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  1. #1

    Default Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Hey there,

    I never usually wear anything with more than one spray, and even that I am a bit scared of. I am always afraid that I will offend someone. I don't want to be that person who thinks they smell good but really doesn't. How can I get over this fear of offending people?

  2. #2
    Basenotes Junkie
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Hmm.. Not wearing anything at all would be one way I guess...

    But really, first and foremost, YOU personally should be able to derive something positive out of wearing stuff. What someone else thinks is secondary.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I'm always concerned about this too..that's why I only did one spray to the chest and possibly one on the forearm. Now, I started doing a couple on the chest and one on the back of the neck..possibly one on the shirt. My goal is to make sure I can smell it for the duration of the scent. I haven't had anybody complain, but maybe they were just being nice. I need to find a good method to make sure I can enjoy my fragrances every time.

  4. #4
    vita odorifera
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    First off, perfume is about being smelled by others. Otherwise, why would Basenoters start threads about mysterious frags they smelled on others but cant identify? Or why is there a sticky thread on compliments received? Or frags which get the best compliments? Personally, one spray is what i would apply to the back of my hand just to sample a frag. Despite several locked threads on topics like this, i believe that, with time and experience, most people are sensible and know when the line of moderation is crossed to the region of overspraying.

    To the OP i would suggest being confident about what he personally enjoys, while being moderate with numbers of sprays. Perhaps get close friends to give opinions on strength/projection till a level of comfort is attained.
    ointments and perfume delight the heart....

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  5. #5
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I'm going to help give you courage by admitting that we need people who wear more than one spray of fragrance.

    The following was my spontaneous reaction to what you said. I honestly got angry at what has happened to this world. That you are scared to wear more than one spray, because of what WE did to society.

    ***

    Honestly, I don't want to keep living in a world where everybody doesn't offend everybody else. I want all my old enemies back. I want the disgusting, the obnoxious, the overly beautiful, and the annoyingly fascinating characters to come crawling back into my existence like invading zombies. The weird brainiac old money dude with hair like a Brillo pad who never washed his clothes, spat in cups and would give you the shirt off his back if you were ever in need - the most honest person I ever met, except for the girl who couldn't lie, and an inspiration for my entire life. The macho guy down the hall who hit on every woman, stole my girlfriend, refused to wear deodorant and stank like the dead, and then decided to start wearing fragrance and smelled like somebody had dropped a bottle of perfume on the shower floor and shattered it.

    Come back, Abu! All is forgiven!

    The French chick with skin like porcelain who refused to use soap - the only white chick I ever dated who was truly white. The most lying, using, deceptive woman I ever met. Please, if there is a God, may she still exist and have screwed over a thousand men and maybe some women, too, just to make this world a more interesting place.

    There. If those people have my permission to make this world better by offending me, then please use 5 sprays and make this increasingly gray world worthy of some alien Captain Kirk writing home about it.

    STINK ME BABY! STINK ME AND LET'S ROCK THIS PLACE!


    ***

    OK. Maybe that's a bit strong. But I definitely think you can go to 2 or 3 sprays, no problemo.
    * * * *

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Willanhanyard View Post
    How can I get over this fear of offending people?
    Perhaps by starting to be more confident in yourself in that understanding that you wear fragrance not only for your own personal enjoyment but also because you wish to share your enjoyment with others by having them experience the same pleasurable feeling that you do. If you're OK with one spray - fine. If you would like to apply more do it gradually and observe the reaction. Probably the reaction from others isn't going to change at all. However, you won't know until you take that step when you feel ready.

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    Mean spirited, nasty, snide, sarcastic, hateful, and rude individuals don't warrant or deserve other individuals' acknowledgement or respect.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by perfaddict View Post
    First off, perfume is about being smelled by others. Otherwise, why would Basenoters start threads about mysterious frags they smelled on others but cant identify? Or why is there a sticky thread on compliments received? Or frags which get the best compliments? Personally, one spray is what i would apply to the back of my hand just to sample a frag. Despite several locked threads on topics like this, i believe that, with time and experience, most people are sensible and know when the line of moderation is crossed to the region of overspraying.

