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  1. #31
    Basenotes Member Cigar Guy's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by Colin Maillard View Post
    Something's not clear though - the problem is the scent itself or the fact that your wife said that you could share a bottle? 'Cause she could say that virtually for any scent.
    Maybe in my mind my manhood was questioned?
    I took the comment as "oh, we can share the same cologne and also you could wear my panties when I'm not home." lol
    I've been happily married for 20 years and work in the automotive service industry. My name and the word feminine has never come up in the same conversation.
    I guess I'm probably taking it the wrong way, but I can't help but think about the famous Archie Bunker episode https://youtu.be/7dKpHtc9F9M
    I'll try to lighten up. lol
    Currently wearing: Bleu de Chanel by Chanel

  2. #32
    Basenotes Institution dougczar's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Just don't start wearing her clothes.
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  3. #33
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Congrats, dude! You're married to a smart woman. But I have to agree with hednic on this one: do whatever makes you feel good about yourself.
    Last edited by Diamondflame; 17th May 2017 at 03:11 PM.

  4. #34
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    I get this--I love to smell my wife (today she is wearing Fleurisimo) but do not want to smell like her--vive la difference, I say....
    Striving still to Truth unknown

  5. #35
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    ....another good way to make the point I made earlier!

  6. #36
    Super Member Funwithfrags's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    I'm sure in these days of post-binary sexuality, it's just a matter of time before someone markets a fragrance that is "suitable for all genders".

  7. #37

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Do I detect subtle notes of heteronormativity in this thread?

  8. #38
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by shadesofbleu View Post
    You are missing out on some amazing scents, then.
    Agreed. I wish someone would explain this to the SA's @ certain Nordstroms and Macy's that keep giving me odd/distrustful looks when I tell them I'm in the women's section for myself. There's way more Tom Ford's, all the Jo Malones and a lot of unisex stuff if you just walk across the store.
    Currently wearing: Eau Duelle by Diptyque

  9. #39
    Basenotes Member Cigar Guy's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by Felis View Post
    Do I detect subtle notes of heteronormativity in this thread?
    After googling it.....Yes, that is correct. lol
    Currently wearing: Bleu de Chanel by Chanel

  10. #40

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    I don't think I'd like to share a bottle with anyone, I also wouldn't want to smell the same as my wife (if I had one, still waiting for Jessica Alba to ask me out) but not because I'm opposed to unisex fragrances, quite the opposite as long as they aren't overly feminine. I just feel like I'd want my partner to love the way I smell but if she wore it, it would kind of take away from the experience

    Having said that, a few weeks ago something happened that I never imagined would ever happen. My mother came to visit and she smelled amazing, but not in a strictly feminine way, it was just a smell I immediately loved. It ended up being a French connection unisex scent which is basically just a bunch of citrus notes. I went and bought her a few bottles and even bought one for myself it was that good
    My top 30

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  11. #41
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by pluran View Post
    As a man, or any other person with an ounce of confidence, you would wear whatever you want.
    +1. I'd much rather wear something like vintage Mitsouko / Eau De Patou / Rochas Femme / No 5 EDC than a lot of the sickly male-marketed crap adorning the shelves nowadays.

    Quote Originally Posted by Possum-Pie View Post
    I never look/care if something is "Marked" Man/Woman/Unisex. I go by whether I like it or not.
    Exactly the way it should be
    Currently wearing: KL Homme by Lagerfeld

  12. #42
    Basenotes Member Cigar Guy's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Envy View Post
    I just feel like I'd want my partner to love the way I smell but if she wore it, it would kind of take away from the experience
    That is a very good point and I think that is partly my problem. I want my wife to like the smell of my cologne on HER after hugging ME. That would never happen if we shared the same bottle. That, and I really don't want ANYONE thinking I smell like a girl.
    Currently wearing: Bleu de Chanel by Chanel

  13. #43

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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    My Wife and I share many bottles. I don't see the problem.

    Once someone did say - are you wearing your wifes perfume?

    My reply was - no I'm wearing your wifes perfume.

    That shut him up.

  14. #44
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by thebeck View Post
    My Wife and I share many bottles. I don't see the problem.

    Once someone did say - are you wearing your wifes perfume?

    My reply was - no I'm wearing your wifes perfume.

