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  1. #1
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    Default And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Those who have read earlier threads of mine know that this started when I did a test wear of Quadrille....which prompted a co-worker to complain about my smell. Since that incident I've been asked by a supervisor to refrain from wearing any perfumes and minimize any scents I wear in the office. I felt I had a right to know who complained, but was told to just stop to keep the peace. I mentioned to my supervisor that this last week I haven't worn any perfumes at all since I've had a cold (and couldn't appreciate it anyhow) and if the complaints came from the last week or so - it wasn't me that was wearing any scent. The only thing I could think of was I went back to Kérastase shampoo and conditioner which has a light fragrance, but that is it.

    I had this happen in a previous office about 10 years ago and when the complainer left, I went back to wearing perfumes without any issues or complaints. What infuriated me though was right down the hall someone has one of those jarred candle warmers and I'm stuck smelling the scent of pumpkin spice on overload coming down the hallway or whatever candle they choose to 'melt' that day and that is considered 'okay' since most people are okay with it (they are not). It's a case of 'rules for thee but not for me' scenario.

    I just needed to vent on here and why I haven't been on Basenotes much. Since I'm regulated to wearing perfume at night and on the weekends now it sucked my one enjoyment and hobby from me. I understand I can still enjoy it when at home, but make work miserable yet again. I know I'm not going to win this fight should I pursue it at work, so I feel the best course of action is to truly go perfume free at work and keep tabs on when someone complains about my 'scent', at which point I can build a case of harassment should I pursue that path.
    Something something....something....
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  2. #2
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Boy, I'll tell ya - this just burns me up!!! I really feel bad for you. And I curse the bloody a**hole who's making your life less enjoyable. I mean work sucks for most folks as it is and this just tears it, when pussys can't tell you to your face, that your perfume bothers them. That, is just it. I believe you are working with a coward. The fact that YOU have to tolerate some crappy, fake pumpkin spice wax melt vomit, and That is deemed okay? Ludicrous....
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  3. #3
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    So sad to hear your story! Perhaps give ”naturalness” a try? Skip deodorant and the morning toothbrush session for a while. Maybe after a while they want the ”old you” back...
    "Wonderfully wild, eminently civilized" - Derby by Guerlain

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  4. #4

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    A citrus fragrance should get no complaints

  5. #5
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by CutSmut View Post
    No, but seriously if your company is going to try and impose that on you then you're better off leaving. Of course you probably won't, but why allow these people to further crush you under their boot?
    Perhaps because some people need a job to pay the rent/mortgage and keep their health insurance, and explaining to prospective new employers that you quit your last job over your perfume might not encourage them to take you on.
    Currently wearing: Coriolan by Guerlain

  6. #6

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    I have a niece who insists she is allergic to perfume. That's like saying you are allergic to food. You are allergic to some perfume note or notes; you are not allergic to all of them.

    I wonder if it is even thinkable that one could take a bunch of samples or decants or small bottles to work and go over them with ones co-workers like a little sniff party in the lunchroom to allow your co-workers to choose scents that they find acceptable or no.

    Some people just hate scent no matter what. You cannot wear fragrance in any medical or health center around this area at all.
    How do you know what a French whorehouse smells like?

  7. #7

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by Zilpha View Post
    I have a niece who insists she is allergic to perfume. That's like saying you are allergic to food. You are allergic to some perfume note or notes; you are not allergic to all of them.

    I wonder if it is even thinkable that one could take a bunch of samples or decants or small bottles to work and go over them with ones co-workers like a little sniff party in the lunchroom to allow your co-workers to choose scents that they find acceptable or no.

    Some people just hate scent no matter what. You cannot wear fragrance in any medical or health center around this area at all.
    I can understand a medical center I suppose.

