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  1. #121
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by Tropics View Post
    Dior homme intense. That sickly, synthetic, cloying, ugly, cheap mess made me want to vomit. It's an extremely offensive stink for those poor souls around you. That chemical trash should never be sprayed on human skin.
    You used to much.

  2. #122
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Serge Noire
    Womanity
    Millesime Imperial

  3. #123
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by tristan1973 View Post
    Serge Noire
    Womanity
    Millesime Imperial
    Really??
    Hard work never killed anyone, but why risk it?

  4. #124
    Basenotes Junkie Profumo Saggio's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    A*Men
    Polo Green

    I own an older bottle of Polo simply for collection purposes, but I can see no viable reason to spend money on the Mugler atrocity.
    Current Favorites:
    1. Le 3me Homme - Caron
    2. Yatagan - Caron
    3. Van Cleef & Arples Pour Homme
    4. Dolce & Gabbana pour Homme
    5. Kouros - YSL
    6. L'Anarchiste - Caron
    7. Xeryus - Givenchy
    8. V.I.P. Special Reserve - Giorgio Beverly Hills
    9. The Dreamer - Versace
    10. Nobile - Gucci

  5. #125
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Fluid Iceberg ?? did you really throw the bottle ? where ?

    - - - Updated - - -

    Beyond Paradise. puts me really off.

  6. #126
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by indianwells View Post
    Really??
    does it sound funny?

  7. #127
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    JOOP HOMME!
    I hated this stuff for many years, but after a long time thought maybe my nose has changed enough to give it another try. (found a REALLY cheap Tester for sale, so I got tempted on it!) you know what happened?
    I got really suffocated again just spraying one puff!
    I don't take it even if it was for FREE!

  8. #128

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Dior Fahrenheit.


    I get NOTHING but gasoline. Imagine smelling a lighter while at a gas station, and you get Fahrenheit.

  9. #129
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    I love these threads. It always reminds me as to how subjective everything can be.

  10. #130
    Super Member Mr G's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    C&S Cuba

  11. #131
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Guerlain Vetiver. To me it smells like soap from a hospital rest-room dispenser spilled in an ash tray.

  12. #132

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by Profumo Saggio View Post
    A*Men
    Polo Green

    I own an older bottle of Polo simply for collection purposes, but I can see no viable reason to spend money on the Mugler atrocity.
    Exactly my 2 as well! For all I know, A*Men ends up smelling fantastic in dry-down, but it's one of the few I can't even bring myself to suffer through the early stages of to find out. Polo Green just smells like an awful conflicting mess out of the bottle to me. I can't wear it...at all, but I have found it to be at least tolerable when some others have worn it.

  13. #133

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Amouage Interlude Man. Tried it again the other day. Just a complete mess of mismatched notes. Like a kid walking up to a piano and smashing the keys with both hands and trying to say that the notes were all blended together perfectly...

    scrubber.
    Seasonal favorites:

    1. Creed - Spice & Wood
    2. Creed - Aventus
    3. Brückner - Aoud 1
    4. Armani Privé - Oud Royal
    5. by Kilian - Incense Oud
    6. Dior - Vetiver
    7. Les Nez - Turtle Vetiver Back
    8. Neela Vermeire - Trayee
    9. Amouage - Jubilation XXV
    10. Creed - Royal English Leather

  14. #134

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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Dior leather oud

  15. #135
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    I don't know If exactly the worst but Penhaligon's Bluebell is very close...


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  16. #136
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    The completely unwearable Secretions Manifiques has got to top my list.

    Dishonorable mentions to the loathsome L'eau d'Issey pour Homme, the utterly weird stink bomb Black Afgano and A Taste of Hell... I mean Heaven.
    Current Top Favorites:
    1) Portrait of a Lady (EdP Frédéric Malle)
    2) Giorgio for Men vintage (Giorgio Beverly Hills)
    3) Dia Man vintage edt (Amouage)
    4) Les Nombres d'Or Vetyver (Mona di Orio) - tie
    4) Lalfeorosa (O'driů) - tie

    6) Anat Fritz Original Formula and Classical (Anat Fritz)
    7) Captain vintage (Molyneux)
    8) Tzora (Anat Fritz)

  17. #137
    Basenotes Member Jean paul Jicky's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by A. Homme View Post
    Czech and Speake No. 88.
    what?!

    - - - Updated - - -

    I hate almost every fragrance by "Il Profvmo", esp. Santal Rouge and Bamboo which smell like a cheap department shower gel; also Cardinal by Heeley, Amethiste by Lalique, and...last but not least....More et Musc in all its skanky-cheap variations!

    P.S. I didn't mention every Hugo/D&G/Gucci/Le Male/One Million because I'd rather wear gasoline while holding a matchbox than one of those disgusting juices...

