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  1. #211

    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Bavard View Post
    "We need more Ambrox!" said the new CEO.
    "Pineapple was 10 years ago!"
    "Look at Mont Blanc and Dior,
    if you want to know more."
    "It's all about Ambox, you know?"

    Creed in their time made some great scents
    Albeit mainly for gents
    Whether perfumed by Bourdon
    Olivier??? or Herault
    With my stash of vintage Portugal I'm content
    Currently wearing: 154 by Jo Malone

  2. #212
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Bavard View Post
    Urine? Ah, you mean the indolics!
    And, yes, that other stuff, frankly, was bollocks.
    I like my white flowers neat,
    That stuff was too icky sweet.
    And, no, I am not an indole-a-holic!
    Denying that you're Indole-a-holic
    Decries a fact apostolic
    Religion aside
    One shouldn't deride
    A secretion deliciously diabolic
    Last edited by kbe; 3rd March 2020 at 04:58 PM.
    3x2(nyz)4a

    Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
    --John Keats

  3. #213
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by kbe View Post
    Denying that your Indole-a-holic
    Decries a fact apostolic
    Religion aside
    One shouldn't deride
    A secretion deliciously diabolic
    Stay quiet with an onslaught of sucrose?
    Even if the person gets too close?
    My philosophy's simple:
    My body's a temple,
    And I have to look after my glucose.

  4. #214
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Bavard View Post
    Stay quiet with an onslaught of sucrose?
    Even if the person gets too close?
    My philosophy's simple:
    My body's a temple,
    And I have to look after my glucose.

    Checking sugar's a worthwhile task
    As is currently wearing a mask
    But let's not forget
    Not a one of us yet
    Spritzes glucose on skin from a flask!
    3x2(nyz)4a

    Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
    --John Keats

  5. #215
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Despite varied and numerous entreaties,
    To have someone still overdosing on sweeties,
    It seems my objection,
    Was met with rejection,
    And the person doesn't mind diabetes.

  6. #216
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Bavard View Post
    Despite varied and numerous entreaties,
    To have someone still overdosing on sweeties,
    It seems my objection,
    Was met with rejection,
    And the person doesn't mind diabetes.

    C6 H12 O6
    Found in the cereal Kix
    Also Kechup and Colas
    May rot yer pre-molars
    And require an insulin fix
    3x2(nyz)4a

    Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
    --John Keats

  7. #217

    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    (One for the Brits)

    The Doctor prescribed him Lucozade tablay
    ��Bo’selecta�� for MJ was his sweetay
    Its a classic UK thing
    Lots of ‘chamones’ and ‘hEhes’
    And ol’ Jacko loved him some rhinoplastay
    Currently wearing: 154 by Jo Malone

  8. #218
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    There once was a lad from Seville
    Who rubbed himself with orange peel
    ‘Mmmm, juicy, yet bitter!‘
    Declared the young critter
    ‘With guaranteed chica appeal!’
    Last edited by Le vagabond; 4th March 2020 at 11:25 AM.

  9. #219
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Morning came on with a Bang
    Marc Jacobs, that is, did hang
    'Round my body like white
    On rice, through a night
    Of damnable sturm und drang
    3x2(nyz)4a

    Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
    --John Keats

  10. #220
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    I’ve never tried that one called Bang
    Or anything by Vera Wang
    I’m not in the gang
    Cannot do your thang
    Don’t shoot me down, bang bang

  11. #221
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    The Game swept David off his slump
    So he smiled, no longer the chump
    His partner played dummy
    This wasn't gin rummy
    Dave shouted: "20!...20 no trump!"
    3x2(nyz)4a

    Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
    --John Keats

  12. #222
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    There once was a young man from Bath
    Who stole Marcel Rochas' moustache
    Stuck it on his face
    And ran off at pace
    Whilst poor Marcel just sat there, aghast!

  13. #223
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    At least it wasn't Madame
    And Marcel still has his Femme
    C'est un peu de Mystere
    His Moustache is where?
    Hopefully he still has a dram

  14. #224
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Le vagabond View Post
    There once was a young man from Bath
    Quote Originally Posted by Bavard View Post
    At least it wasn't Madame

    Hurrah, they're back!