    To the OP i would suggest being confident about what he personally enjoys, while being moderate with numbers of sprays. Perhaps get close friends to give opinions on strength/projection till a level of comfort is attained.
    Very interesting comment that touched on things I've been pondering. I think I'm noticing that guys are much more likely to focus on how others react to a scent, especially women. However, I think for women perfume is often about their own personal enjoyment. I work at home and on many days don't even see anyone (which I love, given my need for extended periods of focus). I wear scent every single day, just for me, and am disappointed if I can't smell it. If my guy hates it, I won't wear it around him, but I'll still wear it.

    To the OP: Speaking for myself, I want to smell the scent a guy is wearing. When an S.A. sprayed AdP Colonia Intensa Oud at a perfume counter, I darned near almost passed out in bliss. It's the strongest and also the best male scent I've ever smelled. It needs a master of the universe personality to carry if off, I guess. He wears his Creed Aventus and I think, yeah, that's nice. Oud 27, yeah, good. He wears his AdP and I think entirely other thoughts. If you want to catch female attention, I say err on the side of more sprays if you're wearing a great fume.
    Last edited by ScentFan; 23rd December 2013 at 07:34 AM.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Redneck Perfumisto View Post
    Honestly, I don't want to keep living in a world where everybody doesn't offend everybody else...
    STINK ME BABY! STINK ME AND LET'S ROCK THIS PLACE!
    The Perfumisto Manifesto!

  9. #9

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    More wary about that at work, but more willing to reach into my environment off duty.

  10. #10

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I personally think the whole 'cologne guy' thing is grossly exaggerated. I rarely smell cologne on other guys in the first place, and can only recall one time in the past year that I thought 'whoaaaaaa that's WAY too much cologne'. It was just a high school kid who likely didn't know any better. Smelled him from approx 25 feet away in an uncovered outdoor parking lot lol. Women, on the other hand, frequently overspray but I usually don't mind because it's rarely unpleasant.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I would look into fragrances that are light and inoffensive. Great thing about this hobby is that there are fragrances for everyone no matter what your taste or style is.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I kind of stopped caring about if I offend others. When I found a fragrance that boosted my self-confidence, I started spraying as much as I needed to till I could smell it on myself (usually 2 to the neck). However, there was one time recently where I had a hunch people would take notice; I did my usual 2-to-the-neck and went down to the student service center at my college. I forgot the AC in there is weak so the air is pretty still. If I could smell it on myself, everyone I walked passed probably could, too. The girls were shooting me glances and the guys seemed to tense up as if I were a threat.

  13. #13

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Go for it man! Don't cheat yourself, treat yourself.

  14. #14
    Basenotes Junkie Trilby Lark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I am perhaps too conservative with my spraying and rarely receive comments or compliments. However, I can smell my scents from morning until night I rarely smell scents on others at work. Maybe I am the only one wearing any or others are also very conservative. I think I will experiment with heavier application.

  15. #15

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Increase the amount you apply by small increments. One spray is almost nothing, and I imagine you can barely notice it yourself at times.

    Try two sprays for a few days. But just so you don't get the wrong idea, spray somewhere where it won't go directly into your nose all day--that way you won't get tricked into thinking you over-sprayed. Maybe put one on the back of your neck and one on your chest or wrist. I find when you spray the neck, it can make it seem like you over-applied (even if you didn't) because the scent cloud hovers just under your nose.

    I think if you try this you'll notice that it's not as strong as you may have thought. And gauge other people's reactions, you'll probably see that they don't even notice.

    Then up it a little bit--two sprays and then walk through a mist. For really strong fragrances, this may be enough, but for softer ones you may even want to go up to 3 or 4 at some point. Do it little by little. And consider your surroundings. If you're going to be in close quarters indoors all day, two sprays might be all that you need or that you'll be comfortable with. But the more space you have and the more often your outdoors, the more liberal you can be.

    Whenever I have a new fragrance, I go light at first, to sort of gauge it. Then I sort of figure out where to go between 2 and 5 sprays. So it's okay to err on the side of caution with the idea that you can always increase it, like adding salt to food.