    What people hate is not fragrance and they're not allergic if this was true then they wouldn't be able to use 100% of the cleaning and hygiene products they use. What they hate is people who dare to think they have a right to at all interact with them without their explicit consent, even in a passive way such a scent. They hate the idea another "individual" is imposing their will on them. This angers them so much that they cannot help but be forced to impose their will on everyone else; and since it's easier to tell someone not to do something then being nuanced, and these corporations know you will bend the knee to them, they take away yet another expression of self.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Sorry to hear that. It's unfortunate that you had to deal with such an intransigent office environment. Although I am no longer involved in the day to day events in my firm, I had more than 200 hundred employees working for me in two offices with many people wearing fragrances and there were never any complaints lodged . I guess I was lucky, or maybe they were afraid to voice their concern since I always wore fragrance.
    Remember that while it is perfectly acceptable to criticize the content of a post - criticizing the poster is not.
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  9. #9
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    I would file an official complaint about the candle-warmer scents you are subjected to. Fair is fair. I had a colleague that used one of those things and I had to ask her to stop as it was so nauseating. She understood and complied.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Sorry about your situation Kitty2Shoes. That’s very frustrating!

    Quote Originally Posted by hednic View Post
    I guess I was lucky, or maybe they were afraid to voice their concern since I always wore fragrance.
    This is funny. Yeah, bring it to DA BOSS.

  11. #11

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Deleted some bickering; let's keep to the topic, please.
    No baiting/trolling. No insults. No politics. Read the Code of Conduct.

  12. #12
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by hednic View Post
    I guess I was lucky, or maybe they were afraid to voice their concern since I always wore fragrance.
    Checklist Item #1 for next job interview: make sure the boss wears perfume.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by pelle View Post
    So sad to hear your story! Perhaps give ”naturalness” a try? Skip deodorant and the morning toothbrush session for a while. Maybe after a while they want the ”old you” back...
    I love this idea...
    “To think I can go daily and not smell the same, while others go daily smelling of natural BO hahahaha!”

  14. #14
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    Default And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by hednic View Post
    Sorry to hear that. It's unfortunate that you had to deal with such an intransigent office environment. Although I am no longer involved in the day to day events in my firm, I had more than 200 hundred employees working for me in two offices with many people wearing fragrances and there were never any complaints lodged . I guess I was lucky, or maybe they were afraid to voice their concern since I always wore fragrance.
    Although our leadership circumstances are far different (currently over 58 people, with the most being 104 at another location), I can sympathize with the notion that some people will be afraid to voice their opinion to the boss’s face regarding fragrance or they just tolerate it because it’s their leader. With my current role, I spend a lot of time indoors and outdoors. But most people know I’m into fragrance, and I make it a point for those close to me to know to please let me know if I’ve went too heavy on the trigger or wearing something brash. Also, I try to be thoughtful towards others, and if we will be in close quarters on a particular day, and not just wear whatever I damn well please. (Which, I know your tastes Hednic and your fragrance choices typically wouldn’t be an issue anyways.)

    I’ve had a few instances that one employee has complained about another’s smell, on both ends of the spectrum. In one situation, a gentleman used to bathe in vintage Old Spice. I spoke to him and respectfully pointed out that while he smelled glorious it was a bit too loud and asked if he could dial it back a bit. Turns out, he didn’t realize how strongly he was projecting since his sense of smell had declined. He was appreciative of the respectful way I communicated with him and would routinely ask if he was putting off too much smell. No more complaints. On the other end of the spectrum, I had to speak to an employee that stunk. That was a more difficult conversation to initiate. There’s just no easy way to say, ‘you smell like you need to go wash your ass!’ As it turned out, the employee had a medical condition which caused him to stink. Instead of just telling him to do something about it, I genuinely assisted him with finding a solution that made him tolerable to be around during the funkiest parts of the day.

