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  1. #31
    Dependent bigsteve's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    OctaVariuM... I am just like you, bro. I have a hangup about wearing anything that might be construed as feminine. I lean toward the very masculine scents, and am even thinking of getting rid of a couple I have that are a bit too powdery or sweet for me. And unisex or feminine just don't cut it.
    But this "frag" game is so subjective... and I don't begrudge those guys who wear/enjoy the fem or unisex scents. To each his own.

  2. #32
    Dependent OctaVariuM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by rubegon View Post
    But even if you never feel comfortable wearing feminines out, what's wrong with just enjoying them at home?
    Nothing, really. That's the nice thing. I figure I can work it out and eventually get more bold and wear it out at different times.

  3. #33

    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Many many fragrances that you think are feminine on a woman, isn't perceived feminine on a man and vice versa. I've gotten compliments on my "nice perfume" when I've worn Fahrenheit. People see you, they see a guy, and they won't assume that you're wearing a "women's fragrance" so they'll just react to whether or not they think you smell nice.

    There are some fragrances that I think are too "pretty" for a rugged masculine kind of guy to pull off, but they are rare.

  4. #34
    Dependent L'Homme Blanc Individuel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by OctaVariuM View Post
    So, ever since I've entered the fragrance community, I've found myself trying to avoid floral scents as they are associated with the females in my life and not what I consider to be something men should wear. However, there have been a few fragrances that come along time and again that I find to be absolutely stunning, but I have a hard time wearing them and shaking that feminine feeling.

    I'd love to know if anyone has experienced this and gotten past it so they could enjoy the scents and not care how they come off? I'm in college, and I can't say that I want women (or my male friends) thinking I smell like a girl in a negative way.

    I wish I was one of those people who can just comment and say "I don't care what others think, I wear what I like to wear, regardless of others gender associations."
    I think your question is perfectly reasonable, and it speaks to far more than just scents. It's about what we're used to and what we think is appropriate. Sometimes we're right. Sometimes we're wrong. But how to figure out the difference?

    I have a female friend with wavy hair. She grows it long because she thinks women are supposed to have long hair. One day, a stylist convinced her to cut it short into a sort-of pixie cut. She Looked AMAZING! ...buuuuuuuut, she couldn't get past feeling like a boy with a short haircut (even though it was very feminine). She grew it out again and looks kind of dumpy. Ah well.

    The trick is to find someone whose opinion you trust. When in doubt about how something smells on me (to anyone other than me, I mean), I have a few friends whose opinions I trust.

    Like you, I admit, I have issues with scents smelling too feminine for what I think I should wear. For me, it's that I'm single and enjoy dating. Feminine isn't the impression I want to give, but I've been surprised by how often women will rave about a scent on me that seems pretty feminine to me.

    As Izzie pointed out, it's pretty amazing how something can smell so different on different people, and how scent is only one piece of the puzzle people use to judge ho something smells, bizarre as that may sound. The more dressy the man, the easier it is to wear more stylish - and maybe even more feminine - scents. People see style and they then associate what they smell with that style. It's weird, but people do it all the time.

    So... if you love Noir de Noir, I'd say, dress up!
    "Follow your nose. It always knows." -- Toucan Sam

  5. #35
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    The only fragrance that I really like that I can't pull the trigger on is Chanel No 5. It's just to recognizable as a feminine scent for me to wear it.

  6. #36

    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    I perfectly understand your fear. I'm a gal leaning towards masculine scents simply because I prefer woody, smokey and leathery over floral. however I try to choose those that are not too in the face masculine and wear them for work also (lightly applied). Anyway, I also bought some more obviously male scents like bel ami. and these scents make me feel self-conscious sometimes. especially when someone comes close. some compliments on these scents by friends have given me more confidence. But these were perfumistas, doesn't count. however it was very comforting when my non-perfumista friend qualified l'air du desert marocain as very feminine on me, maybe too feminine for him to pull off. so people don't reqlly seem to identify the gender of a scent unless maybe it is a very well known scent.

    on the other hand I kind of got worried when I myself smelled a fume on a man which smelled sweet and powdery, very feminine. it was really weird. plus I smelled a cheap aftershave smell on different women (one was a very butch looking taxi driver, the other one a female loo