    - - - Updated - - -

    anyway...strangely enough, no gag-reflex problems with ELD'O Secretions Magnifiques with me.

  18. #138
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Zirh Ikon

  19. #139

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by yuyu15 View Post
    Dior leather oud
    This one is certainly in my top 3 also.
    Seasonal favorites:

    1. Creed - Spice & Wood
    2. Creed - Aventus
    3. Brückner - Aoud 1
    4. Armani Privé - Oud Royal
    5. by Kilian - Incense Oud
    6. Dior - Vetiver
    7. Les Nez - Turtle Vetiver Back
    8. Neela Vermeire - Trayee
    9. Amouage - Jubilation XXV
    10. Creed - Royal English Leather

  20. #140

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Polo Blue. Bleach smells better than this.

  21. #141
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Black XS, it's like pure candy. I can already taste the slime forming in my mouth by just sniffing it.

  22. #142
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    One of the few "scrubbers" I have encountered is Cartier Declaration. After spraying it on I get about 3 seconds of a decent scent then it transforms into a horrible body odor stench. To be sure it just wasn't my nose I had my wife test it and she was in complete agreement.
    Tom Ford Splits Oud Wood / Tobacco Vanille / Tobacco Oud / Neroli Portofino / Noir de Noir / Tuscan Leather / Plum Japonais/ Oud Fleur / Italian Cypress HERE

  23. #143
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    bijan men followed closely by zegna extreme. They should only be worn when engaging the enemy at war.

  24. #144

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    It used to be Musc Kublai Khan. I think Luca Turin's book says it smells like a camel rider's armpit after a week in the desert. Yeah, that's about right.

    But we now have a new winner: Jicky/Mouchour de Monsieur (or however it is spelled). Disgusting. Horrifying.
    Current Top Ten:

    1. Creed Millesime Imperial
    2. Serge Lutens Chergui
    3. Hermes Concentre d'Orange Verte
    4. Creed Virgin Island Water
    5. Chanel Eau de Cologne
    6. Thierry Mugler Pure Havane
    7. Van Cleef & Arpels Pour Homme
    8. Bulgari Blu
    9. Bond No. 9 New Haarlem
    10. YSL Kouros

  25. #145
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Canoe. I recognize it probably smells fine on other folks, but it's positively rancid mold on my skin. I'd rather smell like cat urine, frankly.

  26. #146

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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Two reformulations come to mind: Givenchy Gentleman in the most recent incarnation and, believe it or not, the even worse current incarnation of Paco Rabanne pour Homme. Both are just embarrasingly bad. Shame on them for selling this s**t to people who remember how great they once were!

  27. #147
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Gucci Guilty PH.

  28. #148
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Easy, Bond No. 9 Wall Street. DISGUSTING stuff...

  29. #149

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Cartier roadster. Can't stand it
    Is the juice worth the squeeze?

  30. #150

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Le Labo Oud 27
    CURRENT TOP 5

    1. Dior Homme Intense
    2. Creed Aventus
    3. Tom Ford Extreme
    4. Gucci Pour Homme II
    5. Terre d'Hermes

  31. #151
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    I just got a free sample of this with an order today:
    Pierre Cardin Bleu Marine

    The reviews that mention pickle juice are correct. There is a vile spiced pickle vomit smell that blends with the other notes to create a truly putrid odor.

  32. #152

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Joop Homme and 1 Million. I just had to try them didn't I?

  33. #153

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    The reformulation of Amouage - Homage Attar. By comparison its a trainwreck.

    Armani Code Sport, Just nasty and cheap. I don't know how it sold any bottles with that top note.

    Bond no.9 - Chinatown. Sickly sweet evaporated milk vomit. If the stink wasn't bad enough its also so strong and dense that it envelops you. The first scent I've encountered that I'd classify as 'frightening'.

  34. #154
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Niche? All of Eau D'Italie, with the exception of Bois de Ombrie - found it bold, though. JHAG is not my prefered one either.

    A local cheapy I smelt and threw it to the waste bin without hesitation. Nauseating...

  35. #155
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Showerless by People on the Bus

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Scentologist View Post
    Cartier roadster. Can't stand it
    strangely enough I get lots of positive feedback it reminds me of Givenchy Gentleman less animalistic!

  36. #156
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    I must add these 2 dandies, ferragamo platinum pour homme and the united colors of benetton!!!! Toxicoramanific MAN.

  37. #157
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Agua Brava
    For those about to stink, I salute you!

  38. #158
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Not sure which one exactly but one of the Costume National decants I received smelt like pi55. Apologies for being crude but it really was bad!

