I was on vacation last week. I spent the time mostly just being...amazed...that I wasn't working, staring out the window in a trancelike stupor. Savoring the moment like a freshly feasted spider quivering with overwhelming waves of luxury in the wake of it's feast but by Friday, I had become restless and hungry again. Hungry for dishwasher tablets and sundry items so I raised up and bolted into town to do some hardcore hunting and gathering. I managed to scare up a pair of good fitting jeans and a couple of good fitting, handsome, subtlly manly shirts. I needed a belt too but the place I made a special trip to for a belt had absolutely none, in fact they were out of several other items I'd hoped to get there however I did come away with some incredible jams (the store is what I would call an upscale health food emporium and they sometimes have Hempy's Belts- cool belts). I got locally made Huckleberry Jam, Serviceberry Jam (I have never heard of serviceberry before- they are similar to huckleberries in size and shape and taste but firmer and sweeter) and "Jalapeno Road Rage Jam" which is made from no less than four different berries plus loads of pepper and spice. When I got back into the car with the jam, I had a sudden urge to open the bottle of Shalimar Eau De Cologne I had scored at TJ Maxx, my first stop of the trip (for $49.95). The Shalimar was actually on TJ Maxx's "Men's Fragrance" shelf and of course I took that as a strong sign from the universe that I should buy it. I knew it was the classic woman's fragrance and I was very tempted to grab it and run to the checkout but I hesitated- a little. Partly because my Mother (an ex-fragrance counter worker) told me during a little chat we'd had last winter about how I'd been experimenting with women's fragrance and specifically that I was in the midst of exploring House Guerlain and fallen in love with Jicky. She told me that she was given a bottle of Shalimar Parfum back in the 1960's and that she really likes it but very seldom wears it. I hesitated buying the Shalimar also partly because I have tried many perfumes in the last year and have not liked many of them for me- I suspected Shalimar was obviously going to be something I couldn't wear- my suspicion was wrong. I like the idea of Parfum mostly because it is more potent and seems to require more skill and more heart to employ and parfum usually lasts longer and it delivers more notes to my tired, old nose. I hesitated also because I couldn't really afford it. I had several stops to make on this trip and as it happened, the Shalimar was exactly the first item to pop up for consideration- I knew I needed to pace myself but pacing myself, when it comes to money, is not one of my longs suits and besides, I have recently resolved to become a "collector" of perfume and even create a special place in which to make fragrance stores and visit them and occasionally employ them as a sort of drug in my day to day life like any other special concoction from nature and industry which we are likely to partake of in search of normal to slightly advanced consciousness raising, attitude adjustment or a variety of simple sensory pleasures. I believe it is our duty as human beings upon the earth to experience sensual joy, sensual expansion, sensual experimentation in pursuit of sensual bliss but we need to be careful because humans are also sometimes silly and overindulgent which can and usually does spoil the overall experience of our sensual pleasure. Everything in moderation. Moderation is what keeps the ultimate experience of our indulgences "special". Overindulgence actually dulls the senses- there needs to be some abstinence doesn't there? A period of abstinence clears the senses- makes them open up, ready and eager for fresh stimulation...that is why strategic silence in a piece of music makes the ears leap out.
I am ready for Shalimar.
Sitting in the car, I pulled the Shalimar box out of the bag and looked at it. I decided I couldn't wait to get home to spray some on. I could no longer abstain despite the fact that I could still smell the spots of Cuir De Ruisse which I applied that morning coming off of me. Silly me, I was heading straight for Overindulgenceville and I knew it but I went to work on the plastic sheathing surrounding the box anyway. After several minutes of gouging away fruitlessly with my puny fingernails, futilely trying to make even a tiny opening that I could then tear into and make a bigger hole and even after toasting the wrapper with a lighter to make it more stretchy all absolutely to no avail, I began to think the wrapper was not made with mere plastic as we know it but rather some sort of condensed resin designed to resemble clear rhinoceros hide and it became exceedingly clear that what I needed was a knife and I just happened to have one with me...