    That shut him up.
    Love it! Double down on rhe rascal factor.
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  15. #45

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by dougczar View Post
    Just don't start wearing her clothes.
    My woman pretty much said the same thing about me wearing her clothes and feminine smelling perfume, she would be ok with it but wouldn't find it sexy.

    Some hobbies can't be shared with one's partner.

  16. #46

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    As the old adage has it:

    A couple that sprays together,
    stays together.

  17. #47

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    All together now. The Four Seasons, ' Walk like a man, talk like a man, a walk like a man my son.'

    I wear quite a few what are classed as masculine fragrances. I don't care, I love it, I buy and wear it. One male SA was surprised at what I was wearing as he wears it and it smelt totally different on me. Fresh and soapy.
    DONNA

  18. #48

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by Cigar Guy View Post
    That is a very good point and I think that is partly my problem. I want my wife to like the smell of my cologne on HER after hugging ME. That would never happen if we shared the same bottle. That, and I really don't want ANYONE thinking I smell like a girl.
    How do "girls" smell? I thought you were married to a woman by the way.

    Probably my last post to this thread as you are beginning to sound like Archie Bunker to me.
    After women, flowers are the most lovely thing God has given the world.

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  19. #49

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    My opinion is I look beyond the label. Some may agree with me and some may disagree but I do believe that there are fragrances that are masculine and there are fragrances that are feminine. Now the thing is that the fragrances will blend with your skins chemistry and the same scent may smell different on a man than a woman so what the scent smells like off the sprayer may actually wear differently if you decide to share a fragrance. As a male I don't like fragrances on me that are overly floral or fruity (which I feel suit a female better) so I don't wear them. At the moment I only have a couple unisex scents that are very good and if I went strictly by the bottle name I would never have gotten a chance to experience them. Those that come to mind happen to be Tom Ford Oud Wood and another is Mugler Cologne. If you like how it smells off the sprayer head give it a wear and judge then. But I also understand where you are coming from.
    Last edited by Titan; 18th May 2017 at 02:28 PM. Reason: typo

  20. #50

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Am I being cynical here, or do perfumers sometimes label scents as unisex just
    so they can sell more bottles??
    A woman without perfume is like a flower without a scent.

  21. #51

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by kewart View Post
    Am I being cynical here, or do perfumers sometimes label scents as unisex just
    so they can sell more bottles??
    Isn't it the opposite though?
    Perfumes started out as an attribute of the upper class and they didn't have gender specifications. But once the perfumery become available to the middle classes, fragrance companies had harder time selling perfume to the male population than to female. Men weren't used to it, just like they weren't used to care products. Companies had to sell the idea of men using perfume first. And thus the tropes of masculine perfumery were created.
    I know I'm terribly simplifying, but am I wrong here?

  22. #52
    Dependent Possum-Pie's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by kewart View Post
    Am I being cynical here, or do perfumers sometimes label scents as unisex just
    so they can sell more bottles??
    Really depends. Niche are almost all gender neutral. I've tried many that were just too floral for me though. It more depends what notes you like/dislike. My wife wears more floral and marine type notes, I wear more spice and oud type notes. Just preference.
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  23. #53

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Let us not forget Annick Goutal. A number of her range came in two different bottles the square one and then the tall ribbed glass one. Exact same fragrance in both but the square one was for men and in some cases retailed cheaper though the same amount of juice as the ribbed glass. Even recently elsewhere a question was asked "Was the perfume a different one in each bottle design?"
    DONNA

  24. #54
    Dependent Possum-Pie's Avatar
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by Felis View Post
    Isn't it the opposite though?
    Perfumes started out as an attribute of the upper class and they didn't have gender specifications. But once the perfumery become available to the middle classes, fragrance companies had harder time selling perfume to the male population than to female. Men weren't used to it, just like they weren't used to care products. Companies had to sell the idea of men using perfume first. And thus the tropes of masculine perfumery were created.
    I know I'm terribly simplifying, but am I wrong here?
    I live in a working-class area. Rural but 1/2 hour to a modest sized city. Almost no men wear fragrance except on a 'special occasion'. There are some young Latino men who wear the most popular/trendy dept. store fragrances, and some African American men who do the same. Even most women around here won't wear fragrance except on a special occasion. They tend to own 1 bottle, that get's taken out once in a while, and is usually under-applied.
    [SIZE=]See my Sale thread for partial bottles/samples Zoology, Penhaligon, Montale, marc de la morandiere, many others! [/SIZE]
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  25. #55
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by Felis View Post
    Isn't it the opposite though?
    Perfumes started out as an attribute of the upper class and they didn't have gender specifications. But once the perfumery become available to the middle classes, fragrance companies had harder time selling perfume to the male population than to female. Men weren't used to it, just like they weren't used to care products. Companies had to sell the idea of men using perfume first. And thus the tropes of masculine perfumery were created.
    I know I'm terribly simplifying, but am I wrong here?
    I think this is basically correct. Fragrance gender was largely a marketing opportunity. It is upon closer examination of the idea that one sees it as a typical "both sides are correct" situation.

