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  1. #1
    kumquat's Avatar
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    Lightbulb Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    How does it go for you when, or if you try to get your friends interested in perfume? Personally I have terrible luck. I just wanted to relate a few stories and whine a bit. One is the 'Grumpy Spouse ' syndrome. I try to suggest a perfume idea to a friend and the husband objects to the idea. Either he's a perfume hater because he's never smelled one he likes or a cheapskate or both. Have you ever encountered this? or maybe you have other stories to relate.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    I've never tried to get anyone into perfume, but over the years, I've dated women who became interested because they liked sniffing through my collection. And since so many from my collection (and collection of samples) are either unisex or male scents that would smell good on a woman too, if a date finds one she really likes, I always recommend she put some on. It's fun! I love when a casual date ends up turning into an evening at my place sniffing perfume and drinking wine. So! Much! Fun!
    "Follow your nose. It always knows." -- Toucan Sam

  3. #3

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    I had a tough time getting my middle son and my youngest interested in fragrances. It took years for them to appreciate what scents could add to their lives and how their lives could be enhanced positively by them. They have since come around and enjoy them although not with the same fervor as I. Never had the problem with my oldest son. He took to them immediately. My wife and daughters were also natural lovers of scents. Never attempted to influence a friend though.

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  4. #4

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Offering to try a scent it's such a social experiment, depending on many factors like personality, life experience / age / background:

    The easy ones, males looking for partners will like to know if women like it, but almost none grow an opinion. Kids tend to try at least one but their curiosity fades out quickly.
    Most grown ups will not be interested because their mainstream idea of perfume (mass media sexualization, taboos, religion), but for example, in an office, everyone will once people starts talking about it (contagion).
    'Open', educated and passionate people tend to show some enthusiasm, like asking questions, but it's really important how you approach them about it.
    We want a 'Niche' forum.

  5. #5
    kumquat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    The example I'm using is when, for instance I might be with a couple. She's not wearing any perfume, I whip out something from my purse for her to try. Then the husband immediately starts grousing that it's a terrible idea, even if the wife, my friend likes the chosen scent.

    i answer his objection that nothing smells good to him because he's not been smelling the good stuff. Then he complains that the prices I mention are too high ($100 or so). I point out that he appreciates good food and wine and he blusters and says that's different.
    Last edited by kumquat; 10th February 2014 at 01:34 AM.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Majority of my friends think it's stupid to have more than 1 frag..
    But they spend 100's on video games??
    To each's own..
    My Bro has strictly worn Curve Soul for the last 5 years..

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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    I have managed to get a lot of friends into niche perfumes.
    But its easy given that everyone here wears & loves perfumes.
    I merely pointed them in the direction of where niche-niche is sold here. (Not like Creed/Micallef niche thats sold most everywhere).
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  8. #8

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Only one family member is interested in fragrance, but not to the same extent.

    I buy toiletries for DH (aftershave balm/stick deodorant) and that is the only way he will wear scent. He wear fragrance only about five times a year.
    "No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this." Desert Rose by Sting and Cheb Mami, Album 1999.

  9. #9
    Basenotes Junkie Trilby Lark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    No converts here. I occasionally mention my interest in fragrance to friends or coworkers but usually people don't engage with the subject. My sister is a fragrance lover and my son shows some interest, which is nice. Fragrance doesn't seem to be a very popular hobby.

  10. #10
    Dependent Darjeeling's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    I don't bother.

    That and I already feel like hypocrite because in the past I've blasted friends for wearing "too much" scent because it set off my allergies. I couldn't sit in the same car with them, and would end up taking an anti-histamine and spending the evening at home by myself, constantly blowing my nose and wiping my eyes in a darkened room because even the light would make my eyes water uncontrollably.

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    My friends look at me strangely if I talk about scent, and can't understand why I always smell different. Some wear no scent at all and a few have worn the same scent (their signature) for years and years. I get an occasional "ewww" but otherwise they are tolerant of my obsession but uninterested in trying anything I might suggest.

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Oh, you have no idea. Sometimes I show them the Basenotes site!

    In my business, it's actually considered a no-no. But as a head sushi chef, no one gives me beef.

    Our flamboyant manager is now wearing One Million or A*men, and just knocking all of us out. (I introduced him to One Million, and now, he wants me to bring "that Haarlem one" from Bond to try....)

    I have introduced Bleu & L'Homme (YSL) to one of my younger chefs...(and I have recently made him a small sample of Pure Havane to try...)

    And another younger co-worker is starting to wear fragrances. (and I gave him a sample of Edition Blanche...yes, he picked it out after he looked at my wardrobe on BN...)