    - - - Updated - - -

    ...female looking stewardess...
    It came off as weird. maybe the notes were too obvioud plusvI didn't really like thevscents. but I wandered if gor instance bel ami comes off as strange on me...
    But you shouldn't worry about Noir de Noir, that's not too feminine.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I perfectly understand your fear. I'm a gal leaning towards masculine scents simply because I prefer woody, smokey and leathery over floral. however I try to choose those that are not too in the face masculine and wear them for work also (lightly applied). Anyway, I also bought some more obviously male scents like bel ami. and these scents make me feel self-conscious sometimes. especially when someone comes close. some compliments on these scents by friends have given me more confidence. But these were perfumistas, doesn't count. however it was very comforting when my non-perfumista friend qualified l'air du desert marocain as very feminine on me, maybe too feminine for him to pull off. so people don't reqlly seem to identify the gender of a scent unless maybe it is a very well known scent.

    on the other hand I kind of got worried when I myself smelled a fume on a man which smelled sweet and powdery, very feminine. it was really weird. plus I smelled a cheap aftershave smell on different women (one was a very butch looking taxi driver, the other one a female loo

  7. #37
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    It's funny, I bought Tom Ford's Black Violet and the SA threw in a couple of samples of Black Orchid. When I looked it up when I got home, it was classified as a feminine fragrance. It was an interesting choice from the SA. I don't think many SAs would have the courage to give a man something classified as a woman's fragrance.

    When I was first introduced to the world of some great fragrances by the knowledgeable basenoters, I did some further research on the recommended fragrance houses. There was one particular fragrance another SA showed me, "Portrait of a Lady". An extremely floral, sweet number. I ended up with a sample and for months was too scared to wear it - for two reasons, it was verging on sickly sweet and because I thought it was so feminine. I ended up trying it on a weekend when I went grocery shopping or something equally as banal. After wearing it a few times and getting used to it (and getting over the fear of wearing a woman's perfume) I know wear it to work and on the odd occasion, I even get a complement or two!

    My suggestion is to push your limits and see where you end up. Do the limit pushing somewhere where you're just an average joe - like grocery shopping - until your more comfortable to wear it where people know you. Explore and have fun.

  8. #38

    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    I felt the same with Noir de Noir. It smelled too much like a woman's perfume at first, but I was intoxicated with it. It's so dark, mysterious, and sensual. It's now one of my fave from the Private Blend line. I wear it with confidence and don't care if it is feminine smelling. That being said, you won't catch me rocking Chanel No 5...I'm not Brad Pitt.
    "I am a robot and I like cheese"

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  9. #39
    Basenotes Member Crow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Wore "Angel" to a Tractor Supply store today! Very old school country style environment. The girl at the check out definitely noticed! What did she think? Who cares?
    Last edited by Crow; 2nd December 2012 at 04:03 PM.

  10. #40
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    I've been harbouring these thoughts and feelings for so long mysefl that I decided to throw caution to the wind and just start giving it a go. Sampling and wearing what I pleased and what other wiser heads recommended. My eyes have been opened.

    You can read all about my experiences as a human guinea-pig trying out the womens scents for the guys on the thread 'what female scents are even deadlier on the male?'.

    So far I have to say so good and the reaction of others has been overwhelmingly positive.

  11. #41
    Basenotes Member Crow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Assiduosity View Post
    I've been harbouring these thoughts and feelings for so long mysefl that I decided to throw caution to the wind and just start giving it a go. Sampling and wearing what I pleased and what other wiser heads recommended. My eyes have been opened.

    You can read all about my experiences as a human guinea-pig trying out the womens scents for the guys on the thread 'what female scents are even deadlier on the male?'.

    So far I have to say so good and the reaction of others has been overwhelmingly positive.
    I just now found and read your thread. Enjoying your reviews, will be following along.

  12. #42
    Basenotes Member longstreth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    If boys came into this world smelling like Acqua di Giò and girls like Black Orchid, then I'd be a bit more wary of wearing the latter. But as it stands, I have no problem wearing—and loving—a "feminine" frag like Black Orchid because there's nothing intrinsically "girly" about it to me.

  13. #43
    Dependent Darjeeling's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by MrJack View Post
    It's funny, I bought Tom Ford's Black Violet and the SA threw in a couple of samples of Black Orchid. When I looked it up when I got home, it was classified as a feminine fragrance. It was an interesting choice from the SA. I don't think many SAs would have the courage to give a man something classified as a woman's fragrance.
    I read somewhere (sorry, don't remember the source) that in Australia men buy it more than women, so maybe not so strange.

    I think you can get used to it and build up the courage to wear scents marketed to women. I've still got hangups about it, and my preference is usually for dry, smoky and woody anyway.

