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  1. #1

    Default What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Random question but I've always wondered this,

    Being a fragrance collector with 50+ fragrances (I'm a male in my late twenties), what does the average woman think about guys that are into this hobby.... not from the perspective of a female collector, just a common female.

    For now, my collection is totally hidden in a drawer perchance visitors were to stumble across it and find it weird. What are your stories with your significant other/past lovers? It is a bit of a unique hobby and I would want to ease someone into it.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    I often tell the girls that I hang with about being into fragances. They usually dig it, even ask to check it them in my room.

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Most non-collectors think collectors are weird unless they have at least a passing interest.

    People found my large CD and LP collection weird if they were only into Top 40 songs, I sold that off and went digital for space concerns.
    People found my affinity for retro games weird too, even if most consoles I just kept since young, told me I could emulate everything. I sold that off too.
    Then I collected movies, and people thought I was weird because Netflix and Amazon Prime Video. I didn't sell them, but I also stopped collecting.
    Same with perfume. People who just wear one to three things think an entire cabinet of hundreds is gluttonous at best, anxiety inducing at worst, and think I'm hopeless.

    I might be hopeless, but I smell amazing.
    oh look, I have a signature
    Discover a searchable archive of my reviews and more at The Scented Devil
    Currently wearing: Invictus by Paco Rabanne

  4. #4

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Zealot Crusader View Post
    Most non-collectors think collectors are weird unless they have at least a passing interest.
    I agree with this. Whatever someone collects will seem weird to some people (male or female).

    If someone gives little to no thought to fragrance (man or woman) any scent collection over 5-6 will strike them as odd.

    Women I know who understand I have an extensive collection have mostly found it interesting. My last girlfriend found it quirky but wasn't particularly put off by it.
    Amused to a degree.

    My ex-boss found it inordinately an "un-masculine" hobby. He was particularly incensed when I implied his choice of BLEU DE CHANEL was a bit pedestrian.

    I'm so old now I really don't care what anyone thinks of this hobby. As a Basenoter with over 50 frags, your train has already pulled out of the "normal" station and you're on the tracks with the rest of us kooks.

    I know at your age, you sometimes worry about what women or others might think. There is no simple answer to your original question. But basically, if someone likes you, they won't give a crap about your hobby.

    I had to laugh you want to "ease them into it." Made me think of the guy in 50 SHADES OF GRAY taking the woman into his sex room for the first time. It's not that extreme. Don't sit on it like it's some horrific bizarre secret.
    Between Covid and retirement I don't get out much. But when I do, I smell real good.

  5. #5

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    The quality of your life will improve immensely the minute you stop worrying about what others think of your personal habits and hobbies.

    It will improve even more when you take genuine interest in others’ quirky hobbies.

    Life is too short to give away any of your own power to trying to “fit in” and “be normal.” Sure, there’s a place for self-improvement in life. But honestly, you’re fine the way you are. Accept and celebrate your unique life. Avoid falling into any kind of trap trying to please others.

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    Basenotes Junkie Alonewithcologne's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    My last girlfriend thought it was weird when she found out I had such a large collection, but she also said she was quite attracted to the scent I usually wore when I was getting to know her: Armani Stronger With You.

  7. #7

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    In my world (specifically) and my society (generally), they love it.
    Currently wearing: Amber Absolute by Tom Ford

  8. #8

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by lukaskrause View Post
    I often tell the girls that I hang with about being into fragances. They usually dig it, even ask to check it them in my room.
    Wolowitz
    Currently wearing: Polo by Ralph Lauren

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    ..they are somewhat charmed!
    FREE AS THE WIND!

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    There are millions of different women and it depends on you more than the perfumes.
    Currently wearing: Clubman by Pinaud

  11. #11

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Most intelligent women equate an interest in fragrances as either a sign of sensitivity or an openness to pleasure.
    Both qualities are plusses. There will be an occasional person who is allergic or has tight boundaries around what proclivities are appropriate to which gender. In general it has been a positive in both my dating and married life.

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ifti View Post
    Wolowitz
    Hahaha, not quite.

    At least they pretend to show some interest. But I have to say none found it weird. I'm 28 btw.

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Zealot Crusader View Post
    Most non-collectors think collectors are weird unless they have at least a passing interest.
    This.
    Remember that while it is perfectly acceptable to criticize the content of a post - criticizing the poster is not.
    Mean spirited, nasty, snide, sarcastic, hateful, and rude individuals on Basenotes don't warrant or deserve my or other Basenoters' acknowledgement or respect.

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    My significant other is into it, but she says that for other people, absolutely yes, they think it's strange.

    What's your boyfriend into? Collecting perfume?? Don't men wear cologne?

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Zealot Crusader View Post
    I might be hopeless, but I smell amazing.
    Amen
    "No one wants advice - only corroboration." - John Steinbeck

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Can't say for sure, but I imagine they think it's quirky. It's not really a concern for me, as I maintain a wardrobe size that wouldn't likely cause anyone to think twice about it.