    I guess my point is, I feel the OP’s leader could’ve done a better job understanding the situation and communicating. The offended employee seems they didn’t want conflict, which is part of the reason why they didn’t approach the OP. Plus most companies keep that kind of stuff confidential. The offended employee could just be a ‘hater’ and trying to use fragrance as a means of ‘attack’, OR, it could be that they just don’t like the fragrance the OP was wearing. Heck, we can’t all agree on what smells best among us aficionados. In any case, leadership has to give due diligence to the matter to determine what the real issue is and then find a sensible solution overall. Sometimes the solution will be simply to adjust the type of fragrance or the amount applied. Sometimes fragrance will have to be omitted. There’s just too many variables to give one blanket answer. But once the decision is made, the leader needs to communicate things in a way that is respectful and reasonable, and understandable. Sorry you had to deal with it, OP!

    Now I dare someone to tell me I can’t wear fragrance to work!!!!
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  15. #15
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Hmm some people might say unless the company has specific rules governing acceptable work attire /accessories, your supervisor has no real business telling you what you can or cannot wear. Play up the ‘inclusivity’ or ‘anti-discrimination’ card if the company has a clear policy on them. Your supervisor might be infringing them out of ignorance. Otherwise the only other way out is to win your supervisor over to your camp.

    Even if I wasn’t a fraghead I can’t see a reason why anyone would take offence to any fragrance worn discreetly unless he/she is hellbent out to get you. Surely a compromise can be made, with inoffensively low sillage work-appropriate fragrances for instance.
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by cazaubon View Post
    I would file an official complaint about the candle-warmer scents you are subjected to. Fair is fair.
    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondflame View Post
    unless the company has specific rules governing acceptable work attire /accessories, your supervisor has no real business telling you what you can or cannot wear.
    Wholeheartedly agree with these! Fairness & transparency should apply to everyone.

    So sorry this has happened to you Kitty, it totally sucks.
    "What is this secret connection between the soul, and sea, clouds and perfumes? The soul itself appears to be sea, cloud and perfume..." - from Zorba the Greek by Nikos Kazantzakis.

  17. #17
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Pushing the issue towards a policy ruling might result in an outright fragrance ban. Maybe find a way to enjoy your fragrance privately such as a dab on the wrist that you can sniff throughout the day. Just my two cents.
    Note to self: Choose being kind over being right, and you’ll be right every time.
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  18. #18
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    That's miserable. The working day can be dull enough, but when the only olfactory interest is a synthetic smelling candle - urgh! (I thank my lucky stars we don't have that kind of mindset in perfume-friendly France.)

    Have you thought of (lightly) spraying perfume onto a handkerchief or silk square and either carrying it with you or leaving it out on your desk? You wouldn't be wearing it, after all - and I can't see the difference between that and the offensive candle warmer.

  19. #19
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    That is very unfortunate. I think anyone of us, if to be in that situation, would be furious. You just got to stay positive and take the high road on this situation.
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  20. #20

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    What a sad state of affairs.

    Here's a short article about fragrance sensitivity I read not long ago:

    https://www.theguardian.com/lifeands...ealth-problems

    I do understand that some people have genuine allergic reactions to scent / perfume, and that their complaints are usually not taken seriously, same as people with genuine food allergies. But this usually happens because other people high-jack their condition without ever suffering from it. People complain about scents or avoid certain foods / ingredients because of a perceived health benefit, or in the case of perfume due to a dislike of the scent, without actually being physically distressed by it.

    Now separating the wheat from the chaff is difficult. I mean, you could insist that people bring in a doctor's note if they are genuinely allergic, but how many work places are going to enforce this due to the additional admin required? And how are you going to diagnose a fragrance allergy if there are thousands of different ingredients, every one of which can cause a reaction?

    If I were put into a position where I was told to minimise fragrance at a place of work, I'd probably only use small amounts on my wrists. If I were told to cut it out completely... to be honest, I'm not quite sure what I would do. I do wear fragrance to work, but don't really overspray, and commute for a couple of hours before reaching my office so the scent has time to calm down.