  39. #159
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    angel men

  40. #160
    Super Member Nemanja's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by Francolino View Post
    Showerless by People on the Bus
    Lmfao

  41. #161
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by Francolino View Post
    Showerless by People on the Bus
    Good call, Francolino There's also a knock-off called Showerless by People At MY Work Place that's even worst because the original Showerless had a weak lasting power (rangin from 30 minutes from an hour depending on application). The knock off has 8+ hours lasting...pretty tenacious...


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  42. #162
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by Freddie23 View Post
    Dior Fahrenheit.


    I get NOTHING but gasoline. Imagine smelling a lighter while at a gas station, and you get Fahrenheit.
    This & Aramis Devin.

  43. #163
    Dependent forfreddie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Byredo Seven Veils is well up there.

  44. #164
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Tom Ford Lavender Palm. So heavy it crushes the sinuses.

  45. #165
    Basenotes Junkie psychoskip's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Fahrenheit. BLEH! Gasoline. Pure Gasoline.

  46. #166
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Azzaro Pure Vetiver - Smells like a compost heap full of rotten grass with Windex poured over it.

  47. #167

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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Perfumum fumidus - wet ashtray
    “Perfume is like cocktails without the hangover, like chocolate without the calories, like an affair without tears, like a vacation from which you never have to come back.”

  48. #168
    Super Member Miket's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    I'm happy to admit that I enjoy the vast majority of mainstream designer, and even drug-store scents. In my experience, while there are a few which are legitimately bad, that I would be hard put to wear outside even on a bet, even these tend to have some reasonable aspect, especially nowadays. Older fragrances in my experience reach greater depths of stink, but by the same token they also reach greater heights of excellence. Niche fragrances are, I feel, in the same realm although I rarely buy them not only for that reason but because in this country sampling is a pain, and because I can buy vintage at that price, or something from a high-end designer line, and it is a rare niche fragrance which captures me so well as to seem a better choice. Plus I often find the bottles dull. Shallow perhaps, but the bottle is very important to me.

    That said. I've always found the opening of Kouros to be almost frighteningly akin to the stench that lurks in certain public toilets. I get an overpoweringly bitter piss-and-sweat note offset by a subtle and gelid streak of chemical stink both vaguely citric (as of urinal cakes) and offensively astringent, like stale bleach. Thankfully this doesn't last, and I do think there is a lot of good in there too. Still, even the bottle is redolent of toilet-porcelain and though I respect it in spite of this for how good it can smell on others once it develops I will always turn to other scents first. Regardless of how fleetingly I will not allow a scent on my skin that makes me smell like an unclean public bathroom.

    Joop! Homme, when over sprayed or worn in hot weather is sickeningly heady, and the syrupy opening especially is fantastically noxious under such conditions. It's true that when it's applied gently and used in the cool I really enjoy it, but there are very few scents which have the capacity to be such an epic olfactory disaster as this syrupy little powerhouse.

    Another disappointing, and awful smelling fragrance - with a particularly evocative sort of vileness - that springs to mind is Musc Nomade by Annick Goutal. This might seem strange because I like a lot of Musky scents and when I hear someone talking about 'skank' in a fragrance I consider it a good thing, and this is reviewed by many as a very tame Musk. It seemed like just the thing for me, and Annick Goutal and I have generally had a very stable relationship. I even went to a fancy department store in the CBD to try it out. What a crushing disappointment it was though! I once knew a fellow who did all-together too many drugs. I don't know what it was, but at one point he must have been releasing something foul from his system because he reeked like nothing else I've ever come across. I actually had to wash my couch cushions after he had sat on them, it was that bad. Musc Nomade brought me to this memory instantly; it was as if this man had sweated into a bottle on that very day. Utterly unpleasant with no redeeming features, the scent just stayed that way through its entire lifespan. I've yet to find the courage for another sample.

    Brut, in both it's classic and modern interpretations, is not so much bad to me as it is obnoxious. Whenever I smell it I get a very strong urge to hit whoever is wearing it.

    Good Life (Davidoff); subjective, I know, but I've seen it selling nowdays for fairly good money, and it astounds me anyone could think it worth hunting down. Top: Fig, Middle: Fig, Base: Fig. Does it smell bad? Not especially, in fact if you like fig it probably smells good and I'm partial to fig, but it feels so linear and simple-minded I think it qualifies as one of the worst. I've smelled drugstore eaux with more character and evolution.

    Garden Sensual (Guerlain); not bad, but at this price-point, from this house, it failed to deliver what I feel is a reasonable expectation viz a viz quality by a very problematic margin, and probably rates as my worst overall buy of the last few years. Thankfully I was able to give it away to someone who loves it.