    Oh, and the other manager, the very, very conservative lady, the no-nonsense one, is now wearing any samples that I get from the Bond ladies that I don't care for.
    Last edited by 601red; 10th February 2014 at 04:29 AM.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Same. I keep my fragrances out of plain sight, people think it's weird. I get "what's wrong with you, why do you have so many?" a lot...from a friend who spends hundreds of dollars on autographed merchandise a month. To each his/her own is right. My girlfriend has gotten into it though and she's supportive of me. Loves the fact I'm somewhat of a creative type making my own fragrances as well.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tony T View Post
    Majority of my friends think it's stupid to have more than 1 frag..
    But they spend 100's on video games??

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Video games, pricey dinners , wine, cigars, high end stereo products, travel ...hell everyone has something they will drop real $ on .

    I came home from work the other day, and as I'm starting to change out of my suit I hear , " so all these perfumes are your moms?" and my 13 yr old daughter replys " no these are all my dads , including all the ones on my moms side of the cabinet, he bought all those also."
    " your dad is soooo cool!" LOL
    OFF SITE SALES, DECANTS ---Dior Privee, Chanel Exclusif, Creed, Maison Francis Kurkdjian, MOLECULE 01
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  15. #15

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Quote Originally Posted by willyb View Post
    Video games, pricey dinners , wine, cigars, high end stereo products, travel ...hell everyone has something they will drop real $ on .

    I came home from work the other day, and as I'm starting to change out of my suit I hear , " so all these perfumes are your moms?" and my 13 yr old daughter replys " no these are all my dads , including all the ones on my moms side of the cabinet, he bought all those also."
    " your dad is soooo cool!" LOL
    Yes, Willy, that is "sooo cool!"
    "No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this." Desert Rose by Sting and Cheb Mami, Album 1999.

  16. #16

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    My best friend has already converted. He purchases a lot of decants. I also hook him up with a few samples and decants. My lady also has got the fragrance bug and has a nice collection herself.

  17. #17

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    It's a bit like music -- ooh, whos that by??? I know what they are going to say when I tell them -- 'Never heard of them' and that will be that. Ok, you stick to Coldplay -- be happy.

    I don't bother anymore -- I actually don't want to tell them. I just say it's French

  18. #18
    Ken_Russell's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    In fact, the thread title sums up most of my story (stories) of this kind- the more interest for fragrance my friends, relatives and acquaintances already had in the first place, the likelier successful to get them into this hobby.

    What worked the best so far was a kind of "mixed approach": a combination of accompanying them to fragrance stores if they intended a purchase, gifting them with samples or even (if I was absolutely certain they liked a fragrance) full bottles, recommending them fragrance sites, blogs, other types of bibliography and references - including fragrance books in printed format, discuss fragrance with them extensively, as soon as they showed interest, needed an additional opinion etc.

  19. #19
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    I have turned two of my coworkers into semi-fumeheads. One of them is not ready to take the financial plunge into the niche side of the house although he does like New Haarlem(I gave him my old bottle) very much! He went from owning one bottle to six in a month! The other coworker has purchased 1 million and Hanae Mori HM per my recommendation and even asked me to go sniffing with him once! It was a very enjoyable experience. He is currently in California hunting down Lucky Scent to purchase Absolue pour le Soir as we speak(business trip)! He was truly enamored by it. I sprayed a sample of it on his hand, warned him of the opening and that was all she wrote!! My wife has the 'Grumpy Spouse' syndrome that kumquat referenced above. It is a challenge to get her to compliment any of my fragrances, so when she does it is a huge accomplishment! I rarely get compliments from her on any niche (I get tons of compliments from coworkers :POAL, Aventus, and Bentley for Men Intense as of late). The most recent and memorable unsolicited complimented I received from my wife was on Invasion Barbare. She said it smelled very good and "fresh".
    Last edited by FISS80; 10th February 2014 at 04:08 PM.
    Current faves (Subject to change at a moments notice!!):
    Roja Dove Diaghilev
    Amouage Interlude Man
    Pure Distance M
    Creed Royal Oud
    Xerjoff Kobe
    Absolue Pour le Soir
    MDCI Chypre Palatin
    MDCI Invasion Barbare
    Ronia J Oud Assam
    Goti Smoke Essenze

  20. #20
    Super Member cytherian's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Quote Originally Posted by kumquat View Post
    The example I'm using is when, for instance I might be with a couple. She's not wearing any perfume, I whip out something from my purse for her to try. Then the husband immediately starts grousing that it's a terrible idea, even if the wife, my friend likes the chosen scent.

    i answer his objection that nothing smells good to him because he's not been smelling the good stuff. Then he complains that the prices I mention are too high ($100 or so). I point out that he appreciates good food and wine and he blusters and says that's different.
    Yeah, that's a man steeped in prejudice that's for sure. And there might be an economical angle on that too (he doesn't want to be on the hook for buying his wife expensive perfumes, on her ever growing wish list).