  21. #21
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Another way could be diving into obscure "non-perfume" perfumes. A light application of something from Comme des Garcons synthetic series might be an option, or Tauer l´Oudh. You would smell, and hopefully enjoy the experience, and probably your coworkers won´t associate your smell to perfume...

    Again, so sorry to hear about your situation.
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  22. #22
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    I don't understand why the same person(s) who complain about intermittent exposure your perfume, have no problem with scented candles infusing the entire workplace. I would certainly raise that issue with your supervisor.

  23. #23

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Im inclined to feel sympathy in these incidents but i've seen them on facebook frag groups and then you learn the person was an oversprayer. BRB post from two months ago by the same person is a selfie on an airplane with the caption "6 sprays of Tom Ford Oud Wood! They're gonna love me on this plane!"

    so much degeneracy.
    Don't stank.
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  24. #24
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by Nastka View Post

    Here's a short article about fragrance sensitivity I read not long ago:

    https://www.theguardian.com/lifeands...ealth-problems
    Appreciate the link. Interesting.
    Remember that while it is perfectly acceptable to criticize the content of a post - criticizing the poster is not.
    Mean spirited, nasty, snide, sarcastic, hateful, and rude individuals on Basenotes don't warrant or deserve my or other Basenoters' acknowledgement or respect.

  25. #25
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    That's a bummer.
    <div class="bnsotd"><b>Currently wearing:</b> <a href="ID26148387.html"><img src="http://www.basenotes.net/photos/products/33/26148387-7393.jpg"> Carven L'Eau Intense by Carven</a></div>

  26. #26
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    This goes to the issue of why people wear fragrances in the first place - have you considered "starting" your day when you arrive home from work? I do that but for reasons other than workplace restrictions; I take advantage of working in an informal environment and simply prefer to save the best for myself - I come home from work, enjoy a relaxing shower and shave, apply a nice fragrance then enjoy my evening activity. Whatever is left over by morning is what my co-workers get - I roll out of bed, splash my face with water, throw on some clothes and I'm out the door.

  27. #27
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by Bonnette View Post
    I don't understand why the same person(s) who complain about intermittent exposure your perfume, have no problem with scented candles infusing the entire workplace. I would certainly raise that issue with your supervisor.
    If I am reading the OP correctly, the scented candle scenario was from a previous office about 10 years ago, not the current office.

    I'm glad I have my own office and spent about 85% of my day in it. It allows me to not think much about what scent I am wearing to work, although I am a two spray max person.
    Currently wearing: Aventus by Creed

  28. #28
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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by bklow View Post
    If I am reading the OP correctly, the scented candle scenario was from a previous office about 10 years ago, not the current office.
    You are absolutely right, I conflated the two experiences. Thank you!

  29. #29
    Always be smelling

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    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    I would just not bathe for a few days , spray some musk/civet/skunk juice and stink up the whole place. Then when people complains I can say I have BO issue but was told not to wear fragrance.
    Problem solved.
    Beauty needs no morality or righteousness.
    It, like nature, does not give a shit

  30. #30

    Default Re: And it happened - asked not to wear perfume to work

    Quote Originally Posted by Diamondflame View Post
    Even if I wasn’t a fraghead I can’t see a reason why anyone would take offence to any fragrance worn discreetly unless he/she is hellbent out to get you. Surely a compromise can be made, with inoffensively low sillage work-appropriate fragrances for instance.
    Key word bolded there. I love wearing perfume, so I understand why other people wear it. I also understand that not everyone knows how to apply it appropriately.

    Quote Originally Posted by wood&leather View Post
    Im inclined to feel sympathy in these incidents but i've seen them on facebook frag groups and then you learn the person was an oversprayer. BRB post from two months ago by the same person is a selfie on an airplane with the caption "6 sprays of Tom Ford Oud Wood! They're gonna love me on this plane!"

    so much degeneracy.
    Yep. Basically this.

    What I've found is that, usually, if people are complaining about someone's perfume, then that person is wearing too much.




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