    I understand your desire to remain unobtrusive. There's nothing worse than sitting in a room full of people and getting the sudden sinking feeling that you've put on way too much cologne and that it's bothering everybody. I'd say more often than not when you feel that way it's paranoia, but even so....it's something you want to avoid.

    This is an interesting subject for me. I think each individual has a particular effect they want to create with their fragrance. Most of the time, I try to apply fragrances in a way that other people will catch them here and there, within several feet, but not to the point that they're a constant presence during our interactions. If someone is within a foot or two of me, I want them to be able to pick up on it. It's kind of like, you got close to me, and now you know a little something more about me you didn't know before...surprise! So what is the effect that you wish to create?

    Personally, if it's just a normal week of work and errands and things like that, I think one or two compliments for the week is good. That means people could detect it and enjoy it, but weren't overpowered by it. 3 or 4 compliments in a day and chances are you put on too much.

    So don't be afraid for other people to pick up on it. At the same time, don't go against the grain of your personality and what makes you comfortable. I think if you increase little by little, you'll eventually hit the sweet spot, where you feel confident about yourself, but you also get the chance to share this other dimension of your character with those around you.
    Last edited by Buysblind; 23rd December 2013 at 02:13 PM.
    Currently Selling: Vikt + Small Designer Lot: Really CHEAP prices

  16. #16

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Willanhanyard View Post
    Hey there,

    I never usually wear anything with more than one spray, and even that I am a bit scared of. I am always afraid that I will offend someone. I don't want to be that person who thinks they smell good but really doesn't. How can I get over this fear of offending people?
    Well, you gotta be you. Are you sure it's just a fear of offending people, rather than any other preference? Most of the time, people can't smell my perfume unless their nose is pretty close to my neck, that's the way I like it, I'm unrepentant and unapologetic about it. It's fine if everyone else on BN wants to cropdust an entire movie theater with their perfume when they walk by ( I'm teasing of course), but I do what works for me. Most of the time, 1-2 sprays.

    That said, sometimes I like to smell stronger, and mainly that was just developed through confidence in my scents and more importantly, confidence about how far out I was projecting. I don't want to to be in a choking cloud, but do want to smell nice from a few feet away, but am confident I have a handle on how to achieve the latter without accidentally inducing the former.

  17. #17

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Willanhanyard View Post
    Hey there,

    I never usually wear anything with more than one spray, and even that I am a bit scared of. I am always afraid that I will offend someone. I don't want to be that person who thinks they smell good but really doesn't. How can I get over this fear of offending people?
    Cannot recall I ever sprayed only 1 spray ........................even not with original vintage Kouros.
    My Top '10' : (In no particular order)

    - Dolce & Gabbana: Pour Homme (vintage)
    - Paco Rabanne: Pour Homme (vintage)
    - Loewe: Esencia/Pour Homme/Solo/7
    - YSL: Opium Pour Homme Edp
    - Jacques Bogart: Bogart Pour Homme (2004)
    - MPG: Santal Noble
    - Guerlain: Vetiver
    - Van Cleef & Arpels: Pour Homme
    - Hermes: Terre d'Hermes
    - YSL: Kouros (Fraicheur)

  18. #18
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I really don't care..
    I give every frag at least 5 squirts except Amber Absolute!!

  19. #19

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Concern yourself more, in enjoying the scent through the space of the whole day, stop thinking you're offending any one: just use balanced judgement....there will always be detractors you won't satisfy...and if you're so tentative then just spray a good blast in the chest were undershirt will restrain scent to a degree....enjoy
    "Thank GOD for the nose, for without it we would not be enjoying these beautiful created Scents" also Remember "Balance is everything and the key to appreciating "

  20. #20

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    There some really good advice here. I probably fall under the one spray category. I got bold and sprayed 2 of hugo yesterday. I admit to thinking that still, it wasn't enough. Depending on the fragrance, I think 3-5 sprays is where I should be aiming for.
    Is the juice worth the squeeze?