    I've tried to talk up fragrances with a few people I know. Most are completely uninterested, even when I equate "engaging the senses" that is done so much with the eyes, ears, and tongue. Why not the nose? "Because you can't control it. I can't look away from a smell I don't like." OK, fair enough.

    I have only one friend that has bought some niche fragrances. But he's an ornery stubborn kind of guy (I'm friends with him for his positive qualities) and he's not interested in talking about fragrances. He just bought a few he likes and uses them occasionally. That's it. Nothing more.

  21. #21
    kumquat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Yes, it's disappointing, too because (and this happens with at least 3 couples I know) I'll ask the guy, well, you like my perfume don't you? They always say they do. They just don't want any for their wives. I don't get it. They say they can't find any they like and when I offer to let them try some of mine they freak out and say no, like a little squirt on the wrist will never come off. Or it's going to stink like an old fish or something.

  22. #22

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    A lot of people I know strongly dislike perfume (totally understandable), and I rarely wear anything that can be detected by anyone not in my skin, so it rarely comes up for discussion. As for convincing others, I've no need / interest to do so.

    With that said, I've discussed guerrilla and underground perfumery with a number of folks who are very involved in creative endeavors and artistic subcultures, and that's led to some interesting topics. Much of the revulsion toward perfumery, I've found, tends to stem from preconceptions of "cologne" or the kind of scents that project into other people's spaces. When told that there are non-standard / anti-perfume options available that use unusual and evocative materials, there's a bit more interest. But again, I've no interest in winning anyone over, personally.

  23. #23
    kumquat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Once, just for the hell of it , I gave a bottle of perfume to a friend, to see if I could light a fire under her. This is what went down; I happened to be wearing Ana´s Ana´s. (Unusual for its Madonna Lily note) Anyway, we were with a couple and the woman was someone I've known since grade school. She has worn Cool Water and nothing else for over 30 years- since High School. She said she figures it's 'inoffensive'. Personally, I never smell it on her. So that night her husband kept commenting on my scent. He REALLY liked it and asked me about it several times. So when I was at TJMax I picked some up for $16 and the next time I saw them I gave it to her as a gift. I could tell she was confused, like "What am I supposed to do with this?" I explained that her husband had liked it so it was kind of for him to enjoy. Anyway, I'm sure she never even tried it.

  24. #24
    kumquat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Quote Originally Posted by hedonist222 View Post
    I have managed to get a lot of friends into niche perfumes.
    But its easy given that everyone here wears & loves perfumes.
    I merely pointed them in the direction of where niche-niche is sold here. (Not like Creed/Micallef niche thats sold most everywhere).
    That must be fun for you. It's kind of like having someone to play cards with. No one plays Bridge anymore. (Neither do I, in case you're wondering.)

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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Quote Originally Posted by Trilby Lark View Post
    No converts here. I occasionally mention my interest in fragrance to friends or coworkers but usually people don't engage with the subject.
    That's been my experience too. Once in a while there might be a brief chat, but then it fizzles out. I don't press; don't want to bore people.

    Then again, I have friends who could talk for hours about stereo equipment, and I couldn't care less. I wonder if they're on stereo equipment forums asking the same question.

  26. #26
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    I sure don't want to bore or bother people either. It does come up now and again, though. Sometimes when we're at my house and they see my collection, or maybe when we're out and I spray something on.

  27. #27

    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    Quote Originally Posted by kumquat View Post
    Yes, it's disappointing, too because (and this happens with at least 3 couples I know) I'll ask the guy, well, you like my perfume don't you? They always say they do. They just don't want any for their wives. I don't get it. They say they can't find any they like and when I offer to let them try some of mine they freak out and say no, like a little squirt on the wrist will never come off. Or it's going to stink like an old fish or something.
    I think the fear of buying stinky perfume is due to their earlier experiences of buying cheap imitation perfumes that sometimes smell like old fish or something similar.

  28. #28
    Super Member ErinK's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting friends into perfume-Any success? Any interest?

    LOL @ your bridge comment and clarification, kumquat.

    Whenever I try to talk to anyone about perfume they will invariably say something like "I am allergic to perfume" (which I think is a cop out) or "Oh yeah me too I love Chanel but it is sooo expensive" (a. there are tons of Chanels, which one are you talking about? b. it's not that expensive) or something along those lines. I tried to get Jay (my ex boyfriend) interested in the perfumes I would wear and although he would tell me when I smelled good he would never offer any more descriptive comments. I have sort of attempted to get my mom into it (she's worn No. 5 forever and has recently switched to Coco Mademoiselle) and made her a decant of Noir de Noir when she went on a rose quest a while back (we ended up with Tea Rose which she loves)...but I don't think she's ever worn it.
    The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart. ~ Helen Keller

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