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    In all my years of dating in my pre-fraghead days, I encountered so many men with oddball hobbies that I don't think I would have batted an eyelash at a perfume collector. It's certainly no weirder than building model railroads or collecting children's toys (excuse me, "action figures").

    One guy had every single horizontal surface in his house covered with owls -- ceramic, plush, metal, paper, felt. Now THAT was weird. And didn't last long, either.

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Zealot Crusader View Post
    Most non-collectors think collectors are weird unless they have at least a passing interest.
    This absolutely. I try to avoid telling people about my "weird obsession".

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    99% of said women will see it as a massive red flag and be repulsed in some way or another.

    You know all those male youtubers? Take a look how their wives/gfs act. They tolerate their indulgence, presumably leveraging it for their own benefit, but they most definitely don't like it.

    Same applies to non youtubers. Anything over, like, 2-3 fragrances will be seen as 'odd'. A lot of women will hate it if a man even has any fragrance that isn't uber masculine and/or basic, it'll send out red flags of a different kind relating to masculinity, values, attitudes to resource acquisition etc.

    Basically, the response is going to be negative - either a minor negative or drastically so. Collecting is NOT a hobby, in my opinion. A hobby requires something more active than buying things - like running marathons, playing a musical instrument, woodwork, or graphic design.
    “If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.”
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Cook.bot View Post
    In all my years of dating in my pre-fraghead days, I encountered so many men with oddball hobbies that I don't think I would have batted an eyelash at a perfume collector. It's certainly no weirder than building model railroads or collecting children's toys (excuse me, "action figures").

    One guy had every single horizontal surface in his house covered with owls -- ceramic, plush, metal, paper, felt. Now THAT was weird. And didn't last long, either.
    This is so true! One of my hobbies is watching operas. To most girls that makes me a boring, effeminate weirdo, but then again, I don't care for the kind of girl who finds the idea of opera distasteful. The important thing, if dating a woman in her twenties, is to find one with interests other than Netflix, Facebook, weed, alcohol, intersectional activism, and yoga. By the way, those are very hard to find.

  21. #21

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Who cares? I like what I like.

  22. #22
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by vitaman View Post
    Most intelligent women equate an interest in fragrances as either a sign of sensitivity or an openness to pleasure.
    Both qualities are plusses. There will be an occasional person who is allergic or has tight boundaries around what proclivities are appropriate to which gender. In general it has been a positive in both my dating and married life.
    This.
    Currently wearing: Lui by Mazzolari

  23. #23

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by slpfrsly View Post
    99% of said women will see it as a massive red flag and be repulsed in some way or another.

    You know all those male youtubers? Take a look how their wives/gfs act. They tolerate their indulgence, presumably leveraging it for their own benefit, but they most definitely don't like it.

    Same applies to non youtubers. Anything over, like, 2-3 fragrances will be seen as 'odd'. A lot of women will hate it if a man even has any fragrance that isn't uber masculine and/or basic, it'll send out red flags of a different kind relating to masculinity, values, attitudes to resource acquisition etc.

    Basically, the response is going to be negative - either a minor negative or drastically so. Collecting is NOT a hobby, in my opinion. A hobby requires something more active than buying things - like running marathons, playing a musical instrument, woodwork, or graphic design.
    If you're charming, in reasonable shape, and can hold a convo, I don't see it as a "massive red flag" at all. Somewhat odd, perhaps, but tons of dudes also collect shoes, hats, and sports memorabilia. Also, the biggest "red flag" is to care too much what someone else thinks, especially in the beginnings of a courtship. It suggests a kind of a neediness. On the other hand, I have less than 15 frags and usually make a joke about it with gals because I do feel a bit like a dandy (though a damn fine smelling one at that). I've received anything from "I love it" to "that's cute" to simply poking fun in a good natured manner. I do agree that it's not really a hobby, per se.
    "No one wants advice - only corroboration." - John Steinbeck

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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by slpfrsly View Post
    99% of said women will see it as a massive red flag and be repulsed in some way or another. You know all those male youtubers? Take a look how their wives/gfs act. They tolerate their indulgence, presumably leveraging it for their own benefit, but they most definitely don't like it. Same applies to non youtubers. Anything over, like, 2-3 fragrances will be seen as 'odd'. A lot of women will hate it if a man even has any fragrance that isn't uber masculine and/or basic, it'll send out red flags of a different kind relating to masculinity, values, attitudes to resource acquisition etc. Basically, the response is going to be negative - either a minor negative or drastically so. Collecting is NOT a hobby, in my opinion. A hobby requires something more active than buying things - like running marathons, playing a musical instrument, woodwork, or graphic design.
    I disagree, and in my experience, is wrong. My wife indulges it, and actually encourages it. In fact, I've gotten her curious about, and starting to collect, perfume. I'm somewhat of a foodie too, so for me to have an interest in pleasuring my olfactory sense is much in line with desiring to pleasure my sense of taste. One other girl (a friends wife) saw my collection and was impressed by it.