    There are times when something with a light jasmine/white florals could be good. I enjoy l'ombre dans l'eau, but my wife accused me of smelling grandmotherly when I wore it (I blame the rose), so I try to avoid wearing it around her.
    Currently wearing: Tam Dao by Diptyque

  14. #44
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Darjeeling View Post
    I read somewhere (sorry, don't remember the source) that in Australia men buy it more than women, so maybe not so strange.

    I think you can get used to it and build up the courage to wear scents marketed to women. I've still got hangups about it, and my preference is usually for dry, smoky and woody anyway.

    There are times when something with a light jasmine/white florals could be good. I enjoy l'ombre dans l'eau, but my wife accused me of smelling grandmotherly when I wore it (I blame the rose), so I try to avoid wearing it around her.
    Increasingly Black Orchid seems to be sold as a unisex - more proof that even with expensive advertising if the houses try and throw something our way that doesn't sit right we can just ignore their marketing departments.

    Wear whatever you feel comfortable with and smells good to you - ignore the packaging and the preconceptions of others...

  15. #45

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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by MrJack View Post
    It's funny, I bought Tom Ford's Black Violet and the SA threw in a couple of samples of Black Orchid. When I looked it up when I got home, it was classified as a feminine fragrance. It was an interesting choice from the SA. I don't think many SAs would have the courage to give a man something classified as a woman's fragrance.
    Here in London, I smell it quite frequently, but always on men.

    Wear what you want; there are so few fragrances (like Chanel No 5) that are so well known that anyone would recognize them anyhow. And even with those, people's perceptions are affected by the fact that you're obviously a man - see the Angel story above.

    People who are really into perfume tend to overthink these things. Trust me, most people don't notice anything but themselves.
    Currently wearing: Shalimar by Guerlain

  16. #46
    Basenotes Junkie Profumo Saggio's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by David Ruskin View Post
    The only BS here is Marketing BS. Fragrance has no gender. If a man wears a fragrance (any fragrance) then, by association it will smell masculine on him. If a woman wears a fragrance (any fragrance) it will, by association, smell feminine on her.

    Also there is fashion in fragrance, and what, to one generation, will smell Feminine will, to another, generation smell Masculine. Jicky and Eau Sauvage are tow examples of this.

    Before the 20th century there was only unisex fragrance. Marketing realised that you could double your sales by inventing this artificial division.

    Wear what you enjoy. Fragrance is genderless.
    Thank you for saying this so well so I can save typing space and time.
    I don't have a signature fragrance. My signature changes a little bit every day, why shouldn't my fragrance?
    Currently wearing: H.M. by Hanae Mori

  17. #47
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    I have tried and tried again to dive into the feminine fragrance market. Can't do it. Just does not feel right. But I will continue trying.

  18. #48
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Profumo Saggio View Post
    Thank you for saying this so well so I can save typing space and time.
    These points are brilliantly made particularly about scents coming in and out of fashion. This goes not just for individual fragrances but for whole categories.

    Before the 20th century nearly all perfume was partly or even mainly floral in composition in Europe - because that was what was available - and was worn equally by men and when. It's only in recent times that iris and rose in particular have become associated with women.

    Chypres are a classic example - the classic being Mitsouko, which seems more and more to be worn by men as some young women seem to find it quite off-putting, old-fashioned and aggressive.

    Leather has gone on a similar journey, being and essential component in such feminine old timers as Cabochard and Tabac Blond it is now at the heart of such masculine ubiquities as Dior Homme and 1Million.

    Finally, aldehydes, increasingly a turn off to young women tutored on fruit, flower and sweet perfumes may ultimately cross the divide in scents like Comme de Gacons 2.

    Fashion will change, it has to, the perfumers depend on it doing so to keep the tills ringing.

    Stay true to yourself and follow your nose.

  19. #49
    Basenotes Junkie Profumo Saggio's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Ok kids, I'm taking No. 5 out for a public touring tonight. I've done Shalimar and Jasmal wearings but this is gonna be kind of fun I think.
    I don't have a signature fragrance. My signature changes a little bit every day, why shouldn't my fragrance?
    Currently wearing: H.M. by Hanae Mori

  20. #50
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Profumo Saggio View Post
    Ok kids, I'm taking No. 5 out for a public touring tonight. I've done Shalimar and Jasmal wearings but this is gonna be kind of fun I think.
    Interesting. Interesting.