  15. #225
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    I filled up my pool with cologne
    Then called up Sylvester Stallone
    We bathed in the scent
    And smelled heaven-sent
    Whilst respecting a two meter zone

  16. #226
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Do mosquitoes get high on perfumes?
    As the fly about in our rooms
    And can they tell
    Dior from Chanel?
    Who cares? Take that with this broom!

  17. #227
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    “Now this” cried the woman in suede
    “Is how perfume should be made!”
    All dressed up in yellow
    With a voice hardly mellow
    Said “It tastes like good pink lemonade!”
    3x2(nyz)4a

    Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
    Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
    --John Keats

  18. #228
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by kbe View Post
    “Now this” cried the woman in suede
    “Is how perfume should be made!”
    All dressed up in yellow
    With a voice hardly mellow
    Said “It tastes like good pink lemonade!”
    Sounds like a good one for summer,
    Maybe even a real up-and-comer.
    A lemonade, pink
    Should sell well, I think
    I appreciate the insider rec' from her!

  19. #229
    Always be smelling

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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Cook.bot View Post
    Hurrah, they're back!
    The talent in this great thread
    Makes American idol look so sad
    So I went to meet Simon
    To get him to sign us
    "Alas", he said " I can't, I smell too bad"
    Beauty needs no morality or righteousness.
    It, like nature, does not give a shit
    Currently wearing: Paradigm by Avon

  20. #230
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Le vagabond View Post
    I filled up my pool with cologne
    Then called up Sylvester Stallone
    We bathed in the scent
    And smelled heaven-sent
    Whilst respecting a two meter zone
    You could bust out a big, lovely beast!
    That'll cover two meters at least!
    Assuming all being equal,
    With Sly, there's a sequel.
    Can't wait 'til the next one's released!

  21. #231
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by epapsiou View Post
    The talent in this great thread
    Makes American idol look so sad
    So I went to meet Simon
    To get him to sign us
    "Alas", he said " I can't, I smell too bad"
    Last I checked, Simon was due
    For a full makeover (or two!)
    Do up his hair
    And an old-school fougere
    I'm sure he'll feel good as new

  22. #232
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    I'm not sure there's a perfume named 'Rocky'
    If there was, I'm damn sure it'd be cocky
    A scent for a jock
    With pecs made of rock
    And a cock (due to drugs) somewhat floppy

  23. #233

    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Le vagabond View Post
    I'm not sure there's a perfume named 'Rocky'
    If there was, I'm damn sure it'd be cocky
    A scent for a jock
    With pecs made of rock
    And a cock (due to drugs) somewhat floppy

    Training in snow just wasn’t enough
    Juiced Drago; he hammered Rock rough
    Balboa resorted to ‘the blue’
    With a rock hard kazoo
    Won the fight n Adrian’s up the duff!
    Currently wearing: 154 by Jo Malone

  24. #234
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    During the great Corona virus
    I got locked down at home with Iris
    Smelling great at the start
    She started to fart
    And kept for herself my old wireless

  25. #235
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Tim Fjord has been getting some drama
    Since his new release: 'Lost Banana'
    They say it's a clone
    That he should go home
    Back to his old job: salmon farmer

  26. #236
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Le vagabond View Post
    During the great Corona virus
    I got locked down at home with Iris
    Smelling great at the start
    She started to fart
    And kept for herself my old wireless
    Another breakup story, adieu Iris
    Keep these coming, Vag, they'll never tire us
    Could it be time to admit
    You find it hard to commit?
    Fairly cruel, after making them desirous

  27. #237
    Basenotes Member Le vagabond's Avatar
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    There was an old beggar of Lyon
    Who always went on and on and on...
    'Oh, that smell of mace
    But not in your face'
    Referring to Cacharel pour L'Homme

  28. #238
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    Default Re: Limericks and only limericks allowed

    Quote Originally Posted by Le vagabond View Post
    There was an old beggar of Lyon
    Who always went on and on and on...
    'Oh, that smell of mace
    But not in your face'
    Referring to Cacharel pour L'Homme
    I consider his story a distraction
    And I sincerely hope it's not getting traction
    What he calls an assault
    Was never my fault
    I'm not in the oversprayers' faction!




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