    I think this response (and cook.bot's) is more in line with reality.
    Quote Originally Posted by vitaman View Post
    Most intelligent women equate an interest in fragrances as either a sign of sensitivity or an openness to pleasure.
    Both qualities are plusses. There will be an occasional person who is allergic or has tight boundaries around what proclivities are appropriate to which gender. In general it has been a positive in both my dating and married life.
    Currently wearing: Red Tobacco by Mancera

  25. #25
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by rmm.0811 View Post
    Random question but I've always wondered this,

    Being a fragrance collector with 50+ fragrances (I'm a male in my late twenties), what does the average woman think about guys that are into this hobby.... not from the perspective of a female collector, just a common female.
    Most of the women I know, professionally or casually, would think it's weird or geeky. In fact, most of the people I know in general aren't the types that you can share something like that with.

    For now, my collection is totally hidden in a drawer perchance visitors were to stumble across it and find it weird. What are your stories with your significant other/past lovers? It is a bit of a unique hobby and I would want to ease someone into it.
    I keep my collection in a cabinet with doors in my bedroom, but I've only hit the 30-40 bottle mark recently. Before that, I was at around 10-15. I've discussed my interest in fragrances with a couple of women I dated, but that's because I didn't care what they thought in the first place. Meaning, if they had a problem with me being myself, well, there's the door. Anyways, they'd tell me which bottles were their favorite, tell me what kind they'd like me to get, they're favorites from the past, etc. One was even in Macy's helping me sample women's perfume because I wanted to see if there was anything that I could wear.

    Some of the women I know have their bathroom countertops covered with perfumes, so as long as a guy doesn't have more than them, maybe they wouldn't bat an eye?

    But I try to keep my hobbies to myself these days. Like I said, most of the people I've come across don't have comparable interests themselves. Anything outside of networking/traveling/pop-culture and you're considered peculiar. Comics and sci-fi are okay though, because that's considered "cool" and mainstream because of The Big Bang Theory.

  26. #26
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by slpfrsly View Post
    99% of said women will see it as a massive red flag and be repulsed in some way or another.

    You know all those male youtubers? Take a look how their wives/gfs act. They tolerate their indulgence, presumably leveraging it for their own benefit, but they most definitely don't like it.

    Same applies to non youtubers. Anything over, like, 2-3 fragrances will be seen as 'odd'. A lot of women will hate it if a man even has any fragrance that isn't uber masculine and/or basic, it'll send out red flags of a different kind relating to masculinity, values, attitudes to resource acquisition etc.

    Basically, the response is going to be negative - either a minor negative or drastically so.
    I very much agree, but to be fair, most men shouldn't be pursuing 99% of women. What are the odds that 99% of women are going to be compatible with you and make a great wife and mother?

    Quote Originally Posted by Alonewithcologne View Post
    This is so true! One of my hobbies is watching operas. To most girls that makes me a boring, effeminate weirdo, but then again, I don't care for the kind of girl who finds the idea of opera distasteful. The important thing, if dating a woman in her twenties, is to find one with interests other than Netflix, Facebook, weed, alcohol, intersectional activism, and yoga. By the way, those are very hard to find.
    This is also true.

    Quote Originally Posted by hellbentforleather View Post
    If you're charming, in reasonable shape, and can hold a convo, I don't see it as a "massive red flag" at all. Somewhat odd, perhaps, but tons of dudes also collect shoes, hats, and sports memorabilia.
    But collecting shoes, hats, and sports memorabilia is considered a mainstream hobby for men. Athletes, actors, and rappers show off their shoe collections all the time, which usually consists of just about every release of Jordans. Dr. Dre has a video showing off how he wears a different pair of white Nikes or Jordans for each day of the week. All that is loosely or closely connected to athleticism and sports in some fashion. Perfume, not at all.

    As far as being charming, in reasonable shape, able to hold a conversation, and while we're at it, throw in good-looking into the mix, then yeah, nearly any geeky hobby is going to look cool or cute.

    Also, the biggest "red flag" is to care too much what someone else thinks, especially in the beginnings of a courtship. It suggests a kind of a neediness.
    This.

  27. #27

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Based so far on subjective personal experience (s) alone: seconding all/any opinions regrading this as a sign of strangeness, weirdness, nonconformity etc.
    However also experienced that the feedback is more positive from the ladies more into fragrance already and/or not minding to have a few new additions and/or testing possibilities, including male/unisex, added to their own often spectacular fragrance collections.

  28. #28
    Basenotes Junkie MisterGrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    I'm more curious about what fraghead women think of guys who collect perfumes.

  29. #29
    Basenotes Institution Danny Mitchell's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    I think it's somewhat odd that I have so many fragrances so I fully expect most girls I date would think the same way lol.
    "Ducks eat for free at Subway."
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  30. #30

    Default Re: What do most (non-fraghead) women think of guys who collect perfumes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Danny Mitchell View Post
    I think it's somewhat odd that I have so many fragrances so I fully expect most girls I date would think the same way lol.
    Exactly. I'm somewhat self-effacing about it so it's a whole lot of whatever haha.
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