  21. #21

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    There's no need to put just one spray and be afraid. On the other hand i put maxumum of 5 sprays on me (an that is when it is a summer fragrance) I think that 5 sprays is a good amount for other people to be able to smell you and not to be offensive.
    There are people that put 10+ sprays and that is just rude. The people who put 10+ sprays are the "cologne guy" in every situation and I would hate to be "the cologne guy"

  22. #22

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Tony T View Post
    I give every frag at least 5 squirts except Amber Absolute!!
    You'd level anything in a ten block radius. That is some powerful stuff...
    Currently Selling: Vikt + Small Designer Lot: Really CHEAP prices

  23. #23

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Usually, trying to limit my fragrance wearing to 3-4 sprays (or 5-6 at most in the case of the very vapid and light scents). Especially when I know either a specifically fragrance-free occasion or environment comes up (but in this case, I can completely exclude wearing any fragrance) or simply interacting with people that might like fragrances or not, but especially if not knowing anything more about their scent preferences (should these preferences exist).

  24. #24
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Personally, I never go more that one spray to the chest or neck on any frag (including London). Using this method, you will rarely offend anyone in the office or at home. Its a very thin line between using too much cologne and too little, and its better to err on side of too little. People can smell you, and will rarely say anything to your face if you wear too much, hence the dilemma. If you dont believe me go to Twitter and type in the search bar Too Much Cologne, and you will be shocked at some of the comments regarding. Carrying an atomizer with you (find them cheaply on ebay), is a great way to freshen up you frag during the day if needed.
    An investment in knowledge pays the best interest

    - Benjamin Franklin

  25. #25

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Put six sprays on and walk out of your house.

    Most people couldn't care less what you are wearing.

    But a few people will make smart put-down comments about your scent (as they would anything else you and others do out of the ordinary). Read "When I say no I feel guilty" Manuel J. Smith, Bantam Books, to learn the verbal techniques to make them feel like dills for a change.

    And there will be a few who are genuinely offended that you should wear your scent strongly. Make sure you wipe these fascists out of your life, Your life will be less complicated and more peaceful.

    And there will be a very tiny number who are genuinely affected by your scent - e.g. have an allergic reaction or sneeze a lot. For most, the appropriate response is "Who cares - it's a big world, he or she can sit or stand somewhere else".

    But I've had to make allowances for my wife who sneezes uncontrollably when i wear Versace Black Jeans and some other amber scents. But with her it's a question of particular scents annoying her, rather than wearing scents loudly.
    Regards,
    Renato
    Last edited by Renato; 23rd December 2013 at 05:01 PM.

  26. #26

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    All this nonsense about not offending people.

    Daft notion if you ask me.

    Crack on and do what you want.

    If someone gets offended by something you say or do, isn't that their problem and absolutely no concern of yours?

  27. #27

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I'm usually a 3 to 4 spray guy, except for Interlude Man which I can only wear 2 sprays of! WOW, that stuff is loud. Marvelous, but loud.

    I don't worry about offending people. When it comes to how I dress or what fragrance I wear and how I wear it, for me, it's a matter of being the man I want to be.

    I want to look good.
    I want to smell good.
    But I don't want to be someone who looks or smells like he's desperate for attention. I'm not at all desperate for attention. I'm happy and confident, and I want to look and smell that way - like a man who is happy and confident without a need to draw attention to myself.

    So, to the OP, I ask this: Who are you? Think about the man you want to be and then have your style be a reflection of that. Dress accordingly, and that includes how you wear fragrance.

    Be the man you want to be.
    "Follow your nose. It always knows." -- Toucan Sam

  28. #28
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Arij View Post
    The Perfumisto Manifesto!
    DIG IT!



    BURN [MY NOSTRILS], BABY! BURN!
    * * * *

  29. #29

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Now no one wants to be this guy lol....:


  30. #30

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I saw a man walk into the large branch of Boots in UK and spray Chanel No. 5 about 25 times, all over his face, head and neck.

    He was pushing his testicles round in a wheelbarrow.

  31. #31
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    BURN [MY NOSTRILS], BABY! BURN! [/QUOTE]

    well said!

    never under 15!

