  19. #19
    Pollux's Avatar
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Oh, I forgot! I was wearing L'Occitane's Vetiver while strolling with a friend. I realized he moved from my right to my left, started to sneeze and said something like "oh, allergies". Suddenly he said, "wait, it is that smell... what the heck is it?". I couldn't play fool I showed him my wrist, he took a whiff and said something hard to translate in English without sounding like a brute. Literally, he descibed it as bug spray.

  20. #20

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Every once and a while Shalimar, Mitsouko, or L'Heure Bleue will elicit "grandma" comments, but I don't listen. Someone told me I smelled like a French whore once, but I had overapplied YSL Opium (feminine) that day so that was kind of what I was going for.
    I offer you perfume,
    More for its pleasure than for yours;
    You perfume perfume.

    --Anonymous Ancient Greek Love Lyric

  21. #21

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    I've heard that I "smell like bug spray" twice, from two different people, on two different continents. The culprit fragrances were Azzaro Visit (really??) and Eau de Cartier Concentree (I sort of agree).

    My girlfriend says Dior Eau Sauvage "smells like my creepy great uncle." Also, when I wore Aramis:
    *with a sidelong look, leaning slightly away from me with a repulsed look on her face* a polite but direct, "I don't think I like your cologne today." I thought it was pretty funny.
    Last edited by LiveJazz; 10th March 2010 at 08:12 PM.
    "It's not what you look like when you're doing what you're doing; it's what you're doing when you're doing what you look like you're doing."

  22. #22

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Some daffy woman passed by me in an aisle of a shop: "Whoa, something smells like mothballs over here!" she said. I was wearing L'Artisan's Tea for Two. But maybe there were some mothballs somewhere around too, I don't know. She gave me stink eye I think.
    That girl, that bottle, that mattress and me.

  23. #23

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    My girlfriend literally gagged when I had on Polo Modern Reserve. But then again she has odd tastes and LOVES Demeter Chocolate Chip cookie when I wore it to actually attempt to get a laugh but instead she loved it.
    Imagine there were no hypothetical situations.

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  24. #24

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    Happens to me also my friend,there's frags i love & my wife hates them... She hates Givenchy-Gentleman, and most Really woodsy Aramis type scents. But today she said she loved Bois Du Portugal :0) Good cuz i love it!!!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by JaimeB View Post
    Spousal disapproval: "You smell like urinal cakes" in reaction to Serge Lutens Miel de Bois.

    Also: On smelling me in Serge Lutens Gris Clair, the same loving spouse: "You smell like Comet cleanser."

    For this I paid $140? Twice?

    My reaction to the second remark: "Sweetie, you need to have your nose examined!"

  25. #25

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    I was wearing By Kilian "Straight to heaven" the other day at work, a coworker told me: "Hey, you smell like a tree!"

  26. #26

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    I realized that women love gourmands (ahem JPG and Doir Homme)
    and anything that smells like Aqua Di Geo (Light Blue, etc)

    The worst comment I got was when I went to Macys and an SA asked me what I liked to wear, I told her Safari, she said "Ewww thats old man cologne" and pointed me to some AdG, I smiled and told her I'm not into that stuff lol
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  27. #27
    Hillaire
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    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    My mother told me when I was wearing Theo Fennel Scent

    "You smell like a Chinese restaurant bathroom, like that certain incense and Chinese food and bathroom cleaner."

    It was kind of a brilliant review, actually, if you know the stuff.

  28. #28

    Default Re: We All Smell Terrible

    I lady-friend of mine once told me about most of my frags in my wardrobe: oh, they are too strong, too Oriental, an attractive man should never wear such overpowering stuff

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