    I've been wearing it all day - it's just passed midnight thirty here in London.

    I'll be posting my thoughts on the thread 'What female scents are even deadlier on the male?' tomorrow. Why not compare notes?

  21. #51

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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Profumo Saggio View Post
    Ok kids, I'm taking No. 5 out for a public touring tonight. I've done Shalimar and Jasmal wearings but this is gonna be kind of fun I think.
    Let us know how it goes!
    Currently wearing: Shalimar by Guerlain

  22. #52
    Basenotes Junkie Profumo Saggio's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Assiduosity View Post
    Interesting. Interesting.

    I've been wearing it all day - it's just passed midnight thirty here in London.

    I'll be posting my thoughts on the thread 'What female scents are even deadlier on the male?' tomorrow. Why not compare notes?
    Sounds like a plan.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Kagey View Post
    Let us know how it goes!
    I'm gonna have to do another over the weekend to get a true reaction from enough females for an accurate view of what other people think. Personally, I loved getting periodic whiffs of this masterpiece all night. Interestingly enough, it appears that my body chemistry has turned No. 5 into a very nice, light oriental vibe on my wrist when I give it the close up sniff after a few hours.
    I don't have a signature fragrance. My signature changes a little bit every day, why shouldn't my fragrance?
    Currently wearing: H.M. by Hanae Mori

  23. #53

    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Sometimes one just needs to smell like this. Just go for it.
    200px-Divine_in_Heaven_T-shirt.jpg

  24. #54
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Profumo Saggio View Post
    Sounds like a plan.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I'm gonna have to do another over the weekend to get a true reaction from enough females for an accurate view of what other people think. Personally, I loved getting periodic whiffs of this masterpiece all night. Interestingly enough, it appears that my body chemistry has turned No. 5 into a very nice, light oriental vibe on my wrist when I give it the close up sniff after a few hours.
    I'm going to post in full on this, but yes, after the initial stern, sexual scent I'd expected I did find that No5 mellowed in a way I just hadn't anticipated.

    A revelation.

  25. #55
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    I would feel uncomfortable wearing most women's scents - e.g. Jessica Simpson Fantasy, Sara Jessica Parker Lovely, Eva Longoria, Miss Cherie Dior etc - because I really don't like them on me. If I spray them on my wrist, it's a case of "eeek".
    Cheers,
    Renato

  26. #56

    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Renato View Post
    I would feel uncomfortable wearing most women's scents - e.g. Jessica Simpson Fantasy, Sara Jessica Parker Lovely, Eva Longoria, Miss Cherie Dior etc - because I really don't like them on me. If I spray them on my wrist, it's a case of "eeek".
    Cheers,
    Renato
    Let me just say that many women would have the same reaction to those fragrances.

  27. #57
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by senore01 View Post
    I have tried and tried again to dive into the feminine fragrance market. Can't do it. Just does not feel right. But I will continue trying.
    Keep trying there Senore01 - the range of female fragrances is just so vast, that there will be something beautiful out there waiting for you.
    Last edited by Assiduosity; 8th December 2012 at 08:14 AM.

  28. #58

    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Quote Originally Posted by Renato View Post
    I would feel uncomfortable wearing most women's scents - e.g. Jessica Simpson Fantasy, Sara Jessica Parker Lovely, Eva Longoria, Miss Cherie Dior etc - because I really don't like them on me. If I spray them on my wrist, it's a case of "eeek".
    Eew. I'm a woman, and with the possible exception of Lovely, I wouldn't wear any of those either. Not all women's fragrances are celebrity-scent pink-powder fluffballs.

    No. 19 extrait. _That's_ a woman's fragrance with more than enough power for any wearer.

  29. #59
    Super Member Assiduosity's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    Going back to the original post I'm reminded that you had a particular interest in florals - I've come to understand that in certain periods and cultures certain florals have been and are still continue to be regarded as very male or at least unisex fragrances.

    Perhaps these might be a good place to start - with rose, violet and iris. Lavendar is of course an herbaceous flower but is so widely used in male fragrance that it doesn't count.

  30. #60
    Basenotes Member Crow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Can you get used to smelling "feminine?"

    I have definitely gotten used to wearing feminine frags in the privacy of my own house. I would not wear it out in the world but tonight I'm wearing Ysatis. Very fem...no unisex here! I don't know why but it makes me happy to smell it. Some of the other female marketed frags I own are much more unisex. Ysatis and Fancy are probably the most utterly fem fragrances I own.

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