  32. #32

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    This is subjective,

    But if you think of it, for a guy who owns 250+ bottles, what is
    he going to do with all of them if he does not spray generously,

    I do feel itchy if I just apply few sprays

  33. #33

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I've got two coworkers, one a man and one a woman, that everytime I sit in their chair to help them with their work I smell either body odor or something weird, like clothes that were stuffed way back in the closet for 10 years. And it isn't pleasant. People may not love what I'm wearing like I do, but they have to like it more than body odor or other unpleasant weirdness.

    I hope that people that get within a foot or two from me smell my fragrance - they don't have to be that close, and if they are, then they have to deal with smelling a fragrance that I like. I hope that I'm not the guy that clears out rooms and that my scent really is only smellable from a foot or two away...but there's no way to know...

    One strategy that I use is to wear something different pretty much everyday. In the years where I just wore whatever was given to me for Christmas/Birthdays, I don't recall smelling the fragrance much beyond initial spray. I think I was super used to it to where I couldn't smell it. And I could see how, in an effort to smell it myself, I could've fallen into the trap of spraying a bunch in the morning and throughout the day.

  34. #34
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Hunter View Post
    Now no one wants to be this guy lol....:

    LOL!

    I don't know if' I'd want to spend too much time around him, but I wouldn't mind running into him in the airport lounge. Clearly a character!

    Quote Originally Posted by joe mcclaine View Post
    I saw a man walk into the large branch of Boots in UK and spray Chanel No. 5 about 25 times, all over his face, head and neck.

    He was pushing his testicles round in a wheelbarrow.
    LOL! On the other hand, not so sure about this guy. Maybe his sister!

    Quote Originally Posted by Francolino View Post
    BURN [MY NOSTRILS], BABY! BURN!
    well said!

    never under 15![/QUOTE]

    I like 15, but I generally pick a day when I won't be seeing anybody for about 24 hours!

    Quote Originally Posted by salim96 View Post
    This is subjective,

    But if you think of it, for a guy who owns 250+ bottles, what is
    he going to do with all of them if he does not spray generously,

    I do feel itchy if I just apply few sprays
    I love going big - especially on scents that I own a big bottle, love to smell it, and nobody around. Work - that's a bit different. I do try to be somewhat less crazy there.

    Quote Originally Posted by cpa5oh View Post
    I've got two coworkers, one a man and one a woman, that everytime I sit in their chair to help them with their work I smell either body odor or something weird, like clothes that were stuffed way back in the closet for 10 years. And it isn't pleasant. People may not love what I'm wearing like I do, but they have to like it more than body odor or other unpleasant weirdness.

    I hope that people that get within a foot or two from me smell my fragrance - they don't have to be that close, and if they are, then they have to deal with smelling a fragrance that I like. I hope that I'm not the guy that clears out rooms and that my scent really is only smellable from a foot or two away...but there's no way to know...

    One strategy that I use is to wear something different pretty much everyday. In the years where I just wore whatever was given to me for Christmas/Birthdays, I don't recall smelling the fragrance much beyond initial spray. I think I was super used to it to where I couldn't smell it. And I could see how, in an effort to smell it myself, I could've fallen into the trap of spraying a bunch in the morning and throughout the day.
    Hey - I hear you about the "natural aroma" people. I would not mind if they used some cologne.

    I think you sound like you're pretty balanced. I try to stay reasonable for the society around me. I probably push it, but not too far. And when I'm wearing things that I'm not experienced with, I tend to rotate for safety, too, just like you do. I think that's a reasonable way to compromise, in case somebody simply doesn't like your fragrance. Change it up a lot.
    * * * *

  35. #35
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    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Hunter View Post
    I would look into fragrances that are light and inoffensive. Great thing about this hobby is that there are fragrances for everyone no matter what your taste or style is.
    This

  36. #36

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    The environment around you will influence the amount you spray but spraying a few more than normal won't hurt I think.

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  37. #37

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    I apply lightly, but I also always spray my wrist and sniff it vigorously... and end up looking like some sort of pervert. Anyway, I can catch my fragrance at will and people around me only get occasional whiffs. Works for me.

  38. #38

    Default Re: Afraid to go heavy with fragrances?

    ahhh, sometimes we live in a world that thinks so highly of how others will perceive us. I want to be deviant, and drench myself in perfume with wild abandon

    *life is too short not to be happy*

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