Using my Bowie Knife to open the package really was an act of necessity rather than that of making a statement but as I was doing it, it occurred to me that intrinsically, and because I possess an acute sense of irony, that the idea of such an act is undeniably ironic. Honestly, I don't think one requires an acute sense of irony to see that a man wielding a bowie knife to open a box of Shalimar not as a favor to a lady who is in need of a perfume box slashing but only to make good on a personal indulgence and get at this mysterious juice to spray upon his own pulse points is...it's is ironic maybe and a little weird too...by the way...I keep the knife in my car between the console and the driver's seat not as a concealed weapon but because I take it along on my daily dog walks in The Beartooth Mountains here in Montana. I also carry a large canister of "Grizzly Tough" pepper spray with me- both knife and pepper spray are on my belt whenever I venture into the local woods and all but forgotten the rest of the time. Carrying the knife in the forest just makes me feel like I won't ever be caught empty handed should fate bring me the dreaded chance violent encounter with one of our big bears (knock wood). It's more a romantic notion than anything practical or logical, I highly doubt I would even get it out of the scabbard, let alone defend myself with it. (I also possess a strong sense of romance- probably...but I digress)
I have been observing this forum for about a year now and it seems there is an ongoing discussion regarding gender crossover fragrances and I am want to simply say: Damn straight, the stuff smells wonderful, what the hell, you only live once, GO FOR IT DUDE, spray the Shalimar on your jugular vein and float away but it's not that simple (you'll see that I have a penchant for complicating simple things with romance and irony). During the course of my perfume experimentation / mania this last year, I have become increasingly bold. I even wore perfume on construction sites at my job as a commercial painter. OMG, I wore Frederic Malle's "Portrait Of A Lady" to a construction meeting one tuesday morning. A room in a job shack filled with regular guy types, burly plumbers and welders and members of the electrical workers brotherhood with Buck Knives upon their belts and hard hats upon their heads, a maple bar in one hand and a half-gallon sized travel mug in the other. I sat in that meeting with Portrait Of A Lady transmitting from behind my left ear and from upon my right wrist- chillin' like an old panther asleep in a bush, high on his own stench. So what is left for this discussion but which Lady's perfumes are we men liking to wear on ourselves, for ourselves or which Men's Cologne are the Ladies appropriating for their own indulgence? Well maybe this:
The Sanctity Of Scent
What or whom is perfume for? I recall hearing one time that in days of old, it was inappropriate for lower class people to use the aromatics of the upper class. Could be that perfumery has always been expensive and not available to people of intensely modest means and might it also be just as inappropriate for a man to indulge his senses with women's fragrance by his own hand and design at his jaded leisure? My earliest experience with perfumes and colognes and even after shaves was one of pure indulgence- I liked to put on my Dad's after shave and I liked to take the tops off my Mom's perfume and smell them but I seemed instinctively aware not to put my Mom's perfume on (maybe my Mom warned me not to do that?) I also recall my being hip to the romantic connotations of fragrance. In third grade, I rode my bicycle down to Woolworths one saturday morning to buy a bottle of perfume for a girl I had a crush on that year so long ago. I witnessed the exchanging of perfume and cologne between my parents and other adults on Christmases, birthdays and Valentines Days but I have to ask myself now as I consider my unbridled indulgence of lady's perfume, in my post latter years- who is it for and why do I do it? If perfume is made for women to wear for the enjoyment of men and being a heterosexual man- maybe that's not right for me? Not that I am uncomfortable with me stimulating men- just saying. It's like men wearing Elk urine to stimulate and attract Elks but without the machination hunting or in my case sexuality. If perfume is made for women to wear for the enjoyment of men (and it probably is) and being a man presently without the consort of a woman (in a romantic sense) then by wearing perfume upon my person aren't I, in a fashion, summoning the romantic ghost of femininity? Yes, of course I am and so each time I spray or dab perfume behind my ears, surely, fit is a desperate act of loneliness and grieving and a romantic delusion of she who is not, circumventing her absence and surreptitiously hinting her presence oh well, I'm glad that's settled. So it is with that solemn understanding that I partake. In my defense, I do not wear the fragrance of former lovers...that often. I did put on my Ex's Amarige and dance around the house a little, one afternoon, not long after we broke up and for some time after that, I put an occasional drop of Amarige upon her vacant pillow- a bit Tomb Of Ligeia I know, but it is interesting to note the power and meaning of fragrance, isn't it?
So I leave it to you to sort out the reason you might indulge in transexual fragrance. Do you just like the way it smells or is there something else? It is Monday now. I am having bread and jam and coffee- back to work shortly- Shalimar upon my gloves.
(I apologize, I wasn't able to make my attachments large and luscious- bummer)
Last edited by pue chien mouillé; 13th August 2012 at 02:30 PM. Reason: typos and sharpening