    Coriolan (Guerlain); not bad, but definitely the most disappointing scent I've ever worn. I can tell you when I heard about this scent, by Jean Paul Guerlain himself, a masculine chypre with so many incredibly, exotic ingredients, and oak moss and patchouli in the base, inspired by a Roman general I was certain I had found something which was sure to become my signature. And it was unutterably divine. I was actually prepared to set it beside my beloved Worth Pour Homme as a Chypre alternative for those moments when something more elegant and polite than vintage Givenchy Gentleman was called for. Even the bottle was amazing; it is in fact one of my all-time favourites. Then something terrible happened late in the drydown. Coriolan departed my skin, and left behind a fecal note redolent of unaccompanied civet oil that was insistent, persistent and truly sickening. The first time it happened I spent three nauseous hours wondering why I felt so sick. My mind literally refused to process or accept that it could possible be my beloved new Coriolan. In the end however it hit me like a ton of bricks, and I had to scrub it. I wasn't so easily deterred as this, but despite doing my level best to love this for all its incredible potential it is simply not tolerable on my skin, and I stubbornly used up almost a third my 100ml bottle before finally accepting it. L'Ame du Heroes lacks this quality, but the bottle is a disappointment (nothing against the bee bottle, but I have plenty of those and Coriolan's was something unique) plus I find it a little on the fey side (where I believe Coriolan was just about unisex) and almost impossible to find. Truly crushing.

    Not what you would call a 'cologne,' but I have to say something about Gucci Rush 2 which a friend of mine bought for close to $200. The bottle is disgustingly cheap and truly a slap in the face at the price, and the juice inside deserves no better setting.

  49. #169
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    1 million.

  50. #170
    Basenotes Junkie psychoskip's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by rynegne View Post
    Easy, Bond No. 9 Wall Street. DISGUSTING stuff...
    Same. I tested it once, then cursed Bond No. for tainting the air in which I breathe.

    Most Bond's i didn't care for. The only one I could stand was New Haarlem and little italy. Yet, new haarlem was too sweet, and Little italy was just a straight blast of zest.

  51. #171
    Basenotes Junkie Skyline's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Dior Homme. Smells like a rich grandma.

  52. #172
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by BrutalismX View Post
    I love these threads. It always reminds me as to how subjective everything can be.
    +1 spot on!

  53. #173

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Polo Green

  54. #174
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    I'm surprised no Montale Fragrance was mentioned by name. I LOVE some of their frags, Dark Aoud, Black Aoud, Red Aoud, BUT... Bois de Aoud smells EXACTLY like those little white urinal cakes they drop in a urinal to keep down the smell. I washed it off. I also had to wash off Bn9 Riverside Drive, Bn9 Wall St, Bn9 NY Oud, Bn9 Bleeker St, Bn9...
    For Sale: Gengis Kahn, Mona d' Orio, Penhaligons.

  55. #175
    Super Member Daze's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Don't know if it's really the worst I've smelled but Orange Star by Andy Tauer gives me a bad reaction (sorry Andy). Apparently my nose can't handle strong orange/orange flower/orange blossom centered fragrances and Orange Star is the worst in that regard. It gives me a headache and literally hurts my nose and throat. Other ones that give me that reaction are Amouage Reflection Man and, I hate to say it, APOM pour Homme by Maison Francis Kurkdjian...

  56. #176

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    A*men
    Fahrenheit
    Narciso Rodriguez for Him
    my gosh..... oh my skin these stink
    “Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”

  57. #177

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Terre D'Hermes.

    This is proof that we need to be careful when judging scents as being bad. Obviously, Terre D'Hermes isn't garbage by any means, but my nose can't handle the Iso E Super at all. It smells downright atrocious to me. I find it as offensive as the worst B.O. (not that it smells like B.O. I'm just saying I find it equally offensive to my nose).

  58. #178

    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Maybe it doesn't work on my skin....
    Egoiste (Chanel)

  59. #179
    Dry_Martini's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    in order:

    1- EAU SAUVAGE EXTREME

    2- SERGE LUTENS MKK

    vomitive
    #TOP 5#: Antico Caruso, Penhaligons Racquets,Creed BayRhum Vetiver,Domenico Caraceni,Castle Forbes 1445

  60. #180
    Basenotes Junkie psychoskip's Avatar
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    Default Re: Worst cologne you've ever smelled???????????

    Quote Originally Posted by L'Homme Blanc Individuel View Post
    Terre D'Hermes.

    This is proof that we need to be careful when judging scents as being bad. Obviously, Terre D'Hermes isn't garbage by any means, but my nose can't handle the Iso E Super at all. It smells downright atrocious to me. I find it as offensive as the worst B.O. (not that it smells like B.O. I'm just saying I find it equally offensive to my nose).
    I agree with you on this. Hermes is a respectable house, and I know it isn't garbage. I just don't like it

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