    Fragrance in a culture has two options - uniformity or polymorphism. African tribes show both right now, and history shows both in Western society at different times. So arguments for strong natural dimorphism pretty much go to the back of the line. Depending on what are the social forces impinging on fragrance, it can behave differently.

    I contend that radical abundance of aroma chemicals in Western society in the late 19th and early 20th centuries allowed - via a proliferation of fragrance options - for a combination of strong but weakening existing social dimorphisms plus a weak but detectable olfactory preference dimorphism to emerge visibly and express itself as weak dimorphism in fragrance wear through fragrance marketing.

    In other words, in the question of whether gender created the marketing, or marketing created the gender, the messy answer is both.

    Cutely, it's analogous to what was happening in spectroscopy at the same time, where single bands of color in the spectra of elements showed splitting under increased resolution.
    https://cologniac.com - raging for the machines
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  26. #56
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    I am curious also for the OP's other reasons, if he has others, for not wanting to wear unisex frags. I can understand not liking a particular scent and not wanting to wear it.

    And if any man doesn't want to be 'wearing' a fragrance that a woman wears then he should shower (and change clothes) immediately after hugging or being intimate with a scent wearing woman as he will be wearing to some degree also. I personally wear fragrances marketed as unisex and as for females and enjoy them as much as many of those marketed for males. Not that it should be a reason for me to choose certain fragrances to wear one way or another but I am a heterosexual male.
    Last edited by kbe; 19th May 2017 at 05:55 PM.
    we have seen the enemy...and he is us.-Pogo
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  27. #57

    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    How someone interprets a fragrance and how it suits someone's version of masculinity just makes it less clear-cut than wearing panties, I reckon.

    Someone can claim that Dior Homme is totally masculine as he sees himself as a suave Jude Law kind of guy. Someone else will interpret the smell in a different way and/or have a different view on what's mascuilne. It would be harder to wear this and to say it's masculine.


    Whilst this could perhaps be unisex


    Typical masculine?


    Women probably have a bit more wiggle room than men when it comes to perfumes and underpants.

    Re smelling of women's perfume after hugging, etc. I don't really see a contradiction there. He'd probably be happy for his woman to smell (somewhat) of men's perfume after she hugged him but might not enjoy it if she completely smells of it before she did as he wouldn't find it attractive. Personally I wear some women's perfumes but even I wasn't too wild about a unisex perfume my girlfriend had that smelled like a men's perfume to me. It's not a real problem, of course, but I much prefer her other perfumes (and they're not sweet, florals but still smell more feminine and attractive to me).
    Last edited by Rüssel; 19th May 2017 at 06:34 PM.

  28. #58
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by kbe View Post
    I am curious also for the OP's other reasons, if he has others, for not wanting to wear unisex frags... .
    Oh Jeez. Next we will be putting the OP on the couch and pretending that sexual insecurities and mental woes can be cured by application of Greek myths to his private parts. That will get us nowhere. Repression is a crock, transference is a shell game, and penis envy is a pipe dream.

  29. #59
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    Quote Originally Posted by schnozz View Post
    Oh Jeez. Next we will be putting the OP on the couch and pretending that sexual insecurities and mental woes can be cured by application of Greek myths to his private parts. That will get us nowhere. Repression is a crock, transference is a shell game, and penis envy is a pipe dream.
    ..and projection. Let's not forget projection.
    we have seen the enemy...and he is us.-Pogo
    Currently wearing: Sycomore (new) by Chanel

  30. #60
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    Default Re: As a man, I just can't bring myself to wear a unisex scent....

    ... merely a chimera

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